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[NT] NT confidence

Kaizer

sophiloist
Joined
Aug 20, 2008
Messages
795
MBTI Type
INTp
Enneagram
5w4
Instinctual Variant
sx/sp
can do very well without makingup or making down
I say out with it
or/preceded by none what so ever
 

Thessaly

I drink your milkshake.
Joined
Jun 5, 2009
Messages
1,363
MBTI Type
xNFP
Enneagram
3w4
That's a generalization! Not all women can't make up their minds, in fact a lot of them can.

I'm guessing you're asking this question because the experiences you've had with women who couldn't make up their minds stand out in your memory- which is a sort of selection bias with the same sort of logic as "I always get shitty hands in poker" or "I always have to wait really long for the bus."

But okay, suppose we refine your question to "why is it that women sometimes don't make up their minds?" You could attribute it to sheer randomness. Men don't always make up their minds, too. Sometimes you make up your mind, sometimes you don't.

Further refinement- "Why does it bother me that women sometimes don't make up their minds?"

I will have to ask, then- does it bother you only when women don't make up their minds? What about if and when men don't make up their minds? Do indecisive men bother you? If so, then the problem is your inability to deal with indecisiveness in general, which is something you can personally work on and transcend. If not, then you may be a bit biased.

The next question to ask is- do women also find other women indecisive? If yes, does it bother them? If no, perhaps they simply want to weigh more options?

Perhaps it is possible that men and women are wired differently, or brought up differently, or more likely, some combination of the two. Women, in the conventional, traditional sense, have to deal with children, one another, and generally more social situations that require the navigation of more nuances and subtleties. As such it should come to no surprise that they are perhaps a little bit more likely to consider more options, and for longer periods of time. Men on the other hand, in the conventional, traditional sense, tend to be in a lot more structured roles that require decisive action. Men are more likely to think "fight or flee" while women are more likely to consider a whole range of alternatives.

Of course, you can never predict individual behaviour. There are and will always be men who are more indecisive than the typical women, and women who are more decisive than the typical man. I would suggest that you worry not so much about people in general (unless that is something you are personally interested in pursuing!) and try to make it a point to communicate effectively to the people in your life you might care about (say your girlfriend, or sister) that you value and would appreciate decisiveness. Find some compromise somewhere.

I can't believe an ENTP just wrote all that out without losing interest or being distracted by a bunny. Most intriguing.
 

Within

Permabanned
Joined
Jan 22, 2010
Messages
1,369
When one arguments empirical facts it's very easy to remain confident. But it really comes down to a matter of opinion. I can say from personal experience that if I decide to argue a topic let's say in class. I have covered most of the facts and my opinion is already forged. Therefore no one has an angle against me that I have not already prepaired for, I can thereby remain confident in my counterarguments towards it. I guess that is what you are refering to as confidence.
 

Lark

Active member
Joined
Jun 21, 2009
Messages
29,569
how do you do that?


seriously though, most NTs i know project certainty, even when they don't always believe themselves or have totally sure footing. how?​

A lot of the time its important. Especially if other people are depending on it.
 

6.4

New member
Joined
Jun 15, 2008
Messages
90
MBTI Type
INTJ
Enneagram
8w9
how do you do that?


seriously though, most NTs i know project certainty, even when they don't always believe themselves or have totally sure footing. how?​

Why should you not be confident? I feel like I naturally have thought of a wide range of outcomes and I have selected the most probable. If new information comes up then lets be confident on the new theory. If you're not confident nothing gets done. I think it also helps my natural ability to see the fundamentals behind a situation. Certainty comes from strong pillars, if you see the strong pillars behind situations, and relate that to where you are now, it would be foolish not to take the strength from that pillar and use it as a battering ram to confidently push forward
 

mysavior

Permabanned
Joined
Sep 30, 2007
Messages
147
MBTI Type
IT
I'm confident exactly 50% of the time. And when I am, I certainly don't look it. Need to work on body language.

I call come-on.
 

skylights

i love
Joined
Jul 6, 2010
Messages
7,756
MBTI Type
INFP
Enneagram
6w7
Instinctual Variant
so/sx
kinda missed the boat on the making jokes, but all i could think while i was reading them was, i prefer making out. :dry:
 

Ghost of the dead horse

filling some space
Joined
Sep 7, 2007
Messages
3,553
MBTI Type
ENTJ
Reading from PUM II, I've thought that different temperaments place their confidence in different things..
 
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