[ENTJ] ENTJ's: Why don't you want to be my friend??

[theniteshadow3]

Hi guys, this is my first post! (I know...another INTP, woo...)

So I was thinking about my most recent and closest friends, trying to figure out their types and such, and then it occurred to me. I don't have any ENTJ friends, and I'm not sure why. I can't even think of the last ENTJ friend I've had in life. Its practically become a foreign type to me.

Funny thing is, is that this type happens to be one of my compatible relationship types (according to the personality page) and I've never had a g/f... ever (yeah, yeah I know...).

Is it just a difficult type for INTP's to get to know/meet or vise versa?
If any of you guys have a similar situation (with any type combination) I would love to hear about it.

So to all you ENTJ's out there, who are you! And why don't you like me?

 

[rav3n]

Have you ever met any ENTJs in real life?

 

[Litvyak]

I can only speak for myself, but self-deprecation is not very appealing. Tone it down.

 

[theniteshadow3]

I'm sure I've meet and even talked to some, but I've never gotten to know any.



And I didn't mean to belittle myself at all. I'm not sure which part to tone down, unless its the last sentence--which i guess was just a bad joke.

The main purpose of my post was to find out how well other INTP's get along with ENTJ's both in friendship and intimacy, and also if any other types have experienced something similar to my situation.

Mere curiosity.

 

[figsfiggyfigs]

*sniffs*

I smell cling.

 

[Neutralpov]

Hi guys, this is my first post! (I know...another INTP, woo...)

So I was thinking about my most recent and closest friends, trying to figure out their types and such, and then it occurred to me. I don't have any ENTJ friends, and I'm not sure why. I can't even think of the last ENTJ friend I've had in life. Its practically become a foreign type to me.

Funny thing is, is that this type happens to be one of my compatible relationship types (according to the personality page) and I've never had a g/f... ever (yeah, yeah I know...).

Is it just a difficult type for INTP's to get to know/meet or vise versa?
If any of you guys have a similar situation (with any type combination) I would love to hear about it.

So to all you ENTJ's out there, who are you! And why don't you like me?

Deal with whatever stress first if you have any. This reeks of inferior fe meaning you might be under a stressful thought or situation while writing this.

 

[Ginkgo]

*sniffs*

I smell cling.

nastay.

 

[theniteshadow3]

Snap. I guess the style/tone I chose to write this in was the wrong one. I'm not dealing with any stress atm, since I have nothing to stress me out. The post really isn't going in the direction I had hoped, but I am still interested in the subject. Should I just start a new one in a more formal tone?

 

[Neutralpov]

haha welcome to Typology Central. Just wait it out. The ENTJs are probably lurking.

As for ENTJs where I live? They are all at the university MBA program where I work and then placed at a Dell/similar tech office in management. Try checking a business networking event in town. I got NTJ swarmed being the like rare NF.

 

[Litvyak]

(I know...another INTP, woo...)
I've never had a g/f... ever (yeah, yeah I know...).
And why don't you like me?

These parts.

 

[JoSunshine]

One of my best friends is an ENJT (love her!). She was engaged to an INTP and it worked at first but ultimately erupted in flames. She is very direct and at times aggressive and he answered her aggressiveness with passive aggressiveness (in the long term) which then ramped up her aggressiveness....and around they went. IMO ENTJs are one of the few dominate types who actually appreciate people standing up to them. I know that she would rather have a good argument with someone and put everything on the table than to have someone comply in the short-term and then revert to passive-aggressive behavior. I'm not saying all INTP's are passive aggressive, but I do think that in many cases it would be easy for the dynamic I described above to develop. That's been my observation anyway.

 

[rav3n]

According to Isabel Myers, ENTJs comprise between 2 - 5% of the population. Per gender assuming 50/50, 1 - 2.5% of the population.

We're pretty easy to spot so it's possible you haven't come across any. But sometimes, ESTJs and ESTPs get confused for ENTJs due to Kiersey's "Field Martial" description.

