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  1. #21
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    Quote Originally Posted by Abbey View Post
    I'm tired of being an INFP. All I ever do is feel, think and make myself promises to help me become a perfect person. I constantly break my promises. Everyday I wake up thinking, 'Today will be the day that I start life and become the ideal me.' I. Always. Fail. The fact that I can't change myself sickens me.

    I'm irretrievably overwhelmed with emotions-the world is so beautiful and there's so much pain in it. I want every single human being to be happy, to be the best person they can be. It's too big though, I don't know how to help the world because it's too chaotic and I don't know everything, not even close. If I did know everything I wouldn't know how to organize that information, I don't even know how to organize my current thoughts. There are to many factors in life and to me, life is overwhelming, confusing, hard, chaotic, a puzzle, uncontrollable- it's too much and it's too hard.

    I want to become an ENTP. I want to be like Barney Stinson, the Joker, Bugs Bunny, Tom Sawyer, Tyler Durdan, Jack Sparrow, Ferris Bueller, Tony Stark.. some are arguably not ENTP, but I hope you understand what I'm looking to become. I want to not be so emotional.. I want to be clever, tough, adventurous, brave, quick-witted, persuasive, and most of all, in control.

    Like an INFP, ENTPs see the world as full of possibilities, the difference is that they know how to navigate it.

    Please tell me specific steps I can take, actions I can do, thoughts I can think to become an ENTP. Thank you.
    Congratulations' you're a thinker. You like to make statements about what makes sense. Sometimes things make so much sense to you that you have to correct other people who don't make sense. Then these people get upset and say hurtful things to you. Sometimes you go through the most prestigious college wondering, "wow, now that I achieved that, lets do something big with my life!" So now you're a biomechanical engineer who just invented the first robot with a human brain. You get the nobel peace prize because that's what ENTP's get when they invent stuff. You go your whole life accomplishing fantastic things because you have the mental organization to do so. You're at the top of a skyscraper getting your dick sucked and you invariably do not care about who these people are because women are a dime a dozen. You look out the window of the city wondering what it would be like if you were a feeler who had real friends that you openned up to and cared about in a deep personal manner. You wonder what it would be like if you lived that life. After reading all those books and gathering all that knowledge and knowing everything there is to know and inventing everything there is to invent you wonder "what is the purpose to life? why do I feel unsatisfied?" You wonder why people get upset when you correct them. Those who are jealous of your accomplishments seek to destroy you or thwart your efforts to success. You meet someone who is incredibly beautiful. This person is suave, creative, smart, funny, responsible etc. You talk to her, but you're too logical. Too blunt. Too unemotional to understand the subtle nuances in communication that make a conversation smooth. Suddenly you're made fun of because you're clumsy and socially awkward. You feel hurt and rejected but don't realize you feel this way until you've hurt someone else without realizing it. Sometimes you'll be sitting there deep in thought, and someone will ask you why you're sad. You'll reply, "I'm not sad, I'm just thinking." Phew, you managed to thwart one person. Now lets thwart another 30 per week until you eventually lose patience and think there is something wrong with you. Sometimes you see people being happy who have no money but plenty of friends and wonder, "gee, wouldn't it be nice to be that way?"

  2. #22
    Senior Member Ene's Avatar
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    Abbey,

    Sit down and make a list of 10 things that make you special and maybe, just maybe, you'll realize they're not worth trading off to become someone else.

    Don't compare yourself to others. No matter what type you are or what type you compare yourself to, you'll always come up short. Just work to discover who you already are and then hone your assets and work on your libilities.

    Every type's all right. Being an ENTP is not better than being an INFP. And ENTPs aren't any happier. They just have different problems.

    INFPs are often a moral compass for the rest of the world and without a compass of some sort, people get lost. But on the flip side, it's not easy being a compass. People get mad at you when you don't point in the direction they want to go. I know we don't hear it a lot but I know from having several very close INFP friends that it takes a lot of courage to stand true to who and what you are. INFPs can be among the most courageous of all people, not a loud in your face domineering courage, but a quiet strength that endures like a distance runner. Sure, when they are very young, they have to learn to navigate the emotional waters but it can be done. You can work on developing your Ti and you can challenge yourself and put yourself out there a bit, but at the core, don't dislike who you are. Don't try to trade it away like it's somehow inferior, because it's not.

    Feelings come. Feelings go. They are undependable. Learn to channel them. Hold onto the ones that bring you peace and let go of the ones that cause you pain. Don't despise the gifts you have been given.

    ENTPs are okay, too, but knowing how to navigate the external world is in no way superior to knowing how to navigate the inner world.

    I meet a lot of INFPs [maybe because I'm a writer/poet and they seem to float around in my circle of friends a great deal]...anyway, I meet a lot of INFPs who want to be somebody else and there's not one thing wrong with what they are except they look at others and compare themselves.

