Two close friends of mine have been in a relationship for over a year now. I love them both to pieces, they both say they are happy and in love but I find the mechanics of their relationship very confusing. I get that it's not really my business to understand because it's not my relationship, but I was hoping you guys might have a little bit of insight on the matter.
The ISTJ (male) of this relationship has confessed to me that when the two of them are alone the INTJ (female) acts quite different, but as soon as you throw anyone else into the mix they seem to bicker, a lot. Not serious bickering. More like children where one will meanly tease the other, the other will react, then they start play fighting. It's funny at first to witness, but grows exhausting over the course of the evening. As an ESFJ I read this kind of behaviour as destructive to the relationship. Things like name calling, picking on one another, put-downs etc. Don't sit well with me. But they are my friends, and I believe them when they say they're happy so I do my best to stay out of it. I just wish I could understand better.
Is this a type thing? Have any INTJs on this forum ever paired themselves with an ISTJ and had a similar outcome? Or is this something completely different? There's strangely not much on a quick google search about this relationship overview. Best I could find was a chart on Socionics.Com that listed this pairing as 'Comparative' but I'm more interested in your opinions.