 

[Thalassa]

I've known two ENTJs (for certain) IRL that I didn't talk to on-line first. It was incredibly easy to befriend both, one female and the other male ...am still friends with the male...it happened quite naturally.

Maybe you've never met an ENTJ? Or maybe you should become an ENFP.

 

[Glycerine]

I LOVE ENTJ females.... whatever you do, be direct and don't play passive aggressive games. They respect upfrontness a ton Take the directness as a grain of salt. They say what they mean.... it's quite refreshing. They seem like ENFJs but with a rougher edge about them.This is from an outsider's perspective.

 

[ThatGirl]

One of my best friends is an ENJT (love her!). She was engaged to an INTP and it worked at first but ultimately erupted in flames. She is very direct and at times aggressive and he answered her aggressiveness with passive aggressiveness (in the long term) which then ramped up her aggressiveness....and around they went. IMO ENTJs are one of the few dominate types who actually appreciate people standing up to them. I know that she would rather have a good argument with someone and put everything on the table than to have someone comply in the short-term and then revert to passive-aggressive behavior. I'm not saying all INTP's are passive aggressive, but I do think that in many cases it would be easy for the dynamic I described above to develop. That's been my observation anyway.

Wow, that sounded amazingly accurate. Then again that sounds like anyone paired with an INTP.

Can't speak for anyone else, but I usually have a love/hate thing with INTPs.....Mostly short term mental stimulation followed by long term hate. Ultimately frustration with them.

 

[Vie]

^^

xNTPs are incredibly fascinating to me and I love hanging around them and being with them. However, I also get that....frustration with them at times. And it gets really REALLY ugly. :\
I have several long term NF friends, back from the days of preschool. Otherwise, I generally stick with the NT friends.

 

[ThatGirl]

No offense to INTPs but I have found it comes down to the mental arrogance.

They always end up thinking they are smarter and I end up thinking they are concerned with things that don't really matter.

Inevitably the difference of opinion leads to contention, and since neither of us are the type to budge, it can become war. Or we just blow each other off, and think the other is retarded.

 

[JoSunshine]

I kind of agree with that ^ assessment from my observation, but I will say that my ENTJ friend will budge, you just have to give her a good reason to budge and she has to think you are worth budging for.

 

[rav3n]

One of my best friends is an ENJT (love her!). She was engaged to an INTP and it worked at first but ultimately erupted in flames. She is very direct and at times aggressive and he answered her aggressiveness with passive aggressiveness (in the long term) which then ramped up her aggressiveness....and around they went. IMO ENTJs are one of the few dominate types who actually appreciate people standing up to them. I know that she would rather have a good argument with someone and put everything on the table than to have someone comply in the short-term and then revert to passive-aggressive behavior. I'm not saying all INTP's are passive aggressive, but I do think that in many cases it would be easy for the dynamic I described above to develop. That's been my observation anyway.

INTPs value their autonomy and will withdraw if they sense attempts to control. In essence, they introvert their need for autonomy.

ENTJs value our autonomy but we extrovert this by attempting to control our environment.

If you believe in the function priorities theory, add in that both types have inferior feeling decision makers and you've got a messy mix. When things are going well, they can be incredible. When things aren't going so well where trust or respect is lost between the two, it's Nightmare on Elm Street!

 

[ThatGirl]

Sure if both parties are willing to get to the root of the issue and connect vision.

Usually by that time though, each person is already heading in a different direction.

I should also state that initial interactions with an INTP are amazing.

Most of this comes from their ability to create new ideas, then I have fun tweaking them into workable concepts and applying them. The conversation can be stimulating for hours.

It depends though on how open the INTP is for theorizing. Some are less concerned with concepts and can go on for hours just trying to spit out everything that has been on their mind for the last ten years in the driest, and most circular detailed way possible.

Those INTPs I can only take for a short time, before becoming impatient and wanting to yell "Point! In one sentence or less!"

Lol, INTPs are crazy.