User Tag List

First 12345 Last

Results 21 to 30 of 47

  1. #21
    Nips away your dignity Fluffywolf's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2009
    MBTI
    INTP
    Enneagram
    9 sp/sx
    Posts
    9,422

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Oakysage View Post
    Sound great. Ey @Kirby Kill off those sweet emotions of attraction and remain good friends. Thing will go extra smooth, guaranteed!
    Jealous much? :P
    ~Self-depricating Megalomaniacal Superwolf

  2. #22
    Permabanned
    Join Date
    May 2009
    MBTI
    ISFP
    Enneagram
    6w7 sx
    Socionics
    SEE Fi
    Posts
    25,301

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Fluffywolf View Post
    He also said she has been a friend for several years and most of his descriptions are recent problems and might even be false assumptions or based on recent awkwardness, plus, they are young. The fact remains they were good friends for a long period before, so there is no reason to assume they can't be in the future at this point.

    It's not about getting over miserable feelings the easiest way, it's about getting over miserable feelings the best way.
    Um, I disagree. It's about getting over miserable feelings. Most times people cannot continue to be close if one person is in love with the other and the other is just not interested at all for whatever reason.

    I had a best guy friend in high school who wanted to date me when we got to be about 18 or 19, and I totally saw him as my brother, even though he was cute and everything, and we didn't talk for a while, but now that he's married and has a baby and stuff we're totally friends again, like everything is as it should be.

    Have common sense and be practical. I agree with Oaky.

  3. #23
    Nips away your dignity Fluffywolf's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2009
    MBTI
    INTP
    Enneagram
    9 sp/sx
    Posts
    9,422

    Default

    All I know is I'd be miserable giving up a good friendship based on irrational thoughts. And considering what he said and their age, that's exactly what this would be. If it is common sense to walk away, I am glad I don't have any. :P

    I never gave up a friendship at least.
    ~Self-depricating Megalomaniacal Superwolf

  4. #24
    Listening Oaky's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2009
    MBTI
    INTJ
    Enneagram
    5w6 sp/so
    Socionics
    SLI None
    Posts
    6,168

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Fluffywolf View Post
    Jealous much? :P
    Totally jealous.

  5. #25
    Permabanned
    Join Date
    May 2009
    MBTI
    ISFP
    Enneagram
    6w7 sx
    Socionics
    SEE Fi
    Posts
    25,301

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Fluffywolf View Post
    All I know is I'd be miserable giving up a good friendship based on irrational thoughts. And considering what he said and their age, that's exactly what this would be. If it is common sense to walk away, I am glad I don't have any. :P

    I never gave up a friendship at least.
    But he says she's selfish, talks about herself all the time, and has a boyfriend.

    I could see if they were adults, both single, and they had a really solid friendship, then yes, don't just discard the friendship.

    But they're in high school, this girl probably sees him as "dick under glass" or "the friend guy who gives me emotional support when I'm mad at my boyfriend."

    And he should remain miserable for her? I don't think so. I don't agree with your morality, as I think it is idealistic and impractical in this particular situation. I judge morals on a contextual, situational basis, and in this case it seems perfectly moral for him to walk away.

  6. #26
    Nips away your dignity Fluffywolf's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2009
    MBTI
    INTP
    Enneagram
    9 sp/sx
    Posts
    9,422

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Marmie Dearest View Post
    But he says she's selfish, talks about herself all the time, and has a boyfriend.
    She's 17. Probably insecure on many subjects, talking about herself and looking for feedback is probably not an actual act of selfishness. I'm sure there is much more to it and if he gets over his feeling barrier, I'm sure he could penetrate that on a friend level.

    Quote Originally Posted by Marmie Dearest View Post
    I could see if they were adults, both single, and they had a really solid friendship, then yes, don't just discard the friendship.

    But they're in high school, this girl probably sees him as "dick under glass" or "the friend guy who gives me emotional support when I'm mad at my boyfriend."
    Exactly, it's a phase.

