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Thread: Why do people hate INTJs?

  1. #281
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    "Well, I don't think the problem is in the judgment, so much as it's in the lack of receptiveness to criticism and the acceptance of individuality."

    Maybe the criticism comes from being judged. if one is insecure in who they think they are, any judgment could be perceived as a threat to ones own believe of who they are. By this same logic, maybe if one is emotionally detached from judgment, it is because they are confident in knowing who they are.

    perhaps the judger does not understand the emotions caused in others for being judged, because the judger assumes that others have the same understanding of ones self, and would not understand the cause of conflict with the judgee, as the judge is only trying to find likeness in others??

  2. #282
    Senior Member Array ceecee's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by chubber View Post


    Why do you have a hard time understanding them? Can you give us an example?
    Pretty much every single thing Coriolis said and a few specifics I have witnessed....

    Ridiculous fears. Such as certain stores they've never been in or a fear of finishing work or a project too early because they will have "early completion remorse". I don't even grasp that on any level.

    Things happening to them such as having a house foreclosed, a vehicle repossessed or other major financial issues and they absolutely do not ever do anything different to prevent such things in the future. Nothing. Like they are hoping it will happen again.

    Winging it on a level completely mind boggling to anyone else. I mean leaving for a cross country trip with a 1/8 tank of gas or constantly running out of toilet paper. I don't even want to know how you wing that.
    I like to rock n' roll all night and *part* of every day. I usually have errands... I can only rock from like 1-3.

  3. #283
    Make 2017 a good one! Array Amargith's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Coriolis View Post
    I have always been able to understand the misunderstanding part much better than the intimidation factor. Why, when people misunderstand us, don't they instead find us rude, or weird, or stupid, or even laughable rather than intimidating? Intimidation implies an element of fear or threat, which seems to go well beyond simple misunderstanding. Do people really feel threatened, and if so, by what??
    Because of Te.

    You state things in an objective, detached and unmovable way. And in the proccess you come off rigid. allknowing, arrogant and narrowminded. Just like Fe for that matter. You do not seem open to discussing alternatives though youre likely more up for it than a Ti user would be. There is a certain 'this is the way things are ' which is amplified times ten by your succinctness and lack of focus on the social realm - in other words, your focus is on the situation youre discussing and not on the communication youre autopiloting, leaving the other person feeling like an ant encountering a boot. More over, Ni isnt exactly something most people have access to AND it makes you guys SUCK at both realising youre not providing the other person with enough information to verifiy the conclusion as well as suck at elaborating when specifically asked.

    And if that aint enough, your general love for efficieny, execution, addressing a problem, and intolerance for what you consider endless debate, inane questions and repetition, not to mention general indifference as to whether the other person agrees with you and general tendency to consider people useless or morons when they cannot reach -to you - obvious conclusions doesnt exactly do much to rectify your impatient, mystically allknowing yet callous, ruthless, competently dangerous evil overlord impression. Its hard to predict something you do not understand and is potentially too hard and harmful to scout. And when such things cannot be avoided, they fit the definition of a trigger of stress perfectly. Iow, its the definition of the worst type of obstacle you can encounter.

    In short: your competence coupled with access to knowledge you seem to pull out of thin air and your apparent unwillingness to share that source as well as your generally perceived disregard for accountability to others on top of your unwillingness to prioritize the person in your communication raise a red flag. Its a culmination of little things.

    And dont take this badly, but they are the traits of a lethal predator. Istps suffer from the same problem,btw.



    Still wondering why people are intimidated, scared or at the very least uncomfortable and mildly offended when talking to you?

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  4. #284
    FRACTALICIOUS Array phobik's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by ceecee View Post
    Pretty much every single thing Coriolis said and a few specifics I have witnessed....

    Ridiculous fears. Such as certain stores they've never been in or a fear of finishing work or a project too early because they will have "early completion remorse". I don't even grasp that on any level.

    Things happening to them such as having a house foreclosed, a vehicle repossessed or other major financial issues and they absolutely do not ever do anything different to prevent such things in the future. Nothing. Like they are hoping it will happen again.