    Besides, we often change as we grow older. Chances are that you haven't even fully come into you auxillary function yet, much less your secondary or tertiary ones...give it some time. Find all that is good about INFPs and strive to be that. Yeah, Tony Stark's okay but he's not better than A.A. Milne, Edgar Allan Poe, JK Rowling or William Blake...not better, just different. It takes all kinds. I mean, well for Pete's sake, where would the world be without Winnie the Pooh?

    Okay. It's midnight. I've got to get up at 5:30. I hope you start the day realizing that you're already a pretty cool person with a big heart and willing mind. That's cool no matter what type you call yourself.
    A student said to his master: "You teach me fighting, but you talk about peace. How do you reconcile the two?" The master replied: "It is better to be a warrior in a garden than to be a gardener in a war." - unknown/Chinese

    http://www.typologycentral.com/forum...=61024&page=14

  3. #23
    Senior Member ThatsWhatHeSaid's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Abbey View Post
    I'm tired of being an INFP. All I ever do is feel, think and make myself promises to help me become a perfect person. I constantly break my promises. Everyday I wake up thinking, 'Today will be the day that I start life and become the ideal me.' I. Always. Fail. The fact that I can't change myself sickens me.

    I'm irretrievably overwhelmed with emotions-the world is so beautiful and there's so much pain in it. I want every single human being to be happy, to be the best person they can be. It's too big though, I don't know how to help the world because it's too chaotic and I don't know everything, not even close. If I did know everything I wouldn't know how to organize that information, I don't even know how to organize my current thoughts. There are to many factors in life and to me, life is overwhelming, confusing, hard, chaotic, a puzzle, uncontrollable- it's too much and it's too hard.

    I want to become an ENTP. I want to be like Barney Stinson, the Joker, Bugs Bunny, Tom Sawyer, Tyler Durdan, Jack Sparrow, Ferris Bueller, Tony Stark.. some are arguably not ENTP, but I hope you understand what I'm looking to become. I want to not be so emotional.. I want to be clever, tough, adventurous, brave, quick-witted, persuasive, and most of all, in control.

    Like an INFP, ENTPs see the world as full of possibilities, the difference is that they know how to navigate it.

    Please tell me specific steps I can take, actions I can do, thoughts I can think to become an ENTP. Thank you.
    I identify with some of the things you said. I think what changes is expectations and realism. You can't fix everyone and you can't transform into your ideal self. In fact, transforming is probably what's keeping you from being closer to your ideal. By that I mean, the pressure you put on yourself to be someone else, and the implied self-rejection and self-hate that fuels that drive to transform.

    Life is overwhelming and confusing no matter what type you are, unless you're an idiot. It's not really supposed to make sense. That's not what it's intended for. It's not intended for anything. That's not a bad thing; it's just a thing. Some people would even say it's a good thing, but I don't know. I don't think ENTPs are any better at sorting life, much less their own thoughts. It feels like a waterfall of thoughts that we're trying to capture in a small plastic water bottle. It moves quickly.

    I don't think you should try to be an ENTP. I think you should stop thinking about type altogether and just decide what you can do in each moment to bring yourself a little peace of mind. Your life is a journey made up of little steps, not just huge leaps.

  4. #24
    Senior Member Winds of Thor's Avatar
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    Step 1. Tell yourself you're Awesome. Believe it.
    ENTPs think this (at the price of others thinking they're arrogant). It's because they're capable. Socially. With the world around them. In their immediate environment. Just very adaptable. It's not from intentionally being arrogant. Although having said that I can't speak for others.
    "..And the eight and final rule: If this is your first time at Fight Club, you have to fight."
    'Men are meant to be with women. The rest is perversion and mental illness.'

  5. #25
    Almöhi Stephano's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by skylights View Post
    Originally Posted by Enneagram Institute
    Fours typically have problems with a negative self-image and chronically low self-esteem. They attempt to compensate for this by cultivating a Fantasy Self—an idealized self-image which is built up primarily in their imaginations. A Four we know shared with us that he spent most of his spare time listening to classical music while fantasizing about being a great concert pianist—à la Vladimir Horowitz. Unfortunately, his commitment to practicing fell far short of his fantasized self-image, and he was often embarrassed when people asked him to play for them. His actual abilities, while not poor, became sources of shame.
    I did that! Is it possible that 5s do that? (If they're INTP)

  6. #26
    Alexander the Terrible yenom's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Abbey View Post
    I'm tired of being an INFP. All I ever do is feel, think and make myself promises to help me become a perfect person. I constantly break my promises. Everyday I wake up thinking, 'Today will be the day that I start life and become the ideal me.' I. Always. Fail. The fact that I can't change myself sickens me.

    I'm irretrievably overwhelmed with emotions-the world is so beautiful and there's so much pain in it. I want every single human being to be happy, to be the best person they can be. It's too big though, I don't know how to help the world because it's too chaotic and I don't know everything, not even close. If I did know everything I wouldn't know how to organize that information, I don't even know how to organize my current thoughts. There are to many factors in life and to me, life is overwhelming, confusing, hard, chaotic, a puzzle, uncontrollable- it's too much and it's too hard.

