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  1. #41
    Xena's boyfriend Bardsandwarriors's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by greenfairy View Post
    remove the causes by changing my negative beliefs and adopting a philosophical attitude.
    This jumps out at me. Are your negative beliefs (about yourself) causing the crying sessions in the toilet?

    Or do you think it is something coming from other people?
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    Neutral good Fi-ENFp 4w3 sp/so 479 gentle spirit, 50yo male. Travels the land seeking a good sig line.

  2. #42
    philosopher wood nymph greenfairy's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Bardsandwarriors View Post
    This jumps out at me. Are your negative beliefs (about yourself) causing the crying sessions in the toilet?

    Or do you think it is something coming from other people?
    Yes, it's entirely me (although I could blame my parents, but ultimately I have responsibility for my own thoughts). And I know it's irrational. They're not conscious beliefs, although in the grip of emotion it's hard for me to see that they aren't true. I guess everything comes to perfectionism- because if I fail, then I can't be self sufficient, which means I'm not competent, which means I'm dependent on others, which means I wouldn't survive in the natural environment, which means my genes are inferior. Haha it sounds kind of funny when I put it like that, but that's kind of what goes through my head.

  3. #43
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    Quote Originally Posted by greenfairy View Post
    if I fail, then I can't be self sufficient, which means I'm not competent, which means I'm dependent on others, which means I wouldn't survive in the natural environment, which means my genes are inferior
    This is so cute! It sounds exactly like a little, cute, childish Ti. I wonder what ISTPs would say about this. Do u think that might be interesting enough to ask?

  4. #44
    Analytical Dreamer Coriolis's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by greenfairy View Post
    Ah, so you must not have a lot of negative judgment about yourself. Sometimes paranoia will say "and if these things are true, then this worse thing is true, etc...which means I'm a failure, which means I am bad/worthless."
    I have negative judgments, but they are mostly productive, showing me something I need to improve on or do better at.
    I've been called a criminal, a terrorist, and a threat to the known universe. But everything you were told is a lie. The truth is, they've taken our freedom, our home, and our future. The time has come for all humanity to take a stand...

  5. #45
    Xena's boyfriend Bardsandwarriors's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by greenfairy View Post
    Yes, it's entirely me (although I could blame my parents, but ultimately I have responsibility for my own thoughts). And I know it's irrational. They're not conscious beliefs, although in the grip of emotion it's hard for me to see that they aren't true. I guess everything comes to perfectionism- because if I fail, then
    etc

    Bingo Parents pushing you to do everything perfectly?

    Yet your reaction is an emotional one, wanting their approval, not wanting to be criticised.

    If you've left home and you are growing up, you don't need their approval now, and you don't have to be perfect. You only have to do your best, and keep improving. That's the best anyone can ask, of anyone.
    Status: was , then , now
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  6. #46
    Xena's boyfriend Bardsandwarriors's Avatar
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    PS. That's not a platitude. It's a fact. Tell yourself that, in the toilet.
    Status: was , then , now
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  7. #47
    philosopher wood nymph greenfairy's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Istbkleta View Post
    This is so cute! It sounds exactly like a little, cute, childish Ti. I wonder what ISTPs would say about this. Do u think that might be interesting enough to ask?
    Haha. So Ti overreacting and causing problems, along with Ni generating dreadful possibilities- why ISTP's?

    Quote Originally Posted by Coriolis View Post
    I have negative judgments, but they are mostly productive, showing me something I need to improve on or do better at.
    Which means they're rational. Lucky.

    Quote Originally Posted by Bardsandwarriors View Post
    etc

    Bingo Parents pushing you to do everything perfectly?

    Yet your reaction is an emotional one, wanting their approval, not wanting to be criticised.

    If you've left home and you are growing up, you don't need their approval now, and you don't have to be perfect. You only have to do your best, and keep improving. That's the best anyone can ask, of anyone.
    Yeah yeah, true. I do need to tell myself this over and over.

    And even if I was incompetent at a lot of things and temporarily dependent, it wouldn't do any good to beat myself up over it and have low self esteem. I've been telling myself this over and over, but it still hasn't sunk in. But I've had more success at work since adopting a more positive attitude.

  8. #48
    Xena's boyfriend Bardsandwarriors's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by greenfairy View Post
    Yeah yeah, true. I do need to tell myself this over and over.

    And even if I was incompetent at a lot of things and temporarily dependent, it wouldn't do any good to beat myself up over it and have low self esteem. I've been telling myself this over and over, but it still hasn't sunk in. But I've had more success at work since adopting a more positive attitude.
    Humans are social animals. Hardly anyone who ever lived would survive alone in the natural world. As a social animal, you only have to fit into a social niche where you function well and are appreciated. That's why people pay you money!

    In terms of functions, I'm not sure how this plays out. I'm here to learn this stuff. but - maybe your Ti isn't properly taking account of the social nature of life?

    Anyhow, you asked for NT replies. So I'm kind of out of place here, and I'd better let the rationals back in.
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  9. #49
    philosopher wood nymph greenfairy's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Bardsandwarriors View Post
    Humans are social animals. Hardly anyone who ever lived would survive alone in the natural world. As a social animal, you only have to fit into a social niche where you function well and are appreciated. That's why people pay you money!

    In terms of functions, I'm not sure how this plays out. I'm here to learn this stuff. but - maybe your Ti isn't properly taking account of the social nature of life?

    Anyhow, you asked for NT replies. So I'm kind of out of place here, and I'd better let the rationals back in.


    Np; I wasn't saying only NT's, I just specified them because I thought they would have the niftiest tricks for temporary functionality. Perhaps it's just something you;re born with though. Or maybe the NF's would do it better, because they're used to accepting their feelings and stuff.

  10. #50
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    Quote Originally Posted by greenfairy View Post
    Haha. So Ti overreacting and causing problems, along with Ni generating dreadful possibilities- why ISTP's?

    'Cause we are 1337 at maintaining composure, and the ultimate wielders of Ti.

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