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  1. #1
    Consulting Detective Mr. Sherlock Holmes's Avatar
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    Default Is it hard being an NTJ female?

    I'd imagine this particularly would be difficult for a few gender role related reasons.

    1. Women are not treated with as much respect in the workplace. I know this is improving, but you still get a lot of people who want men in charge and to keep women out of business. Even though most will claim to be unbiased, it's not always true.

    2. Traditionally, men seem to be more attracted to F women and not those so intense and organisational as the NTJs. The masculine role traditionally asks for the men to be in control (as sexist as that is).

    So do you NTJ women normally have a problem with this sort of thing? Or are others generally more open to challenging these gender roles?

  2. #2
    nee andante bechimo's Avatar
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    So do you NTJ women normally have a problem with this sort of thing? Or are others generally more open to challenging these gender roles?

    No, since it's a waste of time to be a victim. Don't like something? Change it.

  3. #3
    Consulting Detective Mr. Sherlock Holmes's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Metaphor View Post
    So do you NTJ women normally have a problem with this sort of thing? Or are others generally more open to challenging these gender roles?

    No, since it's a waste of time to be a victim. Don't like something? Change it.
    Yeah, I know you would have that sort of attitude, but I was not sure if you would be successful.

  4. #4
    nee andante bechimo's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by mrsherlockholmes View Post
    Yeah, I know you would have that sort of attitude, but I was not sure if you would be successful.
    There are possibilities, impossibilities and probabilities. If you shoot for impossibilities rather than calculated probabilities or possibilities, you need to reconsider your desires or positioning.

  5. #5
    Pose! Salt n' pepper's Avatar
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    No, it rocks!

  6. #6
    He who laughs
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    Quote Originally Posted by mrsherlockholmes View Post
    2. Traditionally, men seem to be more attracted to F women and not those so intense and organisational as the NTJs. The masculine role traditionally asks for the men to be in control (as sexist as that is).
    I know this is kind of offtopic and probably not a response to mrsherlockholmes but how sexist it is depends on what glasses you look at it. If you see a man in complete control and who wishes to dominate his spouse I agree with you. And no NTJ women would even consider being in such a relationship I think. But if you look at it as if the man is the leader and delegates the things out that he is not good at and respects his spouses decision skills its a whole different dynamic in the relationship. I personally have been raised in the conservative way where it is expected of the man to take the lead, but not in a way where I would dominate and control my spouse. It will be a relationship based on common respect and humility when it comes to ones weak spots. Plus for me pragmatic I think that the responsibility of having to take the lead for our relationships wellbeing would be help me develope as a person. So Im looking for a girl that can respect me as much to not take the lead when I fail but encourage me to take the lead.

    So I guess a question to the NTJ females would be if they could see themselves in a relationship as I described? (even if lacking in the right wording)

  7. #7
    nee andante bechimo's Avatar
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    slowriot, taking the lead means being a good decision maker, one that incorporates the well-being of the relationship instead of just self. Juxtapose this against the ENTJ strength and you might find some dissonance. IMO, nurturing isn't our greatest strength.

  8. #8
    He who laughs
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    Okay so you would be totally against my ideals?

    Edit: I could not see myself acting in a selfish way, or Id try to create a forum within the relationship where ideas could flourish and critiqued. I think that Id be a competent decision maker, even if many of my decisions was basically my spouse's ideas. Not meant that Im going to be someone you could manipulate into everything.

  9. #9
    nee andante bechimo's Avatar
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    No, not totally against your ideals. The framework isn't unattractive. I do question some of the motivations and possibilities but much of this is reliant on the individuals involved and their perceptions of what constitutes a relationship, be it complementary, an equal partnership or dom/sub to some extent.

  10. #10
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    Quote Originally Posted by Metaphor View Post
    No, not totally against your ideals. The framework isn't unattractive. I do question some of the motivations and possibilities but much of this is reliant on the individuals involved and their perceptions of what constitutes a relationship, be it complementary, an equal partnership or dom/sub to some extent.
    Yes very so. This is an equal relationship, dom/sub dont appeal to me that much. I made an edit to the last post I made btw.

    Can you elaborate on your questions? (I think I might have taken the thread as a hostage. But I think its interesting to hear the thoughts of the NTJ women on the issues of the OP)

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