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[ENTP] How do I (an INFP) become an ENTP?

Abbey

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Nov 12, 2012
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I'm tired of being an INFP. All I ever do is feel, think and make myself promises to help me become a perfect person. I constantly break my promises. Everyday I wake up thinking, 'Today will be the day that I start life and become the ideal me.' I. Always. Fail. The fact that I can't change myself sickens me.

I'm irretrievably overwhelmed with emotions-the world is so beautiful and there's so much pain in it. I want every single human being to be happy, to be the best person they can be. It's too big though, I don't know how to help the world because it's too chaotic and I don't know everything, not even close. If I did know everything I wouldn't know how to organize that information, I don't even know how to organize my current thoughts. There are to many factors in life and to me, life is overwhelming, confusing, hard, chaotic, a puzzle, uncontrollable- it's too much and it's too hard.

I want to become an ENTP. I want to be like Barney Stinson, the Joker, Bugs Bunny, Tom Sawyer, Tyler Durdan, Jack Sparrow, Ferris Bueller, Tony Stark.. some are arguably not ENTP, but I hope you understand what I'm looking to become. I want to not be so emotional.. I want to be clever, tough, adventurous, brave, quick-witted, persuasive, and most of all, in control.

Like an INFP, ENTPs see the world as full of possibilities, the difference is that they know how to navigate it.

Please tell me specific steps I can take, actions I can do, thoughts I can think to become an ENTP. Thank you.
 

AphroditeGoneAwry

failure to thrive
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I want to be a T too. Twould be easier.
 

skylights

i love
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You don't.

You realistically can't become an ENTP, but even if you could, it wouldn't make life any easier. ENTPs don't really know how to navigate - ENPs fly by the seat of our pants, riding the waves of possibility and new information, and sometimes we get swept under and scraped along the bottom. Js are more into the art of navigation, but they tend to lose the journey for focus on the map.

I used to do the same thing of waking up and trying to be perfect - I still get caught up in that sometimes - and it never works. But you can do one little thing to start moving that direction, and then another, and then another. You know how to change one little facet of yourself to be more like who you want to be. You know how to help one person in one little way - then another, then another. Baby steps, all the time, every day. You don't have to wake up and suddenly be where you want to be, all you have to do is start moving just a little bit in that direction, and then move a little more, and a little more. It's in movement that you can find yourself as the person you want to become, not in the stillness once the becoming is over. I am working on this one myself.

As an INFP you can be all those things you want to be - clever, tough, adventurous, brave, quick-witted, persuasive, and in control. You just will have to be them in your own INFP way. A clever INFP would probably be literate and witty. A tough INFP would probably be decisive and stand their moral ground. An adventurous INFP (I have a close friend who I believe is an adventurous INFP, by the way -) would probably be (she is) creative, exploratory, and flexible. A brave INFP would probably be ready to speak up against injustice. A quick-witted INFP would probably have that snarky dark sense of humor. A persuasive INFP would probably tug at others on an emotional and value-based level. An in-control INFP would know what she wants and be relentless about pursuing it.

You will never become your best self if you try to become an ENTP instead. :)
 

Standuble

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Aug 23, 2011
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I'm tired of being an INFP. All I ever do is feel, think and make myself promises to help me become a perfect person. I constantly break my promises. Everyday I wake up thinking, 'Today will be the day that I start life and become the ideal me.' I. Always. Fail. The fact that I can't change myself sickens me.

I'm irretrievably overwhelmed with emotions-the world is so beautiful and there's so much pain in it. I want every single human being to be happy, to be the best person they can be. It's too big though, I don't know how to help the world because it's too chaotic and I don't know everything, not even close. If I did know everything I wouldn't know how to organize that information, I don't even know how to organize my current thoughts. There are to many factors in life and to me, life is overwhelming, confusing, hard, chaotic, a puzzle, uncontrollable- it's too much and it's too hard.

