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  1. #51
    The Black Knight Domino's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Cypocalypse View Post
    Anyway, I think I have a sort of a FETISH for healthy INFPs. My ISFJ girlfriend , not to demean her in any way, doesn't have the intellectual competence to analyze or read through me as much as I am self-critical. She's just to busy in her personal life (work, etc.)

    Ok, dude, was THAT helpful?? Seriously. Listen what you just said. You backseated your ISFJ.
    eNFJ 4w3 sx/so 468 tritype
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  2. #52
    Senior Member Cypocalypse's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Jennifer View Post
    np...

    I'm not sure about INFP/INTP pairings. They tend to be very decent friends because they operate similarly externally (they love to bounce Ne ideas off each other -- the NF offers sympathy and gives emotional affirmation, the NT is forthright and blunt and offers clarity)... but the Ti can clash with the Fi badly depending on the situation and specific beliefs.

    INTPs unfortunately aren't continual "white knights," because of their desire for personal space and individual autonomy. When the situation demands it and they perceive a problem, they can leap in and save the day... again, IF they think it's important enough. Good at resolving catastrophes, bad at little daily things.

    They're more apt to look at a damsel in distress, if she's in a long-term distress, and say, "Well, can't you save yourself?" Just not very good originally at maintenance activities...

    ISFJ women, on the other hand, excel at maintenance but feel slighted if nothing is ever really returned.
    Do we share a soul or something? You're extracting my sentiments with 100% accuracy. LOL!

  3. #53
    Senior Member Cypocalypse's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by PinkPiranha View Post
    Ok, dude, was THAT helpful?? Seriously. Listen what you just said. You backseated your ISFJ.
    On the other hand, her other merits outweigh that, that's just the single issue that I can think of that can potentially affect the relationship in the long run. In every other aspect, the relationship is essentially solid.

    Ever since I wanted to have a good relationship, my primary consideration is stability and she provided that really damn well. That alone is pretty much sufficient in keeping the relationship, in my opinion. I was just being honest about some of the minor drawbacks.

  4. #54
    The Black Knight Domino's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Cypocalypse View Post
    On the other hand, her other merits outweigh that, that's just the single issue that I can think of that can potentially affect the relationship in the long run. In every other aspect, the relationship is essentially solid.

    Ever since I wanted to have a good relationship, my primary consideration is stability and she provided that really damn well. That alone is pretty much sufficient in keeping the relationship, in my opinion. I was just being honest about some of the minor drawbacks.
    I find that debatable. Saying you have a fetish for INFPs in a thread where an INFP chick is grappling with not doing the wrong thing with an INTP??

    Come on.

    Then saying your ISFJ isn't your mental equal/depth? I gotta problem with INTPs on that count. A huge one. ISFJs don't deserve that kind of half-way treatment. Giving tippy INTPs training wheels hardly capitalizes on the ISFJs best traits. Nothing I like better than seeing an un-utilized ISFJ wise up and get herself an ESTP/ISTP boyfriend who gives her the magic she needs and doesn't "weigh her merits".
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  5. #55
    @.~*virinaĉo*~.@ Totenkindly's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Cypocalypse View Post
    Do we share a soul or something? You're extracting my sentiments with 100% accuracy. LOL!
    Bwa ha ha... Yes, I found your secret diary.

    Gee, first the X-Men, now this... Freaky, huh?

    Quote Originally Posted by PinkPiranha View Post
    Then saying your ISFJ isn't your mental equal/depth? I gotta problem with INTPs on that count. A huge one. ISFJs don't deserve that kind of half-way treatment. Giving tippy INTPs training wheels hardly capitalizes on the ISFJs best traits. Nothing I like better than seeing an un-utilized ISFJ wise up and get herself an ESTP/ISTP boyfriend who gives her the magic she needs and doesn't "weigh her merits".
    Well... I did understand what he meant, and I see both your points.

    (ISFJs and INTPs can both have the same IQ. But ISFJs usually don't care to go where the INTP wants to, or perceiving the intuitive nuances. They tend to be literal.

    If you'd like, you could balance it by saying the INTP is clueless or apathetic towards more linear math/logic that the ISFJ finds relevant.

    INTPs = strong in abstract thought, ISFJs = strong in relevant relationship)

    Where I agree with you is that he was writing off Miss ISFJ rather than including her anyway in his thought process... even if the chances are good she wouldn't care to delve too far into them. In a relationship, you still make the offer rather than excluding the other person by default. So she did get backseated.

    I'll move this part of the conversation if people want to continue it...it's getting a little bit away from the INTP/INFP flirting.
    "Hey Capa -- We're only stardust." ~ "Sunshine"

    “Pleasure to me is wonder—the unexplored, the unexpected, the thing that is hidden and the changeless thing that lurks behind superficial mutability. To trace the remote in the immediate; the eternal in the ephemeral; the past in the present; the infinite in the finite; these are to me the springs of delight and beauty.” ~ H.P. Lovecraft

  6. #56
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    Quote Originally Posted by Jennifer View Post
    np...

    I'm not sure about INFP/INTP pairings. They tend to be very decent friends because they operate similarly externally (they love to bounce Ne ideas off each other -- the NF offers sympathy and gives emotional affirmation, the NT is forthright and blunt and offers clarity)... but the Ti can clash with the Fi badly depending on the situation and specific beliefs.