    Quote Originally Posted by Marmie Dearest View Post
    And he should remain miserable for her? I don't think so. I don't agree with your morality, as I think it is idealistic and impractical in this particular situation. I judge morals on a contextual, situational basis, and in this case it seems perfectly moral for him to walk away.
    No one said anything about staying miserable, he just needs to put himself above that and look at what actually matters.
    ~Self-depricating Megalomaniacal Superwolf

  7. #27
    Permabanned
    Join Date
    May 2009
    MBTI
    ISFP
    Enneagram
    6w7 sx
    Socionics
    SEE Fi
    Posts
    25,301

    Default

    I think he should inform her why he's walking away though.

    You never know. If she's under the threat of losing him, maybe she would realize she had feelings for him...or not.

    But either way, it would resolve the situation.

  8. #28
    Permabanned
    Join Date
    May 2009
    MBTI
    ISFP
    Enneagram
    6w7 sx
    Socionics
    SEE Fi
    Posts
    25,301

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Fluffywolf View Post
    She's 17. Probably insecure on many subjects, talking about herself and looking for feedback is probably not an actual act of selfishness. I'm sure there is much more to it and if he gets over his feeling barrier, I'm sure he could penetrate that on a friend level.



    Exactly, it's a phase.



    No one said anything about staying miserable, he just needs to put himself above that and look at what actually matters.
    He's 17 too, WTF.

    I think you're projecting some serious Fe onto this situation.

  9. #29
    Nips away your dignity Fluffywolf's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2009
    MBTI
    INTP
    Enneagram
    9 sp/sx
    Posts
    9,422

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Marmie Dearest View Post
    He's 17 too, WTF.

    I think you're projecting some serious Fe onto this situation.
    Yeah bit he's INTP oddball, used to being outside of the box, and if he is anything like I was at that age, I have faith in him in regards to this situation.

    Hehe, I don't show it often, but in some cases and especially on some matters that are rather close to my heart, I do definately have a lot of Fe going on. I see this as a good thing. :P

    My best friend is someone I once developped feelings for while she was in a relationship. I too first felt like just running off, there was awkwardness from both sides, she picked up on my distress pretty easily and it was rather annoying all around. I reflected upon the situation until I was satisfied and turned my feelings toward her in a loving way that works between friends and am still blessed with her participation in my life. Without her, I don't know where I would be, honestly.

    Now Im not saying it's the same situation as his, but what if it could be? There is a lot to lose by going away, and there is not much to lose by staying. Especially for us INTP's to whom good friendships don't come easy.
    ~Self-depricating Megalomaniacal Superwolf

  10. #30
    Dreaming the life onemoretime's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2009
    MBTI
    3h50
    Socionics
    ILE
    Posts
    4,460

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Fluffywolf View Post
    She's 17. Probably insecure on many subjects, talking about herself and looking for feedback is probably not an actual act of selfishness. I'm sure there is much more to it and if he gets over his feeling barrier, I'm sure he could penetrate that on a friend level.
    It's not worth the cost. The world's too big, with too many people, to waste time pining over someone who's going to take that much effort at best, and probably won't ever happen.

    Exactly, it's a phase.
    And our friend Kirby here is at the point where what he needs most is to live his own life, without needing to validate it through the opinions of others. His happiness should not depend on the judgment of what appears to be a very confused young woman.

    No one said anything about staying miserable, he just needs to put himself above that and look at what actually matters.
    Yes, but this is spectacularly hard to do when you're 17.

Similar Threads

  1. Why do people care about defining whether they, or anyone else, is E or I?
    By Il Morto Che Parla in forum Myers-Briggs and Jungian Cognitive Functions
    Replies: 23
    Last Post: 04-04-2013, 04:17 AM
  2. Why do YOU care about the presidency?
    By Magic Poriferan in forum Politics, History, and Current Events
    Replies: 10
    Last Post: 09-17-2012, 09:41 PM
  3. Why do people care about truth so much?
    By Athenian200 in forum General Psychology
    Replies: 39
    Last Post: 10-26-2009, 12:15 AM
  4. [JCF] why do infjs care so much about people/relationships/interactions
    By peppermint13 in forum The NF Idyllic (ENFP, INFP, ENFJ, INFJ)
    Replies: 27
    Last Post: 08-16-2008, 06:47 AM

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
Single Sign On provided by vBSSO