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Thread: NT confidence

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    i love skylights's Avatar
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    Default NT confidence

    how do you do that?


    seriously though, most NTs i know project certainty, even when they don't always believe themselves or have totally sure footing. how?

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    Emerging Tallulah's Avatar
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    I think it's mostly because the stuff we know about, we feel confident in. If you hit upon one of our subjects, we can ride that thing for days. Socially, I almost always feel like some sort of alien, but I've learned to fake it and look confident. Over the years, I learned to smile and listen. I guess people project onto you what they want to see.

    I'd say most NTs are pretty confident in their intelligence, too, so even if we're socially awkward, the former could be peeking through, creating the overall impression of confidence.

    Oh! Also, we don't tend to apologize for our thoughts or opinions. You don't hear many NTs saying, "But that's just my opinion, and I could totally be wrong." We just say it, and if someone wants to challenge us, we usually welcome it as food for thought (as long as it's a discussion/exchange of ideas and not a pissing contest). It's just that since we don't couch it in softening terms, some people don't even realize they could challenge us, or that we're open to hearing other sides.
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    Consulting Detective Mr. Sherlock Holmes's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Tallulah View Post
    Oh! Also, we don't tend to apologize for our thoughts or opinions. You don't hear many NTs saying, "But that's just my opinion, and I could totally be wrong." We just say it, and if someone wants to challenge us, we usually welcome it as food for thought (as long as it's a discussion/exchange of ideas and not a pissing contest). It's just that since we don't couch it in softening terms, some people don't even realize they could challenge us, or that we're open to hearing other sides.
    I've learned through experience the danger of not letting people know this so I usually make sure I say it. Just my opinion. Could be wrong.

    And I don't exude confidence unless I really know what I'm talking about and even then I often struggle to express it correctly.

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    Cheeseburgers freeeekyyy's Avatar
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    Intuition + thinking. NFs can also seem very confident, at least in my experience. The difference is that it's a confidence that they are right in their measurement of a person or group's character, rather than confidence in their interpretation of an idea. I'd like to be able to read people that well. Unfortunately, we can't have it all.
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    Quote Originally Posted by freeeekyyy View Post
    Intuition + thinking. NFs can also seem very confident, at least in my experience. The difference is that it's a confidence that they are right in their measurement of a person or group's character, rather than confidence in their interpretation of an idea. I'd like to be able to read people that well. Unfortunately, we can't have it all.
    Hannibal Lecter is NT. You just need to study hard enough.

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    nee andante bechimo's Avatar
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    It's not deliberate. Sometimes it can be frustrating since when you need help, it doesn't come across that way.

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    Honor Thy Inferior Such Irony's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by skylights View Post
    how do you do that?




    seriously though, most NTs i know project certainty, even when they don't always believe themselves or have totally sure footing. how?
    I don't. At least not much of the time. I've often been told that I need to be more confident and not so hesitant or tentative about stuff. I think INTPs are much more prone to self-doubting then the other NT types. I'm always qualifying my statements with disclaimers and stuff.

    I've read NT descriptions where arrogance is listed as one of the weaknesses. Arrogant is one of the last words I'd use to describe myself but I do know some NTs who are quite arrogant.
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    i love skylights's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Tallulah View Post
    It's just that since we don't couch it in softening terms, some people don't even realize they could challenge us, or that we're open to hearing other sides.
    that is very, very true, at least for this NF


    Quote Originally Posted by freeeekyyy View Post
    Intuition + thinking. NFs can also seem very confident, at least in my experience. The difference is that it's a confidence that they are right in their measurement of a person or group's character, rather than confidence in their interpretation of an idea. I'd like to be able to read people that well. Unfortunately, we can't have it all.
    hm, good point. i almost never feel un-confident about my assessment of a person IRL, but i usually seek outside affirmation for my ideas and theories, because i feel like it's sort of natural for those to be contested, and it surprises me when many NTs seem so sure of their own ideas and theories. i suppose that i do not see my own people-handling confidence when i think about these things.

    anyway, i was just reflecting, because i find NT confidence very different from what i feel, and i do really respect it in general. you guys have a logical certainty that really balances me and many others.

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    Quote Originally Posted by suchirony View Post
    I don't. At least not much of the time. I've often been told that I need to be more confident and not so hesitant or tentative about stuff. I think INTPs are much more prone to self-doubting then the other NT types. I'm always qualifying my statements with disclaimers and stuff.

    I've read NT descriptions where arrogance is listed as one of the weaknesses. Arrogant is one of the last words I'd use to describe myself but I do know some NTs who are quite arrogant.
    wow, i really like your avatar... it's like mathematical christmas trees...

    anyway, that's very interesting. my INTP little brother projects arrogance like no other. my ESFJ mom says he's not so arrogant underneath, which i'm starting to believe, but haha wow does he ever put on a good facade.

    not to discount individual difference, of course. props to you for not being arrogant.

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    Quote Originally Posted by skylights View Post
    wow, i really like your avatar... it's like mathematical christmas trees...
    Glad you like it. Its actually Romanesco Broccoli, which I chose because of the beauty of a naturally occurring fractal.
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