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  1. #31
    Consulting Detective Mr. Sherlock Holmes's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Xander View Post
    INTP .... DRAMA????

    KILL THE ABOMINATION LEST HE BREED!!!!
    Hey, it's not so bad. I've done a bit of voice acting for a fan series.

  2. #32
    Member ryb's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by mrsherlockholmes View Post
    Hey, it's not so bad. I've done a bit of voice acting for a fan series.
    You're right, maybe it's just an act.

  3. #33
    i love skylights's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Xander View Post
    INTP .... DRAMA????

    KILL THE ABOMINATION LEST HE BREED!!!!


    Quote Originally Posted by ryb
    You're right, maybe it's just an act.
    this. it's not like e4 drama, not an emo outpouring. more like "this is crap. i don't want to do it. i already know everything i need to know, or will look it up on my own. so i'm going upstairs now. bye." and then mom is NOT happy, but she doesn't want to leave him alone, either.

    i feel like mostly it's difficult INTP-ESFJ interaction.

  4. #34
    Senior Member think2much's Avatar
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    you can't make INTP do something he dislike. If the mother stop helping him than he will fail and won't care. From my experience punishing for not doing schoolwork is a bad idea, taking away internet/computer/games/tv for example won't make him do work. He'll simply find other ways to waste time, the difference is that you are making his life more difficult for not giving him freedom.

    Why is he in IB program? Does he want to be in IB program or is that what you or his mom wants? I was in IB program when I first started high school(caues mom wanted) and after first week I changed all my classes to regular easy classes. If I haven't changed my classes to easy courses I would have never passed high school.

    If you want INTP to be better at school he has to simply want it on his own.

  5. #35
    i love skylights's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by refreshe123d View Post
    you can't make INTP do something he dislike. If the mother stop helping him than he will fail and won't care. From my experience punishing for not doing schoolwork is a bad idea, taking away internet/computer/games/tv for example won't make him do work. He'll simply find other ways to waste time, the difference is that you are making his life more difficult for not giving him freedom.

    Why is he in IB program? Does he want to be in IB program or is that what you or his mom wants? I was in IB program when I first started high school(caues mom wanted) and after first week I changed all my classes to regular easy classes. If I haven't changed my classes to easy courses I would have never passed high school.

    If you want INTP to be better at school he has to simply want it on his own.
    he's not in IB, just has an IB class or two - i think world history, which is pretty standard at his school, and chemistry, which is his favorite subject.

    yeah, i guess he does have to just want it on his own. i think he's getting to that point. i just feel like as long as he can get through to college, he'll be great. he can major in a natural science and LOVE it. but i know how bad it is in the current job market to not even have a GED. people don't want to hire me and i've been working since i was 17 and have a bachelor's and just graduated with honors. his chances of getting employed as HS dropout are about as likely as it raining asparagus.

  6. #36
    Emerging Tallulah's Avatar
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    I don't know--I think you can, as a parent, get an INTP to do something he doesn't want to do, if he respects you and if he understands that life sucks sometimes, and in order to get what he wants, he has to accept some of the crap.

    I would try to appeal to his logical side and help him understand that college is kind of Shangri-la for INTPs, and he can learn about a lot of amazing stuff and set himself up for a better job than McDonald's fry cook. And if he doesn't blow off his courses now, he could get a scholarship, which means he doesn't have to work to put himself through college. (Your mom should by no means allow him to think that she will still pay for his college if he blows his schooling off. He needs to see the value himself.)

    I would use the guitar lessons as an incentive, too. I mean, your parents are the ones with the money, right? If he keeps up with his school stuff, he gets to take guitar lessons, maybe gets a guitar upgrade as a reward down the road.

    It's true that INTPs will let you do the crappy stuff they don't want to do if you take it upon yourself. Your mom needs to stop helping him with his homework. It's enabling his laziness.
    Something Witty

  7. #37
    Senior Member Kenneth Almighty's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by skylights View Post
    he's not in IB, just has an IB class or two - i think world history, which is pretty standard at his school, and chemistry, which is his favorite subject.

    yeah, i guess he does have to just want it on his own. i think he's getting to that point. i just feel like as long as he can get through to college, he'll be great. he can major in a natural science and LOVE it. but i know how bad it is in the current job market to not even have a GED. people don't want to hire me and i've been working since i was 17 and have a bachelor's and just graduated with honors. his chances of getting employed as HS dropout are about as likely as it raining asparagus.
    <_< >_>

    ... I'll get right on it :p

  8. #38
    insert random title here Randomnity's Avatar
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    Natural consequences are the only way (though if they don't work, imposed consequences might be necessary). Even still, he'll have to work hard for the rest of his academic career to get around his ingrained bad habits. Giving him a crutch he doesn't need is going to backfire pretty badly, I would predict.

    My parents would never have dreamed of doing any work for me so I don't know what that's like, but I was only motivated to do homework if it was critical for my final grade (and sometimes not then), and didn't get a job until I was threatened with having to pay rent. It was also ingrained in me my entire life that I wasn't going to university unless I got scholarships, because they couldn't pay for it. And the school did a good job telling us we'd be worthless without university. sooo....

    Bitching about the system isn't going to get him very far though, truth or not. Nobody will accept that as an excuse for bad results.
    -end of thread-

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