So I keep hanging out with EXTPs of both varieties and they seem willing, even eager, to find specific individuals to blame when shit goes wrong. I, being a ridiculous enfp, will do everything I can not to assign blame to a specific individual, and instead point blame at either entire groups, management of groups, procedures or problems with the logistics of the group.
I explained to my entp best buddy that when she highlights a specific person, it either feels like she is talking trash or is "throwing someone under the bus". After a fifteen minute convo explaining what "throwing somebody under the bus" meant, I realized it was highly likely my ENTP had "thrown me under the bus" on occasion based upon her slightly nervous expression. This makes me giggle and I still love her.
This isnt about judging or giving you guys shit at all as obviously I am being a bit nuerotic and missing something here. She explained that everybody messes up and it is totally okay to complain when someone else pisses you off and fucks up. She said it is the Ti venting thing.
So my Qs-
Did I totally misunderstand this^^^?
How do you know if somebody else has fucked up a little vs a lot? Is it about how frequently everyone complains about them or some sort of modification of terminology or intensity of the complaint?
Is venting bonding?
What does it sound like if I shift the convo to something away from blaming an individual-like talking about the whole group, or processes or logistics-the EXTPs all get odd at this point and quit talking, and I am thus confused....it's how I vent, but they dont seem to get the shift in convo...
When i do talk about someone I must fuck it up as the EXTPs again get quiet-any ideas about what I am saying that is "sounds" wrong?
(I have been drinking thus this may be somewhat confusing, so interpret as needed.)