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  1. #31
    right on the left wing Philosorapteuse's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by nebbykoo View Post
    Sometimes people make things into questions when they aren't? By lifting their voice at the end of the sentence?

    Yes, it happens, and is also useless. ?
    Sounds like the Brummie Whine to me.
    "A great many people think they are thinking when they are merely rearranging their prejudices." --William James

    I'd be a card-carrying sensotard, but I can't find the goddamn card.

  2. #32
    right on the left wing Philosorapteuse's Avatar
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    I dunno. I might take you very slightly less seriously if you punctuate every sentence with "like", but it's the inflection that irritates me more than the word itself. Saying "Yahh" instead of "yeah" annoys me though. Which is unreasonable as that's probably a regional thing, but it makes me think of Sloaney girls in pashminas and ludicrous oversized sunglasses. We've all got verbal tics though. One of mine is appending "If that makes sense" to everything. I had no idea I did this until my mum told me, in very restrained tones, that it *did* make sense and wasn't bizarre enough a statement to warrent the question...
    "A great many people think they are thinking when they are merely rearranging their prejudices." --William James

    I'd be a card-carrying sensotard, but I can't find the goddamn card.

  3. #33
    Senior Member JivinJeffJones's Avatar
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    Written down they're a little annoying. Conversationally though they have their purpose. I met an expat South African lady (living in Australia) who told me she was perceived as a bossy know-it-all who was intolerant of dissenting opinions. People were under the impression that her opinions were expressed in a manner strongly suggesting "This is exactly how it is. I'm 100% confident of this opinion so that's the end of the conversation." Since she didn't feel like this fairly reflected her attitude she dug a little deeper and found that it was simply her speech patterns as a native Afrikaans speaker. So she had to teach herself things like ending sentences on an upward intonation, and adding "know what I mean" etc. After that she had a lot less trouble with being misunderstood.

    So yeah these sayings are more about modifying connection than modifying meaning. If you don't want to use them then don't use them, but don't be surprised if people you talk to unaccountably find you a bit of a prat.

  4. #34
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    Quote Originally Posted by Rasofy View Post
    I used to say the equivalent of ''like'' and ''you know'' a lot, but I guess I was mostly adapting to the audience.

    Since I left college I sort of stopped using those.

  5. #35
    As Long As It Takes.... Redbone's Avatar
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    I do it. Very guilty of "I know, right?" and "I'm hearing you." I try to tone it down depending on who I'm talking with...sometimes. Hell, I don't know.

    English has been and always will be a mangled language...no quitting allowed at this late date.

  6. #36
    Nips away your dignity Fluffywolf's Avatar
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    Sometimes expressively in jest, other times with contextual meaning.

    There are as many ways one can convey a message, but there are at least as many ways someone else can interpret that message. Communication is a two way process. Useless words, not always useless.
    ~Self-depricating Megalomaniacal Superwolf

  7. #37
    Away with the fairies Southern Kross's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by JivinJeffJones View Post
    Written down they're a little annoying. Conversationally though they have their purpose. I met an expat South African lady (living in Australia) who told me she was perceived as a bossy know-it-all who was intolerant of dissenting opinions. People were under the impression that her opinions were expressed in a manner strongly suggesting "This is exactly how it is. I'm 100% confident of this opinion so that's the end of the conversation." Since she didn't feel like this fairly reflected her attitude she dug a little deeper and found that it was simply her speech patterns as a native Afrikaans speaker. So she had to teach herself things like ending sentences on an upward intonation, and adding "know what I mean" etc. After that she had a lot less trouble with being misunderstood.

    So yeah these sayings are more about modifying connection than modifying meaning. If you don't want to use them then don't use them, but don't be surprised if people you talk to unaccountably find you a bit of a prat.
    Yeah, this is exactly the sort of things I'm talking about. They can be social lubricant.

    BTW my Mum is having problems with her South African migrant bosses right now for similar reasons. Those South Africans are very blunt and assertive people. Not that I blame them for being that way; it's a cultural misunderstanding. I don't think they realise how that comes across in the laid-back, chummy environment of antipodean culture.
    INFP 4w5 so/sp

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    they've gone through and through me, like wine through water, and altered the colour of my mind.

    - Emily Bronte

  8. #38
    Lay the coin on my tongue SilkRoad's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by nebbykoo View Post
    I hear it less these days, but lots of young(er) people still do it?

    Yes, yes they do.

    Might be a West coast phenomenon.
    I think it's partly West Coast. Although Canadians do it quite widely, I think. I don't do it too much unless I'm having a very Canadian moment. But I've met other West Coast Canadian girls who were much more raised-ends-of-sentences and chirpy (in a rather annoying way...) than me. I've got a deep voice so I'm more...draaaaaawwwwwllllll.
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  9. #39
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    Quote Originally Posted by Typoz View Post
    I have noticed that INTPs don't have a problem with them and use them themselves... So far anyway.

    I actually thought that this was either an NT thing or even an NTP thing - disliking such words. INTPs are said to deconstruct things to details, which is what this is - noticing lingual inconsistencies. It seems like I've been wrong.
    I think a P in general is more likely to be open minded, and see that something can have value, even if it isn't perfect.

    In my life, I do a lot of telephone selling. There, it's very important to constantly let people know you are listening, so I am constantly saying things like "that's great", "absolutely", "uh huh", "I see what you mean", etc. Maybe they are "useless" strictly from the point of view of conveying a fact. However they are useful in order to build a rapport with the other person.

    Even when writing, somebody may wish to engage their audience, with some tangents, some...like...connecting words, to make the text seem more, kind of, conversational, I guess.

    SEE WHAT I DID THERE

    Ok so kind of an exaggerated example (and again), but you see my point. It depends on my audience and on the effect one wishes to convey.


  10. #40
    Away with the fairies Southern Kross's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by SilkRoad View Post
    But I've met other West Coast Canadian girls who were much more raised-ends-of-sentences and chirpy (in a rather annoying way...) than me.
    Don't ever come to NZ.
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    I've dreamt in my life dreams that have stayed with me ever after, and changed my ideas;
    they've gone through and through me, like wine through water, and altered the colour of my mind.

    - Emily Bronte

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