I want to become an ENTP. I want to be like Barney Stinson, the Joker, Bugs Bunny, Tom Sawyer, Tyler Durdan, Jack Sparrow, Ferris Bueller, Tony Stark.. some are arguably not ENTP, but I hope you understand what I'm looking to become. I want to not be so emotional.. I want to be clever, tough, adventurous, brave, quick-witted, persuasive, and most of all, in control.

Like an INFP, ENTPs see the world as full of possibilities, the difference is that they know how to navigate it.

Please tell me specific steps I can take, actions I can do, thoughts I can think to become an ENTP. Thank you.

Have a brain transplant? You cannot change your type, ENTP is out of your reach. However some of the strengths you seem to desire are not. My first question is: how old are you? Becoming an INFP does become (ever so slightly!) easier IMO as you get older. Also, the NeSiTe will develop themselves if you let them and you would become more rounded and thus better able to navigate the world. The Fi is a strength and not a weakness. It works with the Ne (for the most part) and not against it. If you have trouble applying yourself then I would suspect that is a lack of Te - difficulty organising and lack of tolerance for the follow up as you have no value of it.

My advice: Become comfortable with Ne, find people (in real life if possible) who you can exercise it around and don't be afraid to make mistakes. Ne is like a vehicle, you need to put your foot down on the pedal and it gradually accelerates until you are cruising at top speed. Once it is you may find that you aren't so different from Bugs Bunny or Captain Jack Sparrow after all.

I do know what you mean, I have often wished I were an NT type too. But ENTPs have issues we don't have to face and why not have (most) of the strengths without having the same weaknesses?
 

The Great One

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I'm tired of being an INFP. All I ever do is feel, think and make myself promises to help me become a perfect person. I constantly break my promises. Everyday I wake up thinking, 'Today will be the day that I start life and become the ideal me.' I. Always. Fail. The fact that I can't change myself sickens me.

I'm irretrievably overwhelmed with emotions-the world is so beautiful and there's so much pain in it. I want every single human being to be happy, to be the best person they can be. It's too big though, I don't know how to help the world because it's too chaotic and I don't know everything, not even close. If I did know everything I wouldn't know how to organize that information, I don't even know how to organize my current thoughts. There are to many factors in life and to me, life is overwhelming, confusing, hard, chaotic, a puzzle, uncontrollable- it's too much and it's too hard.

I want to become an ENTP. I want to be like Barney Stinson, the Joker, Bugs Bunny, Tom Sawyer, Tyler Durdan, Jack Sparrow, Ferris Bueller, Tony Stark.. some are arguably not ENTP, but I hope you understand what I'm looking to become. I want to not be so emotional.. I want to be clever, tough, adventurous, brave, quick-witted, persuasive, and most of all, in control.

Like an INFP, ENTPs see the world as full of possibilities, the difference is that they know how to navigate it.

Please tell me specific steps I can take, actions I can do, thoughts I can think to become an ENTP. Thank you.

You don't need to become an ENTP. You need to develop Te, and many of these problems would be solved.
 

Abbey

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But ENTP's have Ti not Te. I feel like extroverted judging types can be controlling, I get really controlling when I do use my Te. It annoys me.
 

Abbey

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I expected to hear you can't change your type. The biggest thing I want to change, which I probably should've specified in my original post, is that I'm tired of wanting to change. I'm tired of trying to be perfect. That's why I want to be an ENTP, they don't seem to care to be perfect. I basically just want to be the opposite of what I am.
I'm 16 years old, which could be a reason why I'm so emotional.
Thank you all for replying with your wise advice.

Why can't one change his MBTI type?
Where does one's MBTI type come from?
 

violet_crown

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I think you're supposed to think lovely thoughts or clap your hands or both. Either way, it requires pixie dust. Lots of pixie dust.

You don't need to become an ENTP. You need to develop Te, and many of these problems would be solved.

Or this.
 

