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Thread: Ask an INTJ

  1. #361
    Diving into Ni-space Crescent Fresh's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by ThatGirl View Post
    INFJ!
    May I ask why?

  2. #362
    Diving into Ni-space Crescent Fresh's Avatar
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    Actually, I've never met any INTJ in real life. That's why when I bumped into you guys online, I find it quite fascinating.

    Though I always wonder if INTJs communicate exactly the same way IRL as they tend to be not expressive of their opinions in public, based on what I read here and there?

  3. #363
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    Well it is debatable whether I am an INTJ or not, and probably most of them will say some sort of E type. I assume, since I have every or no type, that means I get to answer all threads.

    Personally I feel closest to INFJ types naturally because their Fe comes from a train of thought I can naturally follow. So they are not as imposing on an emotional level than other types can be. Also, they are kind of like little Pokemon. I am not sure I should explain this out loud. Lol.



    By the way. I am an XNtJ. So not your typical.

  4. #364
    Senior Member Nicodemus's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Crescent Fresh View Post
    INFP, INFJ, ENFJ or ENFP?
    My answer depends on what your question is. Assuming the underdetermination is part of the game, I am going to go with 'Which of these types do you like best?', thereby appearing to be a nice rather than a nasty person, who would probably answer to something like 'Which of these types is most likely to lose in a fight against a windmill?'.

    I confess that I have taken an irrational liking to INFJs. But since I am asked to answer which type I like best, as opposed to what type is best, I am not bound to objective criteria or even coherence. Thus: INFJ > ENFP > INFP > ENFJ.

  5. #365
    Diving into Ni-space Crescent Fresh's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Nicodemus View Post
    My answer depends on what your question is. Assuming the underdetermination is part of the game, I am going to go with 'Which of these types do you like best?', thereby appearing to be a nice rather than a nasty person, who would probably answer to something like 'Which of these types is most likely to lose in a fight against a windmill?'.

    I confess that I have taken an irrational liking to INFJs. But since I am asked to answer which type I like best, as opposed to what type is best, I am not bound to objective criteria or even coherence. Thus: INFJ > ENFP > INFP > ENFJ.

    I like it how INTJ is great at deductive thinking.

    Then what are the difference between INTJ and ENTP? I'm pretty new to the NT scene so I would like to know more about you guys.

  6. #366
    Senior Member Nicodemus's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Crescent Fresh View Post
    Then what are the difference between INTJ and ENTP?
    We amuse in different ways: ENTPs are, all and sundry, clowns; INTJs are puppeteers.

    Yes, I am not going to answer seriously, because I suspect there are threads about this topic already.

  7. #367
    this is my winter song EJCC's Avatar
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    I have a question about an INTJ that I'm friends with.

    For almost the entire time I've known her, she has readily shared very personal information with me, in a nonchalant way, and she has almost never talked about the cool things (or cool people) in her life. I'm not sure if it's because she's comfortable with opening up to me, or because it's her way of coping with life's problems? I honestly don't even know if it's type-related. But I was curious as to what you INTJs (and people who know INTJs well) think about it.

    Example of the sort of situation I'm thinking of: I contacted her for the first time in several months yesterday, and when I asked her how she was doing, literally the first thing she mentioned was the fact that she might not get enough financial aid to return to college next year. I asked her if her parents could help, and she told me that her mom had given up on her business (because it had stopped earning money), and her dad was in the middle of a court battle regarding a job he'd been fired from, so he had been literally banned from seeking employment for over a year. My INTJ friend didn't say any of this in a very upset way, which made me a little uncomfortable; I would know how to react if she was upset, but I didn't even know if she was! She would have to be, right? But I did my best to respond accordingly, and I think she was happy with how I reacted to the news.

    The next day, she texted me to say that it was confirmed that she wouldn't get enough financial aid. I sent her a Skype message about how those jerks didn't deserve her anyway, and she could do fine without college (since she's already an incredibly talented artist). She didn't even respond to that comment, and instead said "Have you heard the news??" I immediately thought it was some positive development regarding the financial aid situation. But it turns out that she had totaled her car, the same day that she had gotten that terrible news! She sent me a photo of it, too. And again, the whole time, she was perfectly nonchalant and matter-of-fact. It was almost like she was enjoying telling me about it. She told me later in that same conversation that she was determined to apply again after a semester back at home (in the hopes that the school would reconsider her financial situation), and that she "wouldn't give up that easily". So that might explain her non-upset mood? But I don't understand, still.

