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  1. #21
    ReflecTcelfeR
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    Quote Originally Posted by Tallulah View Post
    I think INTPs can give themselves the illusion that everything is a system to be figured out. That if we work at something from just the right angle, we'll crack the code, and figure out how everything works. This mindset serves us well in many areas, but it doesn't serve us very well in our interactions or in our growth as people. People, including ourselves, aren't problems to fix. It's exhausting to take on the world as a system we have the responsibility of streamlining. Never needing or asking for help or emotional support, because we seldom recognize that we need it. Hence the semi-regular breakdowns. I definitely have them every few years, and rarely see them coming. It's a lesson I have to learn and re-learn, but I'm getting better at realizing I can't do everything, and that it's okay to need help and to lean on others. It's even okay to talk about *gasp* feelings. I'm going to pretend I didn't just say that. :-D
    Yes. This. Though this creates a seperate (though not completely unrelated to this topic) situation. Not many people understand this (your above statement) because of how 'unemotional' I am and so when I do struggle they believe that I'll find my way out of it... even though that is the very problem I'm having. I suppose I just need to give up that pride and ask for it, help that is. I guess my problem is finding that embarrasing .

    It may be the feeling. "If I can't do what I'm suppose to be able to do best i.e. understanding and solving, then what can I do?" Hm, that sounds like an aspect of depression doesn't it?

  2. #22
    Emerging Tallulah's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by ReflecttcelfeR View Post
    Yes. This. Though this creates a seperate (though not completely unrelated to this topic) situation. Not many people understand this (your above statement) because of how 'unemotional' I am and so when I do struggle they believe that I'll find my way out of it... even though that is the very problem I'm having. I suppose I just need to give up that pride and ask for it, help that is. I guess my problem is finding that embarrasing .

    It may be the feeling. "If I can't do what I'm suppose to be able to do best i.e. understanding and solving, then what can I do?" Hm, that sounds like an aspect of depression doesn't it?
    Yeah, I find in my case it does create a depression cycle, and when it gets bad enough, the need for help trumps the need to appear like I don't need it. It kind of humbles me enough to reach out. I wish it didn't have to get to that point, though. I'm working on that.

    I think part of it is being a little more understanding with yourself, too, and realizing that you're not a failure if you do need help. That there is literally no one in the world that is able to do everything perfectly on their own. We sometimes have unrealistic expectations of ourselves.
    Something Witty

  3. #23
    ReflecTcelfeR
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    Indeed! Interestingly enough I watched a movie today about Hinduism. And a famous (recent as well) Guru named Amma. It was insightful. When I wasn't trying to reason the miracles that occured away. I was struck by her speaking about the 'ego' that keeps us (humans) away from enlightenment. To most this idea of giving up individuality is completely backwards in our thinking. The individuality is what keeps us in our pits of circular depression though, and so, in my opinion, that is a good ultimate goal to have.

  4. #24
    meh Salomé's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by ReflecttcelfeR View Post
    I'm burning the candle at both ends, or rather I'm just sticking the whole thing into the fire. So. I will pick just a few things/people and focus me energies. I appreciate the insight.
    Get some sleep. Seriously, sleep is the answer to all of life's problems.

    Quote Originally Posted by ReflecttcelfeR View Post
    It's hard for me to see the point in putting all of this effort into something so superfical. I just want to be able to walk up to a girl and say "Hey, you wanna do somethin'?" and her say "That's fine." The simplicity of the scenario makes me smile.
    Relationships are only superficial with superficial people.
    Everything worthwhile takes effort and that includes putting aside your (the INTP) default dismissive attitude towards others.

    Quote Originally Posted by Tallulah View Post
    Yeah, I find in my case it does create a depression cycle, and when it gets bad enough, the need for help trumps the need to appear like I don't need it. It kind of humbles me enough to reach out. I wish it didn't have to get to that point, though. I'm working on that.
    Perhaps depression is the way we teach ourselves this most important lesson?
    Quote Originally Posted by Ivy View Post
    Gosh, the world looks so small from up here on my high horse of menstruation.

  5. #25
    ReflecTcelfeR
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    Quote Originally Posted by Morgan Le Fay View Post
    Get some sleep. Seriously, sleep is the answer to all of life's problems.

    Relationships are only superficial with superficial people.
    Everything worthwhile takes effort and that includes putting aside your (the INTP) default dismissive attitude towards others.


    Perhaps depression is the way we teach ourselves this most important lesson?
    I suppose I have been starting to use this as a tool for/of pity. I said I never would... In review I used a word I never should have. Thank you.

    P.S. I did sleep wonderful last night.