    INTPs unfortunately aren't continual "white knights," because of their desire for personal space and individual autonomy. When the situation demands it and they perceive a problem, they can leap in and save the day... again, IF they think it's important enough. Good at resolving catastrophes, bad at little daily things.

    They're more apt to look at a damsel in distress, if she's in a long-term distress, and say, "Well, can't you save yourself?" Just not very good originally at maintenance activities...

    ISFJ women, on the other hand, excel at maintenance but feel slighted if nothing is ever really returned.
    So... if an INTP is looking for emotional/mental/NF on the outside, then it is possibly a lacking from the "stability" at home? It sounds to me therefore, that INTPs like to be taken care of - by someone who depends on them - but who still can operate within their own worlds as well providing the thus needed autonomy. Guys/girls searching on the outside are then looking for their cake and eating it to n'est pas?

    So I hear from these sentiments here that the NF/NT pairings are not so ideal for the INTP? -

  7. #57
    Senior Member Cypocalypse's Avatar
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    Sometimes, I just play the devil's advocate here--devil's advocate to my beliefs. Ne thing basically.

    To some readers here it may appear overblown, so I'm sorry for that if I've created the wrong impression. I don't want to create the impression that my girlfriend is dumb whatsoever, but I'm just not in the mood right now to double check everything I write to make it appear politically correct in every sense.

    Truth is, I can empathize a bit with the disposition of the creator of this thread, so that's probably one of the reasons why I don't double check what I write for the meantime and I just explain the other facets of the possible truth, but I sincerely don't have any intentions of overblowing anything. Really.

  8. #58
    Senior Member Cypocalypse's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by treeleaning View Post
    So... if an INTP is looking for emotional/mental/NF on the outside, then it is possibly a lacking from the "stability" at home? It sounds to me therefore, that INTPs like to be taken care of - by someone who depends on them - but who still can operate within their own worlds as well providing the thus needed autonomy. Guys/girls searching on the outside are then looking for their cake and eating it to n'est pas?

    So I hear from these sentiments here that the NF/NT pairings are not so ideal for the INTP? -
    I don't know for sure yet how an INTP/INFP relationship would pan out since I never had an INFP girlfriend, but quite a few friends.

    Though for one, by default, I like an ISFJ's household know-how since I'm pathetic with regard to that. LOL!

    It's just that there's something near-divine in some INFPs and the way they extract something from my subconscious that I thought the Ti already eradicated. LOL!

    Jennifer is right. They make excellent friends. That's something i can confirm.

  9. #59
    The Black Knight Domino's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Cypocalypse View Post
    I'm just not in the mood right now to double check everything I write to make it appear politically correct in every sense.
    Thanks for basement-ing the critical thinking skills of the thread posters. 'Preciate it.
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  10. #60
    @.~*virinaĉo*~.@ Totenkindly's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by treeleaning View Post
    So... if an INTP is looking for emotional/mental/NF on the outside, then it is possibly a lacking from the "stability" at home? It sounds to me therefore, that INTPs like to be taken care of - by someone who depends on them - but who still can operate within their own worlds as well providing the thus needed autonomy. Guys/girls searching on the outside are then looking for their cake and eating it to n'est pas?
    No, I didn't mean that at all... depending on how we define "stability."

    (And please note that while I am describing tendencies in types... and the probable syncs/pitfalls... I can't speak for a particular individual like your friend, this is all just theoretical framing.)

    His homelife can be stable in the sense the bills are paid, the clothes are washed, the meals are cooked, there is a schedule, he has a safe room all to himself, etc. And his wife could be very consistent in their interactions. Everything is predictable.

    However, in a situation like that, I can imagine he would still be... bored. Because she's so interested in the tangibles that he can't share anything about the abstractions. There's also not a lot of mystery, usually. Or "ambiguous space" where the unexpected could happen. He doesn't really want the unexpected to happen in the daily routine, he just wants it to happen in the INTANGIBLE parts of the relationship.

    But ISFJs tend to focus on roles and expectations, as defining the relationship. She usually wants everything spelled out. She wants to know what to do in a particular situation. He's probably not really resonating with that or happy with that as the pinnacle.

    So when some woman comes along who seems imaginative, and slightly quirky/unpredictable/mysterious, and able to follow what he's saying and even push him a bit ahead of himself....well, there is a zap or connection there, he gets a jolt off it.

    So I hear from these sentiments here that the NF/NT pairings are not so ideal for the INTP? -
    I wouldn't make such a broad statement. It depends on the people in question and the specific type makeup. N's tend to do well with N's, and S's with S's. (I think it's the most significant pairing.) although obviously N's and S's can pair up and still build a happy life together. It's just easier when people share their PERCEPTION of the world, even if they process it differently.

    (And ultimately in this case, I still go with PP's assessment.... get out of there. Even if you are attracted to him. He has to resolve his marriage, either way, before anything else happens. If he can't take the responsibility to do that, getting involved with him is only going to get you hurt in the long run, along with the others who are involved; the character flaw will persist and bite you in the tushie, believe me.)
    "Hey Capa -- We're only stardust." ~ "Sunshine"

    “Pleasure to me is wonder—the unexplored, the unexpected, the thing that is hidden and the changeless thing that lurks behind superficial mutability. To trace the remote in the immediate; the eternal in the ephemeral; the past in the present; the infinite in the finite; these are to me the springs of delight and beauty.” ~ H.P. Lovecraft

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