    The reason why I'm so confused is that my reactions to bad news are so different from that. If I get terrible news about something, I will tell absolutely no one. I will withdraw and deal with things on my own, maybe only telling my one or two closest friends (and even then, I'll tell them several days after the fact, instead of right away). Often I'll instinctively (and without realizing it) stop contacting the outside world -- no Facebook status updates, no texts to friends and family with cool facts or fun news -- and the only way people get the information out of me is by asking me what's wrong. And if the news is really bad, I might refuse to give people the news over the phone or in person, because I don't want to cry in front of them.

    So, needless to say, the idea that my INTJ friend would contact me on the very day these terrible things have happened to her -- me! not even a terribly close friend of hers! -- confuses me to no end. Do you guys have any insights? Is this type-related, at all?
    ~ g e t f e s t i v e ! ~


    EJCC: "The Big Questions in my life right now: 1) What am I willing to live with? 2) What do I have to live with? 3) What can I change for the better?"
    Coriolis: "Is that the ESTJ Serenity Prayer?"



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  8. #368
    Senior Member Nicodemus's Avatar
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    I can tell you my thoughts on the matter, but not how much of it is type-related.

    Quote Originally Posted by EJCC View Post
    Example of the sort of situation I'm thinking of: I contacted her for the first time in several months yesterday, and when I asked her how she was doing, literally the first thing she mentioned was the fact that she might not get enough financial aid to return to college next year. I asked her if her parents could help, and she told me that her mom had given up on her business (because it had stopped earning money), and her dad was in the middle of a court battle regarding a job he'd been fired from, so he had been literally banned from seeking employment for over a year. My INTJ friend didn't say any of this in a very upset way, which made me a little uncomfortable; I would know how to react if she was upset, but I didn't even know if she was! She would have to be, right? But I did my best to respond accordingly, and I think she was happy with how I reacted to the news.
    It is unfortunate for her and it probably upsets her that she cannot do anything about it, but the reason why she can easily talk about it with you is that she does not consider it intimate or even really personal information. These are simple facts about her current situation. It is also the answer to your question - and, which I think is typical, not a description of her feelings regarding the situation (how she is doing) but just the situation itself (how the world around her is doing).

    Quote Originally Posted by EJCC View Post
    The next day, she texted me to say that it was confirmed that she wouldn't get enough financial aid. I sent her a Skype message about how those jerks didn't deserve her anyway, and she could do fine without college (since she's already an incredibly talented artist). She didn't even respond to that comment
    We talked about compliments on Vent last Friday. Apparently some like receiving compliments, others not so much.

    Quote Originally Posted by EJCC View Post
    [...] and instead said "Have you heard the news??" I immediately thought it was some positive development regarding the financial aid situation. But it turns out that she had totaled her car, the same day that she had gotten that terrible news! She sent me a photo of it, too. And again, the whole time, she was perfectly nonchalant and matter-of-fact. It was almost like she was enjoying telling me about it. She told me later in that same conversation that she was determined to apply again after a semester back at home (in the hopes that the school would reconsider her financial situation), and that she "wouldn't give up that easily". So that might explain her non-upset mood? But I don't understand, still.
    I once rode home on my bike when it began raining heavily. Shortly after it had started I was soaked. So I dismounted and walked home - embracing the absurdity. That may be one part of the explanation for her reaction. The other, I guess, is that by telling you about it, she is in fact coping with it such that by sharing the information, the truth of it becomes real. If she tells you, it is on the table and no longer just in her head.

    Quote Originally Posted by EJCC View Post
    The reason why I'm so confused is that my reactions to bad news are so different from that. If I get terrible news about something, I will tell absolutely no one. I will withdraw and deal with things on my own, maybe only telling my one or two closest friends (and even then, I'll tell them several days after the fact, instead of right away). Often I'll instinctively (and without realizing it) stop contacting the outside world -- no Facebook status updates, no texts to friends and family with cool facts or fun news -- and the only way people get the information out of me is by asking me what's wrong. And if the news is really bad, I might refuse to give people the news over the phone or in person, because I don't want to cry in front of them.
    Since the news are not about any failure of hers but rather about the hardships she has to endure (and will eventually overcome), it is not difficult for her to talk about them. Perhaps she would like a compliment on how well she is holding up.

  9. #369
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    Ah, the classical problem: My INTJ is frank and open open with the facts which I might find private but they don't share any emotions at all! Are they broken?

    In short, no, they are INTJ.

  10. #370
    Senior Member INTPness's Avatar
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    She's ESTJ. I'm guessing she's not overly concerned with the emotions of it.
    NTJ's are the only types that have ever made me feel emo.
    ENP's are the only types that have ever made me feel like a sensor.


    There are two great days in a person's life - the day we are born and the day we discover why. --William Barclay

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