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  1. #41
    Nips away your dignity Fluffywolf's Avatar
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    Right. Thanks.
    ~Self-depricating Megalomaniacal Superwolf

  2. #42
    resonance entropie's Avatar
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    Consider aswell the possibility to get a third and neutral opinion into the relationship, maybe even a professional one. He wont reflect himself without new input and he knows you, you are his brother; I doubt you can surprise him that much
    [URL]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tEBvftJUwDw&t=0s[/URL]

  3. #43
    Nips away your dignity Fluffywolf's Avatar
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    Thanks a bunch for all the input everyone. I'll mull this all over and let it sink in for a little while.

    Quote Originally Posted by entropie View Post
    Consider aswell the possibility to get a third and neutral opinion into the relationship, maybe even a professional one. He wont reflect himself without new input and he knows you, you are his brother; I doubt you can surprise him that much
    I have been pondering that as well for some time now, if I could get someone else to 'fix' him, while I am out of the loop, it would obviously be prefered, it was one of my first thoughts when I started to address this as an issue. But I don't really have a good candidate for it, I'm not sure his relationship is all roses, and his girlfriend is a very submissive and introverted type with a tough past. Lovely girl but not not really what he needs, so through her doesn't seem like a good idea. So, not something I am going to mess about in. As for a third party that's completely neutral. I doubt he'd buy it. But if I find an oppertunity like this, I will definately explore it.
    ~Self-depricating Megalomaniacal Superwolf

  4. #44
    resonance entropie's Avatar
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    Ya I hear you, sounds very deadlocked as we say in german, wish I could help more.

    If he doesnt listen to anything, tell him you know a contract killer from Germany who you will unleash on him if he doesnt comply. I am happy to help you with the plot
    [URL]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tEBvftJUwDw&t=0s[/URL]

  5. #45
    A window to the soul
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    ENTP in counseling? Funny!! That will end with the ENTP counseling the counselor. If he's depressed, I don't think talk is going to motivate him as much as your proactive actions done with enthusiasm. Take charge! You can try motivating him by stepping on his toes; he should instinctively try to take back the reigns and go above & beyond whatever you're doing. That would be the crude approach, but it just might work for ya.

  6. #46
    half mystic, half skeksis jenocyde's Avatar
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    That would work if he wasn't already in a power struggle with him. Stepping on his toes could be shockingly bad.

    I think the best way to be proactive (after
    telling him that you're not into the way things are going) is to drop your responsibilities and walk away, like I said. Nothing says "I'm being serious" more than a man who has worked so hard to build his future but is willing to walk away from all of it because of ME and my bad attitude. That's a real wake up call. My Fe can't handle it. I don't want to ruin anyone's life or be the cause of any major action like that. I just want to live and let live.

    And I agree about the third party/therapist thing. I mean, I agree with Nerd Girl. If someone approaches me with that idea, I'm assuming that the person is already on the offensive. Not a very good starting place.

    Also, I don't trust or respect anyone's opinion unless they've earned their right to give it, and have proven to me that they truly are impartial and intelligent.

  7. #47
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    Quote Originally Posted by jenocyde View Post
    That would work if he wasn't already in a power struggle with him. Stepping on his toes could be shockingly bad.
    I think you're probably right about that.

    Quote Originally Posted by jenocyde View Post
    I think the best way to be proactive (after
    telling him that you're not into the way things are going) is to drop your responsibilities and walk away, like I said. Nothing says "I'm being serious" more than a man who has worked so hard to build his future but is willing to walk away from all of it because of ME and my bad attitude. That's a real wake up call. My Fe can't handle it. I don't want to ruin anyone's life or be the cause of any major action like that. I just want to live and let live.
    Walking away, might mean catastrophic fail for the business and the relationship. That would cause me to snap out of it for sure. But understand, this could all go very wrong, if his brother is so broken from depression/stress and is unable to reconcile right away. That would suck. Fluffy should seriously consider having another job lined up. I also think he should give his brother 2-weeks notice, don't you? (Playing by the rules.)

  8. #48
    half mystic, half skeksis jenocyde's Avatar
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    Totally. When I say walk away, I don't mean it as a manipulation tactic. I mean be totally prepared to walk away from the situation in its entirety.

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