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Thread: Common INTJ Issues

  1. #231
    ¤ Array Zarathustra's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by EclecticTeal View Post
    I'm finding this a little hard to understand, because we are usually open to new information. To be so dismissive we must assume we already have all the information needed, or possibly it is a negative/stress response when we don't think we have time to take in new information and need to go ahead and make a decision based on information already stored.

    Any thoughts?
    It could be either.

    Or both.

    Or your friend could just be a wanker.
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  2. #232
    meh Array Salomé's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by grey_beard View Post
    @Salomé

    Why do you find INTJs baffling and/or detestable?
    You summoned me into an ancient thread with THREE mentions to answer a question I covered in some depth already?

    That might have something to do with it.

    J/k. Please don't kill anyone.

    Quote Originally Posted by grey_beard View Post
    I am willing to be instructed / corrected by INTPs
    I'm willing to close my mouth & open my (not ears, since we're typing) eyes and learn...
    Have you considered that you might not be INTJ?
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  3. #233
    The Typing Tabby Array grey_beard's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Salomé View Post
    You summoned me into an ancient thread with THREE mentions to answer a question I covered in some depth already?

    That might have something to do with it.
    This is "be kind to poor n00bs week," oh @Salomé of the 10,000 posts. Thank *you* sincerely for participating.

    Quote Originally Posted by Salomé View Post
    J/k. Please don't kill anyone.
    In poor taste given recent news events in California, discussed extensively on TypC.



    Quote Originally Posted by Salomé View Post
    Have you considered that you might not be INTJ?
    Even more telling: I'm 50 and married for decades. Besides, I have college-aged progeny.
    They correct me at every opportunity, contrived or not.
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  4. #234
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    Hmmm, interesting. I can relate to these even as an ISTP, which is probably why i used to mistype as an INTJ. Not to mention my rediculously overdeveloped Ni... which seems to cause the problems.

  5. #235
    Senior Member Array captain curmudgeon's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by highlander View Post
    A lot of issues that INTJs have relate to Ni taking an overly dominant role in their personality. Some examples of this:

    Don't listen to other perspectives - At times, the INTJ can quickly dismiss things that others might say and have a tendency to come across like they think they are always right. Even if they do listen, they may not come across like they are. The explanation for much of this is that the INTJ can use Te to cut off new information rather than the more productive use of Te, which is to judge their insights against the external world.

    Overly critical - INTJs are prone to finding fault in things and situations to an excessive degree. They can tend to blame others for things that go wrong or apply judgement towards others rather than themselves.

    Don't know know how they come across to others - INTJs, especially when young can be pretty oblivious as to how they come across to other people.

    Unrealistic expectations - INTJs can have excessive expectations of others as well as themselves. Nobody measures up.

    Hard time communicating - They can have difficulty communicating what is in their mind to others. Sometimes, they are vague and cannot easily express the reasons for the way they thing.

    Occasional indecision - Though this is not usually a problem, at times the INTJ can be overwhelmed by all of the different pieces of information, scenarios and sides of an issue making it difficult to reach a decision.


    Edit: So, a lot of this is standard INTJ profile stuff. Do you agree with this? Do you see other issues? The thread is targeted at both INTJs and non-INTJs to comment on.

    I'm sure the non-INTJs should have plenty to say.
    Are you sure this is a specifically INTJ-related list? This sounds like me to a T (pun intended), and I certainly have no reason to believe that I am an INTJ.
    Jarlaxle: fact checking this thread makes me want to go all INFP on my wrists

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  6. #236

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    Quote Originally Posted by highlander View Post

    Overly critical - INTJs are prone to finding fault in things and situations to an excessive degree. They can tend to blame others for things that go wrong or apply judgement towards others rather than themselves
    I just spoke with a sweet INTJ friend of mine. While talking to her I was thinking about how she isn't how a lot of people think of INTJs. She shows me no criticism whatsoever. And shows what I would call WARMTH. I think she would show criticism if we were in a certain working relationship, maybe coworkers or something. But it would be constructive criticism.

    I bet some people think she is an infj.

  7. #237
    Happy Dancer Array uumlau's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Feline View Post
    I just spoke with a sweet INTJ friend of mine. While talking to her I was thinking about how she isn't how a lot of people think of INTJs. She shows me no criticism whatsoever. And shows what I would call WARMTH. I think she would show criticism if we were in a certain working relationship, maybe coworkers or something. But it would be constructive criticism.

    I bet some people think she is an infj.
    There are a few factors that might be in play. In general, female INTJs are more apt to learn the social skills necessary to communicate ideas without undue harshness. Similarly, older INTJs tend to be MUCH more mellow than their younger counterparts.

    Another factor I've noted in my experience is Enneagram type. INTJs are very often type 1 or type 5, both of which tend to be fairly critical. Type 6 (e.g., highlander) and Type 9 INTJs (e.g., me) tend to be much less harsh than other INTJs.

    Finally, if she's a good friend, that means you get to talk to her in an unguarded way, and INTJs are very much warmer with their close friends and family than with mere acquaintances or strangers.
    An argument is two people sharing their ignorance.

    A discussion is two people sharing their understanding, even when they disagree.

  8. #238
    Senior Member Array Rambling's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by uumlau View Post
    There are a few factors that might be in play. In general, female INTJs are more apt to learn the social skills necessary to communicate ideas without undue harshness. Similarly, older INTJs tend to be MUCH more mellow than their younger counterparts.
    Why do female INTJs learn these social skills better? I'm not asking about how it's done, nor really the obvious statement that there are plenty of social expectations of women not placed upon men...since the INTJ doesn't base decisions upon social factors at all, this must be an inner Te / Fi decision; INTJs tend to be totally able and wiling to ignore social expectations; why would female Te / Fi be more *drawn* to learn, or are they just better learners in this context?

  9. #239
    Analytical Dreamer Array Coriolis's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Rambling View Post
    Why do female INTJs learn these social skills better? I'm not asking about how it's done, nor really the obvious statement that there are plenty of social expectations of women not placed upon men...since the INTJ doesn't base decisions upon social factors at all, this must be an inner Te / Fi decision; INTJs tend to be totally able and wiling to ignore social expectations; why would female Te / Fi be more *drawn* to learn, or are they just better learners in this context?
    I wonder about this myself. I have read that INTJs (perhaps all NTs?) are the type least likely to succumb to social pressures and the expectations of others. As a female INTJ, I have certainly done very little of this.
    I've been called a criminal, a terrorist, and a threat to the known universe. But everything you were told is a lie. The truth is, they've taken our freedom, our home, and our future. The time has come for all humanity to take a stand...

  10. #240
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    Quote Originally Posted by Rambling View Post
    Why do female INTJs learn these social skills better? I'm not asking about how it's done, nor really the obvious statement that there are plenty of social expectations of women not placed upon men...since the INTJ doesn't base decisions upon social factors at all, this must be an inner Te / Fi decision; INTJs tend to be totally able and wiling to ignore social expectations; why would female Te / Fi be more *drawn* to learn, or are they just better learners in this context?
    Because maybe there are gender differences as well as personality ones, something that is constantly put down to environmental conditioning? The former has actually got a fair amount of scientific backing, more than MBTI.

    For example:
    Gender Differences in Five Factor Model Personality Traits in an Elderly Cohort: Extension of Robust and Surprising Findings to an Older Generation
    Sex Differences in the Brain: The Not So Inconvenient Truth

    I think a common INTJ issue (especially with loopy ones) is "I am right you are wrong and that's it - you will find out why eventually!" type thinking. I am guilty occasionally, but am by no means the only one who is.

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