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  1. #21
    Senior Member Nameless's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Duke of York View Post
    True, very true. Therefore, you could view the temporary insanity of early romance to be a necessary risk involved in the progression towards a stable long-term relationship.

    To make my POV clear: I have never been in love, and I do not have any desire to pursue it. My preference has been strongly reinforced by the recent discoveries, since I will always avoid anything that I know will adversely affect my thinking. I view it similarly to addictive drugs.

    And so it is with some bewilderment that I watch other people actually seeking love, even though it is known to make them irrational. Perhaps it is addictive. The brain patterns observed included sensations of euphoria, and maybe once a person has felt it, he feels like he needs more.

    Anyway, I posted this thread out of curiosity about why others do this. I do not have much authority on the subject, so I am not trying to declare you all insane. I just want to know [I]why[I].
    It is like an addictive drug (and it's withdrawal period can be up there with the worst of them!).
    I never understood why many of my friends always insisted on being in long-term relationships all the time...I could never see past the one-night stand lust-motivated type of thing, and, beyond that, it didn't make sense to me either, I was pretty much like you.

    But then one day it happened for me, and lasted beyond the initial first-three-months glow-period of the relationship and I was introduced to a sort of infinite peace that I had never experienced before from anything else when I was with that person, at least not to that extent...a sort of content-with-the world type of feeling that I had lost after growing up a little and losing my childhood naive-ness [I know that's not a word] (I don't really have any experience to speak of of actual drugs aside from alcohol; maybe they cause you to experience the same type of things).

    Anyways, you'll be able to avoid it successfully, I think, as long as you never experience it. But once you do, look out...you'll be introduced to something that you didn't know you needed and really have no practical use for, but that you now need having experienced it once.

    I do hope though that eventually you'll let yourself fall into love; you may end up liking it!

  2. #22
    The Black Knight Domino's Avatar
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    I envy you, Nameless.
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  3. #23
    Senior Member Nameless's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Duke of York View Post
    Whoa, I did sound like some kind of verbose professor in paragraph.
    I guess that is why you found my being an NT so funny?

    Well, I would have a greater understanding of human thought. But is it worth it? I could also have a greater understanding of a homicidal psychopath's mind if I was caused to think like him for a month or two, but I simply do not want to understand it. If something is irrational, all there is to understand is that you don't want to be so corrupted as to be able to understand it. (Does that make any sense?)

    Okay, rephrase: When I say "understand," I mean to be able to think that the irrational thought process makes sense, and to be able to use that thought process to reason, just as those who have it naturally do. If you meant being unable to comprehend the logic of the illogical, but being able to predict the outcome of the illogical reasoning, that's a different matter.

    Okay, next: The highest form of living. Those who are irrational probably enjoy life more most of the time. Ignorance is bliss for those who suffer from it. In my case, though, I would know what I once had, and would feel the loss of my rational quality.

    So love is addictive. Now I know.

    All right, I understand your point. People like to be in love. But then they complain when it doesn't work out, and a great deal of emotional upheaval results when the love is over. What if it causes more pain than pleasure? Overall, would most people have been happier if they hadn't gotten into the vicious circle in the first place?
    For me, in the long run, I think it's totally worth it. The negative memories of the breakup/fights/etc. tend to fade, and you're sort of left with the happy ones, in my experience. Kind of like how you don't remember the hours spent in the library when you think back to college.

    I think true love, whatever your definition of that may be, when it is achieved, is one of the few truly perfect things that exists, so for me, that's worth the possibility of pain every time.

  4. #24
    Senior Member Nameless's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by PinkPiranha View Post
    I envy you, Nameless.
    I'm sure you'll find it sooner or later...I'm looking for it again too

  5. #25
    Senior Member TheLastMohican's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by nightning View Post
    Correlation is not causality. You can make the opposite claim that schizophrenics are in love with themselves... inside their mind.
    If one of a schizophrenic's two personalities fell in love with the other...
    That's weird.

    But good point. I like thinking outside of the box.

  6. #26
    `~~Philosoflying~~` SillySapienne's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Nameless View Post
    For me, in the long run, I think it's totally worth it. The negative memories of the breakup/fights/etc. tend to fade, and you're sort of left with the happy ones, in my experience. Kind of like how you don't remember the hours spent in the library when you think back to college.