  6. #26
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    Quote Originally Posted by Tallulah View Post
    I think INTPs can give themselves the illusion that everything is a system to be figured out. That if we work at something from just the right angle, we'll crack the code, and figure out how everything works. This mindset serves us well in many areas, but it doesn't serve us very well in our interactions or in our growth as people. People, including ourselves, aren't problems to fix. It's exhausting to take on the world as a system we have the responsibility of streamlining. Never needing or asking for help or emotional support, because we seldom recognize that we need it. Hence the semi-regular breakdowns. I definitely have them every few years, and rarely see them coming. It's a lesson I have to learn and re-learn, but I'm getting better at realizing I can't do everything, and that it's okay to need help and to lean on others. It's even okay to talk about *gasp* feelings. I'm going to pretend I didn't just say that. :-D
    Well stated! INTPs tend to internalize emotion and we can break when we are not in a supportive, intellectually stimulating, environment.

  7. #27
    As Long As It Takes.... Redbone's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Tallulah View Post
    I think INTPs can give themselves the illusion that everything is a system to be figured out. That if we work at something from just the right angle, we'll crack the code, and figure out how everything works. This mindset serves us well in many areas, but it doesn't serve us very well in our interactions or in our growth as people. People, including ourselves, aren't problems to fix. It's exhausting to take on the world as a system we have the responsibility of streamlining. Never needing or asking for help or emotional support, because we seldom recognize that we need it. Hence the semi-regular breakdowns. I definitely have them every few years, and rarely see them coming. It's a lesson I have to learn and re-learn, but I'm getting better at realizing I can't do everything, and that it's okay to need help and to lean on others. It's even okay to talk about *gasp* feelings. I'm going to pretend I didn't just say that. :-D
    I think this is one of the most beneficial things I've ever read on this forum.

  8. #28
    Senior Member INTPness's Avatar
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    This thread reminds me of a biblical Scipture. The first part of Proverbs 29:18 says, "Where there is no vision, the people perish..."

    Without something to tend to, or put one's energy into, or set out to accomplish with all of one's efforts - a vision of "what it is you are to accomplish in this life", then the "will" dies. The "fight" inside of you, the zest, fades away because there is nothing to go after, nothing to do with one's time but float around aimlessly.
    NTJ's are the only types that have ever made me feel emo.
    ENP's are the only types that have ever made me feel like a sensor.


    There are two great days in a person's life - the day we are born and the day we discover why. --William Barclay

  9. #29
    Member Tecla's Avatar
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    I had a complete breakdown about 7 months ago. It was a combination of not properly dealing with being stabbed , thinking I've figured out the world( and being depressed about what I saw), and feeling absolutely trapped by being in the military. I allowed myself to become so miserable for months on end that I eventually became suicidal. Of course I didn't express this to anyone. It wasn't until I planned and intended to actually do it before I sought help. It ended up with a nice week in a psychiatric ward, which turned out to be a good experience. I was lucky enough to find a therapist that I instantly clicked with and he helped me immensely.

    I guess my point to this is don't allow yourself to spiral down into deep depression. A few days won't hurt, but going unchecked for months can lead to a nasty state of mind. Don't be afraid to ask for help, sometimes a reality check and different perspective can make a huge difference.

  10. #30
    Senior Member ScorpioINTP's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by ReflecttcelfeR View Post
    I don't know exactly what I'm experiencing right now, only that it does not seem 'right'. I just feel like shutting the entire world out so I don't have to care anymore, or pretend to care. I'm cracking under the pressures that this society has created. Have any INTP's felt this way? What did you find it meaning, and how did you fix it? Perhaps this is explained better through enneagram?
    I know this is an old post, but I am new...so My $.02. I know how you feel. I Feel this way often.

    I think and analyze too much for my own good. I feel like I don't fit into society's roles and norms (despite looking/acting fairly normal). The petty and shallow ways in which we all judge each other is sickening. I feel discriminated against for being different, for being introverted, for not being married, for not having kids etc. I don't fit into any one "type" or genre. I generally get along with most people, but I don't click with many on a deeper level and often when I do that person shuts themself off from me or cuts off communication due to their own issues in life (I am going through that recently). It only serves to make you feel more alone...finding real true friends is futile it seems....I guess that was one of my wishes for coming here...unrealistic as it may be.

    When you look at the political, banking, monetary systems (and inherent corruption) and our unsustainable way of living in the US you just wonder when it is all going to implode and wonder to yourself "why bother?". Or perhaps the inevitable asteroid impact or other cataclysm. Well that is definitely irrational I know, but you can't help wondering that the end is getting close. Especially when you click the channel and every other channel is talking about 1)Justin Bieber, 2) Kim Kardashian 3)Sarah Palin like any of them are relevant...meanwhile wealth/power is being consolidated into fewer and fewer hands behind the charade.

    The deeper you analyze our social structure and who is in control and how little control you have over anything the darker it looks and more helpless you feel.

    I feel very alone lately. I feel like no one I care about wants anything to do with me, save for my dogs. The only person who does (my father) merely wants to control and manipulate me while I am down and I want nothing to do with him for the most part. I can't figure out what to do with my life and it pisses me off. I have no one to support me in that either who is objective. I moved to a new city with my GF and 3 mos later (after buying a house together) she wants to split up. So not only am I alone, but alone in a new place and without a job and a mortgage. See, it could be worse!

    Well I need to shut up....This is stupid. Sorry for the rant.

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