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  1. #1
    Senior Member think2much's Avatar
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    Default Everyone around me says I"m negative

    I"m negative and complain a lot.

    Also called me boring, for some reason this angers me a lot. I don't get people, I can't connect with them. maby it's cause my T/F is 50-50.

    When I get like this I usually just say fk people, I don't need them. At the same time it isn't healthy to be alone all the time.

    I don't think there's something wrong with me which makes this more frustrating.

  2. #2
    Senior Member ScorpioINTP's Avatar
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    I feel ya brother. I get that sometimes too. I am honest. I call things like I see them. I am cynical, sarcastic and skeptical in general and its my preferred sense of humor style. I think I am a realist mostly. I see everything that can go wrong and anticipate the worse (hope for the best). I hate disappointment, so I expect the worst in an attempt to lower my own expectations. I guess I do complain alot sometimes too. I don't really think I am negative deep down. I often get the shit end of the stick, so maybe it does make me negative.

    Welcome to the INTP world.

  3. #3
    Senior Member ThatsWhatHeSaid's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by think2much View Post
    I"m negative and complain a lot.

    Also called me boring, for some reason this angers me a lot. I don't get people, I can't connect with them. maby it's cause my T/F is 50-50.

    When I get like this I usually just say fk people, I don't need them. At the same time it isn't healthy to be alone all the time.

    I don't think there's something wrong with me which makes this more frustrating.
    Either you do care (my guess) or you're just looking to find something to be frustrated about to earn you some pity points. Or maybe it's both. Maybe you complain because you don't know who else you're supposed to be or how to connect with people. I can relate to that. I can also relate to saying there's nothing wrong with me so I don't have to face the fact that something feels incredibly off.

    There's a school of therapy called Reality Therapy that posits that your relationships make up the quality of your life, and that all dysfunctional is a product of dysfunctional interpersonal relationships. Reality therapists work hard to have people examine and confront their situation so they can start to make changes. I think they're probably right.

    If, by any chance, you aren't sure how to relate and who to be, the best thing you can do is be really patient and just try and do your best. You don't have to fit any standard or anyone's conception of who you're supposed to be. You can just be quiet when you're not sure what to say, or just say you're thinking. You don't have to do anything else, because eventually, if you can stay a little open-minded, your anxiety and confusion will melt away and you'll know how to be pleasant (not perfect) without sacrificing authenticity.

  4. #4
    half mystic, half skeksis jenocyde's Avatar
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    Do you agree that you complain a lot? You may or may not see this as a negative trait, but for me, I can only listen to someone bitch for so long before I snap. I can't stand whiners, either change your situation, lighten up or stfu. I hate being around mopey people more than anything in the world.

    About being boring... yeah, your post showed that a bit. If you're not even interested in what you're saying, why should anyone else be?

  5. #5
    Senior Member bcubchgo's Avatar
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    Welcome to the NT club! Your decoder ring will be in the mail.
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
    ++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
    SCOEI / Inquisitive

  6. #6
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    I remember being a teenager and thinking INTx types were mostly dreadfully negative or boring. Mostly negative, which may sound surprising to people who have encountered me later in life when I'm known to be a little more crass and cynical. I don't think I started to like being attracted to INT types at all until I was about 21.

    Are you very young?

  7. #7
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    Also, in all fairness, I would probably guess that most INT who met me before the age of 20 or so probably thought I was an annoying, deranged idiot or a cocktease or a whore or all of the above.

  8. #8
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    Quote Originally Posted by think2much View Post
    I"m negative and complain a lot.
    Stop complaining and get a life! Just kidding.

    If you know you're driving people away with the negativity, then why not strive to change your ways?

  9. #9
    Senior Member think2much's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Not_Me View Post
    Stop complaining and get a life! Just kidding.

    If you know you're driving people away with the negativity, then why not strive to change your ways?
    I just stopped talking, if I don't say anything problem solved.

    I'm just going through some major depression.

  10. #10
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    Quote Originally Posted by think2much View Post
    I just stopped talking, if I don't say anything problem solved.

    I'm just going through some major depression.
    I'm sorry to hear that. But learning to interact better better with people is not difficult and can be rewarding.

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