    I think true love, whatever your definition of that may be, when it is achieved, is one of the few truly perfect things that exists, so for me, that's worth the possibility of pain every time.
    I've only been in love once, and I couldn't agree more with this POV.

    It was a truly awesome experience, and one I would easily repeat again (If that's even possible :sad.
    `
    'Cause you can't handle me...

    "A lie is a lie even if everyone believes it. The truth is the truth even if nobody believes it." - David Stevens

    "That that is, is. That that is not, is not. Is that it? It is."

    Veritatem dies aperit

    Ride si sapis

    Intelligentle sparkles

  7. #27
    The Black Knight Domino's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Nameless View Post
    I'm sure you'll find it sooner or later...I'm looking for it again too
    You're quite the fetching cheese burger. I think you won't be single long. *scooby doo laugh*
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  8. #28
    Senior Member htb's Avatar
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    Girls make you crazy. Stay away.

  9. #29
    Senior Member TheLastMohican's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by FMWarner View Post
    1. Any time you entertain a new theory, concept or activity you run the risk of affecting your thinking. You run the risk of changing your opinion or decision-making process. But that is to your benefit...more information is always better when making decisions, unless you're confident that your logical mind has evolved as much as it needs to.

    2. Have you ever ridden a roller coaster? Had an alcoholic beverage? Eaten chocolate? All these things affect your brain chemistry in a way similar to a drug and change your thinking temporarily. Why is it that you reserve your disapproval for love?

    3. Love will affect your thinking, no doubt. But is it necessarily adverse? Even putting aside the considerable and well-documented mental and physical benefits of a romantic relationship, it can only help your understanding of others by putting you in their shoes. This makes your thinking more effective. From a purely logical standpoint, that doesn't sound adverse to me. These are all tangible benefits, and you're balancing them against a murky kind of lovesick brain lock that you haven't fully explained or given an example of. What kinds of decisions are you afraid to make "under the influence of love"?


    Yes, I swear I'm an INTJ

    1. I do not think that being in love can be compared to contemplating a new theory. When thinking about a theory, I am relying on my logic and critical thinking skills to reason my way through and come to a conclusion. The whole problem with being in love is that this ability is dampened.

    The only benefit to "understanding" the feeling of being in love that I can think of is being able to predict with greater accuracy how those in love will behave. I do not think that would provide enough advantage to outweigh the period of time when you also would have to suffer from such irrationality.


    2. Yes, I have ridden on a roller coaster and eaten chocolate. Again, I do not think these can be fairly compared to being in love. Both would provide a temporary mood boost. The roller coaster provides some pleasure simply by going fast. Speed feels good as long as you don't have trouble with motion sickness. But chocolate and roller coasters do not affect the reasoning ability or the momentary intelligence. (Alcohol does; that is fair to compare to love, and that is why I plan never to consume it.)

    Love, on the other hand, is much longer-term, and has a much different effect. Being drunk is an excellent comparison. It's not just an improvement of mood, but also a severe damping of the thought process, reducing inhibitions and removing a lot of the "think first" mentality. Eating chocolate will not inhibit you from using all of your logic, because its effect is far too small and only affects how happy you feel. If you are making big decisions when in love, though (which is quite common, i.e. marriage plans), you are compromising your future due to your overwhelmed system.

    3. Well, the first thing that comes to mind is marrying the wrong person. But plenty of other unrelated things can go wrong when you are not thinking straight. My beloved's best friend's third cousin twice removed could arrange to sell me a car at twice market value. Who knows? People are not careful with money when in love. That is how jewelry stores convince people to spend tens of thousands of dollars on metal ellipses. (Trust me, she won't know the difference if it's made of bronze.)

    I am not really afraid of it, though. I am fairly confident I can avoid falling in love, and my relentlessly rational INTJ grey matter will remain undisturbed.
    I just wanted to know what was up with everyone else.

  10. #30
    The Black Knight Domino's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by htb View Post
    Girls make you crazy. Stay away.
    Stop wearing such tight pants then. And no more see-through shirt either. Also, the donuts. Stop that too. You wretchedly teasing man-beast.
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