Standuble

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Aug 23, 2011
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I expected to hear you can't change your type. The biggest thing I want to change, which I probably should've specified in my original post, is that I'm tired of wanting to change. I'm tired of trying to be perfect. That's why I want to be an ENTP, they don't seem to care to be perfect. I basically just want to be the opposite of what I am.
I'm 16 years old, which could be a reason why I'm so emotional.
Thank you all for replying with your wise advice.

Why can't one change his MBTI type?
Where does one's MBTI type come from?

If I may post a response there are many proposed reasons why someone cannot change their type. My preferred one is that MBTI and function theory are just attempts to define the brain into different processes and that the stronger a function the more developed parts of the brain were. It follows that to change your function order you would need to develop parts of the brain you don't use as much to the point where they have more potency than your previously developed areas.

I have a question for you: Are you truly tired of trying to be perfect or are you merely tired of feeling exhausted whilst in the process of attempting to become and/or tired of shame or frustration when you don't feel you have succeeded? Do you feel you would be content with a pursuit of being perfect if the process was pain-free?
 

Abbey

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The latter, I want to be perfect, but it's too hard. I can barely even do things normal people can do, like complete homework on time. Then I change for awhile, do my homework for like a month and after, revert back to being lazy, unmotivated and just sad.
I'll never give up on trying to be better though, which is the worst of all. I'll never be satisfied.
 

Standuble

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The latter, I want to be perfect, but it's too hard. I can barely even do things normal people can do, like complete homework on time. Then I change for awhile, do my homework for like a month and after, revert back to being lazy, unmotivated and just sad.
I'll never give up on trying to be better though, which is the worst of all. I'll never be satisfied.

I relate to all of that unfortunately. Poor thing :( The question is though whether ENTPs are immune from any frustration as they certainly aren't when it comes to being unmotivated and lazy. Have you been checked for ADHD?

There isn't much I can say but in my case (I'm 25 now) the sharp edges have faded and there is a bigger capacity for follow through and the mind can organise and strategise plans to complete tasks (though there is uncertainty when applying a long line of logic.) Don't give up on yourself just yet, the teenage years are really hard and when they pass perhaps the desire for perfection would be just that little more tolerable.
 

skylights

i love
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I expected to hear you can't change your type. The biggest thing I want to change, which I probably should've specified in my original post, is that I'm tired of wanting to change. I'm tired of trying to be perfect. That's why I want to be an ENTP, they don't seem to care to be perfect. I basically just want to be the opposite of what I am.
I'm 16 years old, which could be a reason why I'm so emotional.
Thank you all for replying with your wise advice.

Why can't one change his MBTI type?
Where does one's MBTI type come from?

If it's any consolation, it's a common thing in mid-teenage years to test the limits of yourself and seek to change yourself entirely - the "rebellious" phase in another manifestation. The teenage years are when most of us play with and eventually solidify identity - for a 4, that will be even more potent. Creating and seeking an idealized self is very much a part of that. It's also a time when life tends to seem comparatively harder. It will probably ease up in a few years, then get harder again, then ease again.

Standuble gave a pretty good explanation, but basically MBTI is simply a description of brain-pattern preferences, describing what mental strategies we tend to use most to take in (Ne/Ni/Se/Si) and organize (Ti/Te/Fi/Fe) data. It's not so much that you can't change than that the likelihood is so infinitesimally small that there's little point - it's probably only realistic in the case of major brain trauma - because you've been using and building on these strategies ever since you gained consciousness in the womb, and your brain connections have grown and developed around these patterns.

Not to give you a stupidly simple answer, but why do you feel like you have to be perfect? What problems would it fix? Like Rex and The Great One said, developing your detached, logical side would help. You will get less controlling with Te as you learn to wield it more finely and apply it in a more precise manner. It can feel heavy-handed when it's immature, I know that from personal experience! Kind of like thudding a big wooden club around. It gets better with practice, though.