    Winging it on a level completely mind boggling to anyone else. I mean leaving for a cross country trip with a 1/8 tank of gas or constantly running out of toilet paper. I don't even want to know how you wing that.










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  5. #285
    failed poetry slam career Array chubber's Avatar
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    haha, access to knowledge we seem to pull out of thin air. LOL

    sounds familiar.

  6. #286
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    Consider how INTJs lead with subjective, introverted Ni. So their first coping strategy sources from their subjective inner landscape. With aux of Te which is enslaved to the focus of their subjective dominant function of Ni, it's used to confirm bias and control environment, instead of evaluating objective reality against internal subjective landscape.

    Their defense mechanism when younger where it becomes a coping strategy as they mature, is Fi which is a rigid black and white, value based decision maker. Once again, it's an introverted function which means that there's no objective criteria that it sources from.

    Add in Se as their inferior function, where it knee jerks like all other inferior functions, which means it manifests in behaviours like crass lusting (crude comments that lack the inference of flirtation) and greed (eating too much, love of money for money sakes, acquisition mentality of people, etc.).

    Is it surprising that people don't like immature INTJs? This doesn't mean that INTJs can't mature to healthy, happy and likable adults but it appears to take more time for INTJs because their dom and relief functions cause them to be too inside their heads.

  7. #287
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    Quote Originally Posted by Amargith View Post
    Because of Te.

    You state things in an objective, detached and unmovable way. And in the proccess you come off rigid. allknowing, arrogant and narrowminded.
    Yes to Amargith's entire post. I live with an INTJ and he can be quite infuriating because when in a discussion (which quickly escalates into an argument) he expresses himself as if he is 100% correct, every time.

    To his benefit tho, he often steps aside, contemplates, then comes back with more flexibility with his pov. Maybe it depends on the ratio of J to P in the person.

  8. #288
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    Quote Originally Posted by andante View Post
    Consider how INTJs lead with subjective, introverted Ni. So their first coping strategy sources from their subjective inner landscape. With aux of Te which is enslaved to the focus of their subjective dominant function of Ni, it's used to confirm bias and control environment, instead of evaluating objective reality against internal subjective landscape.

    Their defense mechanism when younger where it becomes a coping strategy as they mature, is Fi which is a rigid black and white, value based decision maker. Once again, it's an introverted function which means that there's no objective criteria that it sources from.

    Add in Se as their inferior function, where it knee jerks like all other inferior functions, which means it manifests in behaviours like crass lusting (crude comments that lack the inference of flirtation) and greed (eating too much, love of money for money sakes, acquisition mentality of people, etc.).

    Is it surprising that people don't like immature INTJs? This doesn't mean that INTJs can't mature to healthy, happy and likable adults but it appears to take more time for INTJs because their dom and relief functions cause them to be too inside their heads.
    Very beautifully thought out. I think it's even sadder when the immature INTJ is well into their 40's or 50's and still has these issues.

    Otherwise I think INTJs age like fine wines.... getting better with age so long as they are able to learn how to balance that inner realm of irrationality with actual reality instead of just using whatever bits they find to fit their ideas.

  9. #289
    Senior Member Array Jaguar's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Amargith View Post
    And if that aint enough, your general love for efficieny, execution, addressing a problem, and intolerance for what you consider endless debate, inane questions and repetition, not to mention general indifference as to whether the other person agrees with you and general tendency to consider people useless or morons when they cannot reach -to you - obvious conclusions doesnt exactly do much to rectify your impatient, mystically allknowing yet callous, ruthless, competently dangerous evil overlord impression.
    So, what's the problem?
    The east and the west are mine, the north and the south are mine. All seems beautiful to me.
    — Walt Whitman

  10. #290
    Make 2017 a good one! Array Amargith's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Jaguar View Post
    So, what's the problem?
    Coriolis asked why it was intimidating. I'm just clarifying why it would be experienced that way
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