I've been told I'm very sensitive, and that I don't take criticism very well...which means I become mortified. At times it's like depression swallowed me, like a giant slug ingested me. It's much better now, of course.
I like what someone said which was the classic idea, "If you can do something about it, then do it, but if you can't, then don't worry about it." Lot's of people say things along those lines. It's found in the Dali Lama's "Art of Happiness" As I grow older, I have a better idea of what I can do or not. I've also learned that depression is part of a process. With philosophical and mystical tools, depression is a source of power and rebirth.
Back in Sept. I had emergency surgery for appendicitis. The idea I was in pain was bad, but the idea that I could eat or work bothered me a lot more. Thus I had surgery. I was unable to eat for a whole week. In the physical aspect, as soon as I could eat, I felt like I was winning.
Then I got my bills. I was horrified. This caused more stress than being sick. It was over $32,000. I didn't know what I could do. I was extremely depressed. Ironically, I'd rather die than pay that. First, I wrote everyone and told them their bill was unreasonable; the letters were crazy emotional rants. In response, some told me how to apply for financial aid.
After that, I got educated. I talked to people. I read books on finances, collections, and tried to understand the full extent of what they could do.
Also, I'm experienced. For three years, I just took my bills and all mail I received and just put it in the trash. I just told people I'd died for three years. So although the new medical creditors have a great deal of power, they are acting against a force of nature. There are mystical states where shame cannot go, or where negativity only improves things.
However, I'd just "rehabilitated" my credit for those previous issues, so I didn't really want to fight that kind of war, unless I had to do so. (Ha, the previous war was also started by a medical issue that I disagreed with. They were forced to write off.)
After I got "educated" by books and talking to people, I was less afraid. There is nothing they could do to me. Ever. Thus, they wrote off a total of about 90%. My letters got more focused and matter of fact; the rhetoric sharper, less emotional. I found out how to get charity, and what kinds of documents I actually needed. Then I further reduced that by having discussions with the hospital administrator.
So, in general, if I'm under stress, I write. Writing is my sword. If there is an issue at work that is bad, then I'll write about it. I'll be up in the middle of the night re-writing.
Other things? Well, I've abused alcohol and food. Yet, generally, I eat fairly badly like I might die tomorrow or something. Now I'd say I just drink occasionally, and not very much. Mostly what i do is write friends. Then I write other people. I rant. Then I write to the person who has made me upset, or someone who I think can fix it.