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  1. #11
    half mystic, half skeksis jenocyde's Avatar
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    Very well said, Cafe. Even my INTP bf can be a pain in the ass sometimes with his mopey sarcasm, and he's in his 30s. I state what I want and tell him not to ruin shit for me because the world doesn't revolve around his need to sit on the computer. He doesn't get to sit around and complain while having every need provided for. Not gonna happen.

  2. #12
    Senior Member cafe's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by jenocyde View Post
    Very well said, Cafe. Even my INTP bf can be a pain in the ass sometimes with his mopey sarcasm, and he's in his 30s. I state what I want and tell him not to ruin shit for me because the world doesn't revolve around his need to sit on the computer. He doesn't get to sit around and complain while having every need provided for. Not gonna happen.
    Yeah, my 39 y/o INTP is still like that, too and I more or less handle it the same way minus the grounding, etc. I don't ask him to go places he doesn't want to go very often because he'll ruin my time, but when it's really important he knows it and tries to be a good sport. He's gotten a lot better about it with age, but I don't push it.
    “There are two novels that can change a bookish fourteen-year old’s life: The Lord of the Rings and Atlas Shrugged. One is a childish fantasy that often engenders a lifelong obsession with its unbelievable heroes, leading to an emotionally stunted, socially crippled adulthood, unable to deal with the real world. The other, of course, involves orcs.”
    ~ John Rogers

  3. #13
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    Maybe you could let him do exactly what he wants to do

    what i mean is you should just leave him alone
    Light travels faster than sound.
    This is why some people seem bright before they speak.

  4. #14
    half mystic, half skeksis jenocyde's Avatar
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    Hahaha, Cafe... same with me. He comes out 25% of the time, and he has to be charming. He's gotten better at it, for sure. And I leave him sitting alone in the dark the other 75% of the time.

    @Barris- that's not really practical. Life doesn't work that way. He's just a child. If left to his own devices, he probably wouldn't even go to school, either. I know that I wouldn't have.

  5. #15
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    well, duh
    I meant when they're at home
    Light travels faster than sound.
    This is why some people seem bright before they speak.

  6. #16
    Emerging Tallulah's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Bårris View Post
    well, duh
    I meant when they're at home
    Well, that's usually what an INTx kid wants. But that leads to kids who don't know how to interact with others, and think their needs should come before anyone else's. I'm glad my mom expected me to do stuff with the family, and made me follow through on stuff I wasn't super-excited about. Balance and sacrifice can be good things.

    INTx kids do need to be left alone a good bit, though.
    Something Witty

  7. #17
    . Blank's Avatar
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    Buy a cat.
    Ti = 19 [][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][]
    Te = 16[][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][]
    Ne = 16[][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][]
    Fi = 15 [][][][][][][][][][][][][][][]
    Si = 12 [][][][][][][][][][][][]
    Ni = 12 [][][][][][][][][][][][]
    Se = 11[][][][][][][][][][][]
    Fe = 0

    -----------------
    Tiger got to hunt, bird got to fly;
    Man got to sit and wonder why, why, why;
    Tiger got to sleep, bird got to land;
    Man got to tell himself he understand

  8. #18
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    I heard you could return your child within 5 years of purchase and get 90% of your money back minus repackaging fees. Just put the child in an appropriately sized box with receipt and a filled out return form, and send it to the address listed. They should be able to get you a new child, grumpy-free, within 6 to 8 weeks of receipt of broken child.

    You'll have a 6 to 8 week period where you'll have to go without child, but I think it'll be worth it in the long run.

  9. #19
    Senior Member Nicodemus's Avatar
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    The child in question, alas, is already nine years old.

  10. #20
    Senior Member Quiet's Avatar
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    I think that with NT children, (and adults) it takes some reminding that there will be times that they have to just do things that don't make any sense. Life still happens and their presence is still needed. They need to know that they are loved and wanted despite their ambivalence towards it. I believe that deep down, NT's struggle with a deep frustration about "irrationality", and how it is difficult to not be able to categorize things that have no logical basis. Also, they struggle with basically avoiding things that will trigger an emotional response to it, because they find their feelings hard to accept and handle. Even the positive ones, appreciation of "moments" being one of them. So they need to have rules be made in a "casual" way, rather than there being any hints of "emergency" in your tone. A bit of attitudal distance with a "wink" and a little smile, does wonders when you are dealing with their stubbornness. It helps diffuse it to a degree, and you can work with them better. (so play it cool and relaxed with him and don't let him see your anxiety or frustration. He will just respect you less and put up more resistance).
    "What's Taters, Precious?" --- Gollum.

    "Bring your pretty face, to my axe". --- Gimly.

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