    I want to become an ENTP. I want to be like Barney Stinson, the Joker, Bugs Bunny, Tom Sawyer, Tyler Durdan, Jack Sparrow, Ferris Bueller, Tony Stark.. some are arguably not ENTP, but I hope you understand what I'm looking to become. I want to not be so emotional.. I want to be clever, tough, adventurous, brave, quick-witted, persuasive, and most of all, in control.

    Like an INFP, ENTPs see the world as full of possibilities, the difference is that they know how to navigate it.

    Please tell me specific steps I can take, actions I can do, thoughts I can think to become an ENTP. Thank you.
    So you want to be a sadist, an arsonist, and someone who screw other people up for your own benefit?

    No dude... Its not easy to be one.
    The fear of poverty turns people into slaves of money.

    "In this Caesar there are many Mariuses"~Sulla

    Conquer your inner demons first before you conquer the world.

  7. #27
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    Quote Originally Posted by yenom View Post
    So you want to be a sadist, an arsonist, and someone who screw other people up for your own benefit?

    No dude... Its not easy to be one.
    I thought you were an ESTP?

  8. #28
    Alexander the Terrible yenom's Avatar
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    There is the theory of positive self and negative self. Perhaps you are stuck between one and the other.

    When your life is going downhill, you go to negative self. When things become better, and your go to your positive self.
    But then don't try to be someone you are not, because thats just acting.
    The mbti is just BS, it can't define who you are. Your life won't be better pretending to be something you are not.
    Just learn to live with your personality if you are struggling with that, go talk to someone who can help you out.

    You should watch that episode in the simpsons where Lisa pretend to be someone else, but in the end she cannot escape herself. I think that should help.
    The fear of poverty turns people into slaves of money.

    "In this Caesar there are many Mariuses"~Sulla

    Conquer your inner demons first before you conquer the world.

  9. #29
    FRACTALICIOUS phobik's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Abbey View Post
    I'm tired of being an INFP. All I ever do is feel, think and make myself promises to help me become a perfect person. I constantly break my promises. Everyday I wake up thinking, 'Today will be the day that I start life and become the ideal me.' I. Always. Fail. The fact that I can't change myself sickens me.

    I'm irretrievably overwhelmed with emotions-the world is so beautiful and there's so much pain in it. I want every single human being to be happy, to be the best person they can be. It's too big though, I don't know how to help the world because it's too chaotic and I don't know everything, not even close. If I did know everything I wouldn't know how to organize that information, I don't even know how to organize my current thoughts. There are to many factors in life and to me, life is overwhelming, confusing, hard, chaotic, a puzzle, uncontrollable- it's too much and it's too hard.

    I want to become an ENTP. I want to be like Barney Stinson, the Joker, Bugs Bunny, Tom Sawyer, Tyler Durdan, Jack Sparrow, Ferris Bueller, Tony Stark.. some are arguably not ENTP, but I hope you understand what I'm looking to become. I want to not be so emotional.. I want to be clever, tough, adventurous, brave, quick-witted, persuasive, and most of all, in control.

    Like an INFP, ENTPs see the world as full of possibilities, the difference is that they know how to navigate it.

    Please tell me specific steps I can take, actions I can do, thoughts I can think to become an ENTP. Thank you.


    To avoid criticism, do nothing, say nothing, be nothing.
    ~ Elbert Hubbard

    Music provides one of the clearest examples of a much deeper relation between mathematics and human experience.

  10. #30
    Senior Member pinkgraffiti's Avatar
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    yeah. you could try developing Te. that should be in your realm of possibilities.
    Quote Originally Posted by skylights View Post
    You don't.

    You realistically can't become an ENTP, but even if you could, it wouldn't make life any easier. ENTPs don't really know how to navigate - ENPs fly by the seat of our pants, riding the waves of possibility and new information, and sometimes we get swept under and scraped along the bottom. Js are more into the art of navigation, but they tend to lose the journey for focus on the map.

    I used to do the same thing of waking up and trying to be perfect - I still get caught up in that sometimes - and it never works. But you can do one little thing to start moving that direction, and then another, and then another. You know how to change one little facet of yourself to be more like who you want to be. You know how to help one person in one little way - then another, then another. Baby steps, all the time, every day. You don't have to wake up and suddenly be where you want to be, all you have to do is start moving just a little bit in that direction, and then move a little more, and a little more. It's in movement that you can find yourself as the person you want to become, not in the stillness once the becoming is over. I am working on this one myself.

    As an INFP you can be all those things you want to be - clever, tough, adventurous, brave, quick-witted, persuasive, and in control. You just will have to be them in your own INFP way. A clever INFP would probably be literate and witty. A tough INFP would probably be decisive and stand their moral ground. An adventurous INFP (I have a close friend who I believe is an adventurous INFP, by the way -) would probably be (she is) creative, exploratory, and flexible. A brave INFP would probably be ready to speak up against injustice. A quick-witted INFP would probably have that snarky dark sense of humor. A persuasive INFP would probably tug at others on an emotional and value-based level. An in-control INFP would know what she wants and be relentless about pursuing it.

    You will never become your best self if you try to become an ENTP instead.

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