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Thread: Do NFs and NTs get along?

  1. #11
    Banned Array
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    Oct 2011
    1w9 sp/sx


    I think it depends on the individual person (I don't think it's type related a all). My younger brother is an ENFP and we've pretty much been best friends ever since we were very young. However, one of my "friends" is also an ENFP and he is a complete jerk to me all the time (he's a jerk in general, but even more so with me than anyone else). So it really depends on the individual person, not their type.

  2. #12
    Anew Leaf


    Just looking at me as an NF versus the NT types:

    ENTJ: I get along quite well with this type. There can often be some initial frustration in trying to mesh up with this very strong personality. Once I figure out what their "language" is, then it gets a lot easier for me. The main importance I have discovered with this type is that above all they respect and desire the unvarnished truth. If I am upset with them, they just want to know so we can deal with it. They often show their own respect for you by simply giving you the truth as they see it without sugarcoating or apologies. I think they often get misconstrued for being cruel for doing this. However, I personally would rather have the reality so that I have the information to face it instead of encouragement for me to escape into fantasy land once more.

    ENTJs have quite a tough candy shell on the outside but inside there is a lovely gooey center of caring. If they are your friend or loved one, they are extremely loyal and protective.

    As an Fi-dom I think the reason why I am able to connect so well with this type is because we speak the same language of Fi and Te. The N/S differences end up dovetailing quite nicely with each other, and we often both delight at the different way of seeing the world.

    INTJs: My description to the ENTJ is quite similar to my interactions with this type, so I am not going to go as in depth here. The main differences are that ENTJs have a very strong forceful aura to them, and the INTJs are much softer and quieter.

    INTJs take more time and patience to get to know, but are often extremely worthwhile for that wait. I find that once I have gained their trust, it's a wonderful friendship to enjoy. I am fortunate enough to have several INTJs in my life as friends and they are some of my strongest supporters. Two of them live out of state and they have both vocalized their ability to fly out if I needed them there in person for something. It always feels like no problem is ever too large to bring to them to get their input on.

    Like the ENTJ there is a hard candy outer shell, with a delicious caramel center to discover. There is again that commonality with the Fi and Te that is an easy language to have in common. The N/S differences again feel like dovetailing different strengths rather than being in the way.

    NTJ Overall: I find that these are types that I can be my best with and find that it enhances our friendship nicely. I get to be kind of silly/fanciful/imaginative, and these types will appreciate me for it. Similarly I appreciate their own imaginative self, their desire to be objective, and their ability to perceive the unperceivable. I often feel like I am a better person for having some of these types in my life because they allow me to be me but they balance me at the same time.

    ENTPs: I find that in friendships, this is a really fun type of friend to have. I get to be extra silly and delve into the Ne ping pong that is so delightful to indulge in every now and again. I find that there are two types of ENTPs, the ones that want to be entertaining for the fun of all, and the ones who want to be entertaining for themselves. I enjoy the former a lot more than the latter. I have many ENTP friends and family simply because I am an NTP magnet. (I really need to stop chewing on wires. )

    I think the problem where things can break down is that where we are similar, we are too similiar. Ne is, for me, my go-to gal of humor and silliness. Ne for ENTPs is similiar to a point where their Ti kicks in and goes "ok, this is too illogical we must stop" and that's about the point where I am just getting started having fun.

    I think the second kind of ENTP can really wear on my nerves after awhile. Pranks and jokes are fun, but when they start bordering on mean, I don't like it anymore. And often when I have objected at that point, they play around with semantics to show me how I am wrong for being upset. That gets old.

    INTPs: Very similar interactions to the ENTP so this description will be shorter. I think the problem again can be that we are SO similar, that when the differences crop up there is a bit of a shock. Ne, being the external easily verbalized form of our thoughts, can make it look like we are on the same wave lengths for a very long time. Then there comes a day when Ti and Fi have made their own separate opinions and boom! the end of the world has arrived.

    I also find that NTPs have a very hard time reading my emotional state since I am not easily expressing of such things... and they take such stoicism as meaning I feel nothing. This causes problems quite quickly, even in friendships.

    The End.

  3. #13
    Senior Member Array INTP's Avatar
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    Jul 2009
    5w4 sx


    Quote Originally Posted by Saturned View Post
    I also find that NTPs have a very hard time reading my emotional state since I am not easily expressing of such things... and they take such stoicism as meaning I feel nothing. This causes problems quite quickly, even in friendships.
    are you sure that they dont just see your emotional state as not being a problem(you feel crap, but you want to be doing something than dwelling on those problems and have no problem doing so) or think that you just dont want to talk about it, since you are not expressing it? what i have noticed about NFPs around me is that they either express their emotions, or often deny it(and get more anxious for having to deny it) even if i can clearly see that something is wrong and ask. so not asking, even if i see that something is wrong seems to be the best option. if you want to express something, guess what you have to do
    "Where wisdom reigns, there is no conflict between thinking and feeling."
    — C.G. Jung


  4. #14


    I like NF's. Their ideology can be stifling, but sometimes I'm into that kinda thing

  5. #15
    Alchemist of life Array Coriolis's Avatar
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    Apr 2010
    5w6 sp/sx


    Quote Originally Posted by Grublet View Post
    Being an ENFP, I'm always initially attracted to INTJs because we're both Tes. The problem is that I quickly tire of them because their Te is secondary and lead by Ni while my Te is tertiary and lead by Fi. So while we're both intuitive, when I collect and analyze data I think about the personal or societal implications, whereas an NT will consider the practical applications.

    Just wondering what you other Idealists and Rationals had to say about this.
    Do NTs/NFs (or ENFP/INTJ) get along?

    Short answer: some do, some don't.

    Long answer: read this. ENFP/INTJ Rabbit Hole of No Return
    Hope is the denial of reality. It is the carrot dangled before the draft horse to keep him plodding along in a vain attempt to reach it. We should remove the carrot and walk forward with our eyes open. -- Raistlin Majere

  6. #16
    4x9 Array cascadeco's Avatar
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    Oct 2007
    4 so/sp


    I think it's really about both people being perfectly ok with how the other is. So, the NF can't 'expect' the NT to be NF, and the NT can't 'expect the NF to be or become more NT-ish. Also, both need to learn not to project their own self/values/'what would I do' onto the other, as there are inherent differences. And as long as both are ok and appreciate the differences, then all is jolly!

    (of course the above could apply to any relationship)
    "...On and on and on and on he strode, far out over the sands, singing wildly to the sea, crying to greet the advent of the life that had cried to him." - James Joyce

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  7. #17
    Was E.laur Array Laurie's Avatar
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    Jan 2009


    I think everyone should have answered "No."

  8. #18
    i love Array skylights's Avatar
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    Jul 2010
    6w7 so/sx
    EII Ne



    But srsly exactly what @cascadeco said... Since we share Perception style, it's really up to how we handle our Judgment that determines how well we will or will not get along. If we can find a pleasing Fe-Ti or Fi-Te balance, or if we can see similarities in Fi-Ti and Fe-Te, then we will probably get along very well. But we can also easily find the other lacking - NTs thinking NFs too tied up in morals to be progressive and NFs thinking NTs too focused on hard logic to be empathetic.

  9. #19


    The few enfps I've met I like well enough, I was in a relationship with an enfp man, and while he was delightful in some ways we never really made anything other than a superficial connection and that exasperated me. I was always trying ti find more and there wasn't anything else to find.

  10. #20
    FRACTALICIOUS Array phobik's Avatar
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    Apr 2009


    To avoid criticism, do nothing, say nothing, be nothing.
    ~ Elbert Hubbard

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