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  1. #11
    Aquaria mrcockburn's Avatar
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    This happens to me, an I'm the opposite of INTJ. It must be a functions thing. The worst is when people attack you for standing up for yourself. It's like they want to put you in your place.

    @ThatGirl - can you elaborate more on the Third Chakra... Saw you mention it before and am curious.
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  2. #12
    Aquaria mrcockburn's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Not_Me View Post
    I don't perceive debate itself as being something negative or unfriendly. It's just interaction to me.
    Same here. I'm one of those people that will attack IDEAS and *arguments* viciously - but my opinion of the person is irrelevant and unchanging. I'm happy to go out for a drink with someone right after a bloodshedding debate on abortion.

    Don't see why people automatically bring in personal attacks into arguments over something else.
    3w4-9w1-?w6 (nearly headless nick)
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  3. #13
    Analytical Dreamer Coriolis's Avatar
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    INTJ's - do you feel you unintentionally create argument?
    Sometimes I create it on purpose.

    Quote Originally Posted by istar11 View Post
    Anybody feel this way on a regular basis? Being misunderstood, in a hostile/antagonistic way?
    When I was younger - middle school and high school - this happened quite often. Once I got to college, grad school, and work, I found myself among much more like-minded people, and it happens rarely now.
    I've been called a criminal, a terrorist, and a threat to the known universe. But everything you were told is a lie. The truth is, they've taken our freedom, our home, and our future. The time has come for all humanity to take a stand...

  4. #14
    ThatGirl
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    Quote Originally Posted by mrcockburn View Post
    This happens to me, an I'm the opposite of INTJ. It must be a functions thing. The worst is when people attack you for standing up for yourself. It's like they want to put you in your place.

    @ThatGirl - can you elaborate more on the Third Chakra... Saw you mention it before and am curious.
    No problem. The third chakra apparently deals with power, both internally, and your place in the world (how you relate and interact with your environment). Apparently when your third chakra is unbalanced, you find yourself at odds and out of sync with your environment. Your actions elicit competition and aggression rather than cooperation, which is the sign of a balanced chakra. It is about knowing how to assert your will while still remaining in harmony with your surroundings. Never asserting too much, too little, choosing your battles sort of thing. Participating in the world without being of the world, or something.

    I just read a beginner book on it, but thought it was really interesting as the chakras seem to pertain to emotional control and maturity. Sort of like the hierarchy of emotional needs. You can google it more in depth, but watch out for those hippie descriptions which are borderline delusional. Woooo! Superpowers!

  5. #15
    Member Jwill's Avatar
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    I had this problem when I was younger. As I got older, I learned how to be a little more tactful with people. Sometimes I create arguments around me on purpose, though.

  6. #16
    Senior Member uncommonentity's Avatar
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    I may unintentionally create mass hysteria, confusion and give or take a few total and utter mental breakdowns but never an argument.
    Veni, Vidi, Cessi.

  7. #17
    a scream in a vortex nanook's Avatar
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    i would ask people to consider a new perspective on a topic (or methodical approach to a problem) , and they would perceive it as an attack, because they are single-minded as in: "there can be only one perspective/approach" so they interpret my begging for another perspective to mean that their perspective is wrong, and so they feel compelled to argue, that my perspective is at least superfluous, if not wrong, and that their perspective in indispensable and so on ... it's like they are conservatively harmony seeking (harmony as in: i know it all, everything is under control) and then they have to "argue" for their weird sense of harmony. and i just have a natural desire to pierce through this kind of 'harmony'. through the conventional ways. they just bore me. at the least. but my desire is just constructive. i'm a seeker. i don't mean to destroy anything or take anything away, just add more complexity, because it's good. (i can see, how i would react to myself in just the same way. on a bad day.)

  8. #18
    Supreme High Commander Andy's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by istar11 View Post
    Hi,

    I've noticed that I often attract argumentative responses from people. Maybe I'm just inherently annoying and people just feel compelled to set me straight, but often I feel that simple remarks I make (usually commentary), provoke others to disagree with me. This has always happened with me, but I'm noticing it more and more now. I suspect it is because I come off as unintentionally authoritative on a subject (talking out of my ass?). I try to command my language precisely when around others.

    Do any INTJ's or perhaps INTP's specifically identify with this? Is this an INTX thing, at all? Do you ever get taken aback by people's responses to what you think are perfectly reasonable statements that require no further clarification or argument?

    I ask because the INTJ's in my life I have identified with, and respect in many ways. I have been tested by others (not by myself) as being INTJ, even though I self-test as an INFP. I have never thought that was right, but who knows. I know the two share some functions.

    I used to feel that I may be an INFP with Asperger's Syndrome, but I took the AQ and only scored marginally above the average (23).

    So...I guess I'm just looking for clues into my personality, and I really appreciate any help from any NT's out there.

    Anybody feel this way on a regular basis? Being misunderstood, in a hostile/antagonistic way?

    Thank you

    Luke
    I'm pretty good at avoiding arguements. Which is nice, because I hate them.
    Don't make whine out of sour grapes.

  9. #19
    Senior Member Adasta's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by goats View Post
    Usually I find NFs take things way too personally.
    We find you oddly robotic.
    That girls are raped, that two boys knife a third,
    Were axioms to him, who'd never heard
    Of any world where promises were kept,
    Or one could weep because another wept.

  10. #20
    Senior Member Adasta's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Jwill View Post
    I had this problem when I was younger. As I got older, I learned how to be a little more tactful with people. Sometimes I create arguments around me on purpose, though.
    I find INTJ arguments can go like this:

    INTJ [quizzical]: Don't you think it's X rather than Y?
    Me: No, I think Y is more accurate. It seems more accurate to me.
    INTJ [pressing]: But why?
    Me: I dunno. I just feel that it's more plausible. Both options have logical premises, so I can't dismiss them on that basis. Therefore, I choose these one for these reasons...
    INTJ [thinking]: Ok.
    Me: What do you think?
    INTJ: Well, it's difficult to say either way.

    Why were you pursuing your line of argument so aggressively if you can't actually commit to it?

    To be honest, I know why they do it, but it can be frustrating. Sometimes when an INTJ gets the bit between their teeth, I simply can't be bothered with it all. I usually steer the conversation to something more conducive to theoretical imaginings rather than "If X is not Y and Y is not Z is X Z? Hmm, not sure. Must ponder this further".
    That girls are raped, that two boys knife a third,
    Were axioms to him, who'd never heard
    Of any world where promises were kept,
    Or one could weep because another wept.

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