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Thread: Advice/Opinions Needed: INTJ female/ISTP male

  1. #11
    Junior Member Array Calida's Avatar
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    Sep 2010


    Quote Originally Posted by Randomnity View Post
    Well I came in this thread because I dated a IxTJ for a while. But I'm not sure experiences will be of any help because you've said some things that seem quite bizarre and I'm not sure where you're getting your information. It would help to read some past threads on this forum about Ti and ISTPs (there are some good ones and some bad ones here, though).

    This is not at all strange, though perhaps not stereotypical. Read the forum. While I'm not personally a fan of philosophy, some istps here are, and I am a voracious reader.

    Ok now I really want to know where you get your information. I'm almost surprised when an istp doesn't do these. The only type more likely for them is isfp.
    Ok fine maybe not strange, but like you said--not stereotypical. Also by the music and animal part is that he gets EXTREMELY happy and excited when he interacts with animals or plays music. Other times, he can be pretty stoic and unmoved.

    Not sure why you think S means emotionally sensitive. You are thinking of F, which is not even universally true. Some NTs as well as STs can be quite sensitive, and many many many Ts have learned how to be tactful with their words as well.
    As I have addressed above, it's from personal experience. It's not my perception of all ISTP, so I hope no offense is taken. If I have met someone like you or Orangey, my statement would have been phrased differently. Oh don't get me wrong, he's VERY tactful with his words when he chooses to speak. I'm the one who isn't tactful with my words--and my concern is his reception of what/how I communicate to him.

    So uh, how exactly is a male ISTP not precisely the male stereotype? Leadership, decision making, analytical mind and logic are stereotypically associated with ISTP along with "the male". So I don't really know what kind of crack you're smoking, seriously.
    Not smoking crack, just smoking cigarettes while dealing with abstract idesa. What I have mentioned is in terms of exercising these elements within the domestic setting. He is really good at processing information quickly and analysis in terms of things that are related to his skills. However, for abstract thinking or planning within the domestic setting, his leadership and decision making needs a lot of work (as he has mentioned to me).

    I just want to make a quick note that I have filtered out some information in my first post because I didn't think they were important for people to know. Big mistake. Through the interaction with you and Orangey, I am able to realize that what I deem as important and what both of you deem as important, are completely different matter. That's a really good reminder for me, thanks.

    I think here you're using sensor as a euphemism for "people who aren't that bright" because this is not an S trait.
    This is not true, so I am sorry if you have gotten this impression. Again, this is case specific to my partner... but I think that he is extremely bright and talented. I have learned a more from him than anyone I've been with in the past. However, what I am saying is that if I require my partner to think in the same pattern as I do, it would take longer. Similarly, if my partner somehow expects me to think like he does, it would take longer as well. So thanks for identifying the flaw regarding unrealistic expectation.

    I wish I could help but I think you need a better understanding of type before we can begin to have a conversation of this sort about it. Perhaps he's mistyped (isfp/isfj seems more likely than istp from what you've written here), or just a somewhat unusual istp. People don't always fit into their type stereotypes - but I'm very confused about the basic type stereotypes you've described, they really make no sense.
    I'm as confused about his type as you. Like I've mentioned, I am going by the result that I was given. We could speculate all the possibilities that we want, but I agree, some quirks here/there seem to be a little off. Nonetheless, he's really sharp when it comes to math and physics, and he likes doing hands on work much more than being in an office.

    Btw, I'm not attacking you nor feeling attacked. Just explaining why you might not get the kind of response you want. As an INTJ, you should relate to that. I've never in my life heard anyone say istps are typically oversensitive by the way so that was a good laugh.
    Mmm good that you had a good laugh I don't feel like I'm being attacked either. In fact, I have learned quite a bit from you two from the way you two ISTP's in the ways you criticize my approach as well as perspectives.

    I think I might have used sensitive in the wrong way? I don't know. Is "reactive" the proper word for this situation? What I meant by "sensitive' is that he can have strong (internal) opinions and reaction towards something that I would regard as a passing comment. Much like the interaction with you two ISTP, my immediate thought would be "Ok, the strong reaction and opinion that you throw back at me, is definitely NOT the intent to my statement".

    Thanks once again, for putting up with me :P
    I can actually see a better pattern by conversing with both of you. Maybe my responses have left you completely dissatisfied and you're convinced that I'm smoking crack, but that's totally fine by me. Just know that I appreciate your approach, criticism and feedback, since I'm already gaining a better understanding on how to handle the matter.

  2. #12
    Cheeseburgers Array freeeekyyy's Avatar
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    Feb 2010
    5w4 sx/sp
    ILI Te


    Quote Originally Posted by Calida View Post
    Thank you! Alas, a concrete solution--yes I know how to get along very well with INTPs. You have provided me with a few good points such as reliance on INTERNAL logic as well as pointing me towards my Ti development in order to communicate.

    Regarding confusion with SP and SJ noted. Though I must admit in this specific case, I have been questioning his distribution between P and J to be honest. His love for animals has caught me off guard as he told me that he is an ISTJ.
    ISTPs do often test as ISTJ. I'm not really sure why, but a lot of the MBTI tests do a poor job of determining that particular type. He probably took the test and accepted it, figuring it was close enough, not knowing that there was a more fitting type. Both ISTJs and ISTPs are very practical, so there are some similarities.
    You lose.


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