What you wrote also made me think of this:
Enneagram Institute said:
Fours typically have problems with a negative self-image and chronically low self-esteem. They attempt to compensate for this by cultivating a Fantasy Self—an idealized self-image which is built up primarily in their imaginations. A Four we know shared with us that he spent most of his spare time listening to classical music while fantasizing about being a great concert pianist—à la Vladimir Horowitz. Unfortunately, his commitment to practicing fell far short of his fantasized self-image, and he was often embarrassed when people asked him to play for them. His actual abilities, while not poor, became sources of shame.
 

Stephano

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Aug 8, 2012
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I'm tired of being an INFP.
I want to become an ENTP.

Just being an ENTP doesn't let you be like Barney Stinson or Tony Stark, it just takes confidence a bit of craziness to be a superhero ;)

All I ever do is feel, think and make myself promises to help me become a perfect person. I constantly break my promises. Everyday I wake up thinking, 'Today will be the day that I start life and become the ideal me.' I. Always. Fail. The fact that I can't change myself sickens me.

Don't try to be a perfect person. No one even does like perfect persons. Look at me, I'm sitting here in front of the computer and haven't got anything better to do than writing posts in this forum. :D
Cheer up! You're at least Johnny Depp, Jude Law and Tim Burton.
 

Abbey

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Wow thanks, that makes a lot of sense.

I want to be perfect because everything is so overwhelming. I need for everything in my life to be perfect so I can function without worrying. I get very stressed when things are not where they should be or how they should be. It makes me so frustrated and cry a lot and almost. It also makes me scared I guess.. idk what of though. Either my life needs to be COMPLETELY organized, or it'll be a huge mess and I'll give up on trying at anything. That may sound crazy, but my mind can only take so much.
 

Abbey

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Did you just..change? Or did you do something to change?
 

skylights

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Wow thanks, that makes a lot of sense.

I want to be perfect because everything is so overwhelming. I need for everything in my life to be perfect so I can function without worrying. I get very stressed when things are not where they should be or how they should be. It makes me so frustrated and cry a lot and almost. It also makes me scared I guess.. idk what of though. Either my life needs to be COMPLETELY organized, or it'll be a huge mess and I'll give up on trying at anything. That may sound crazy, but my mind can only take so much.

:hug: Have you ever been tested for OCD or anxiety? Serious question. It might be helpful.

Either way, talking to a counselor, if you haven't ever tried it, might be really useful. They can help you develop strategies to change your thought and behavior habits so that you are less stressed.
 

Zarathustra

Let Go Of Your Team
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Don't try to become an ENTP -- you're not one. Do, however, develop your auxiliary Ne.

That's your first step toward personal development (in Jungian typology, at least).

Fwiw, tho, your issues likely have more to do with your being an enneagram 4.

Resolve those issues, and you probably won't care about being an INFP.
 
W

WALMART

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I'm tired of being an INFP. All I ever do is feel, think and make myself promises to help me become a perfect person. I constantly break my promises. Everyday I wake up thinking, 'Today will be the day that I start life and become the ideal me.' I. Always. Fail. The fact that I can't change myself sickens me.


Ya. Every thought counts, methinks.
 

WoodsWoman

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Another thing about being an idealist INFP, is that it's like learning: the more we achieve, the more we comprehend that there IS to achieve. My ideals about 'the perfect me' have changed over the years. Though I STILL lack confidence in myself regarding any subject I do not know enough about to reasonably teach a college level class on. However, no matter what I think of what I consider my shortcomings, I'm still perfectly ME.
 

Stanton Moore

morose bourgeoisie
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Abbey, you don't need to be perfect.
Everyone has insecurities and shortcomings, and it's really easy to see that in yourself and be blind to it in others. But believe me, no matter how they seem, others have the same struggles as you, more or less.
I assume that you are accepting of shortcomings in others. I assume that you wouldn't push someone away for being imperfect...
So please stop doing this to yourself. It is possibe to accept yourself as imperfect and still have compassion for yourself, just as you naturally do for others.
 
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