Some things are inside my head lately. I wish I could post this on a more ENTP centric forum, but I guess TypoC would do for the mean time.
First of all, I'd have to admit. MBTI message boards give ENTPs an artificial leverage in projecting a certain degree of coolness. Kinda like a game rigged to our favor.
It's a writing medium, and we're right up there with the INTPs and the xNFPs. Another thing--MBTI boards lure more intuitives in proportion to the sensors. Lastly, the writing medium enables us to fully express our wit--arguably the best mode for expressing that area.
MBTI message boards are tailor-made for ENTPs to stand out.
I have a sort of a goal that....uhmm....whatever form of assertion I have online should at least be matched by some real life credentials.
Verbal skills >= Writing skills
Verbal wit >= Writing wit
But let's put some reality check into that:
1. In real life, the average person can't even distinguish a geek from a nerd. My point it, it's a tad silly for an ENTP versus INTP thread to drag for so long. The real world doesn't give a damn about 4 permutations of a rational and another 4 permutations of an NF idealist.
2. We ENTPs all know that we don't really feel like strong extroverts. The social world is dominated by ESTPs, ESFPs, ESFJs and when we socialize with these archetypes, we don't stand out. Ok, we do, but that's because we are that recognizable geek. Our friends see us as extroverts, for sure, but we're not really that loud, socially. I mean, really.
3. We have social preference towards those archetypes that are more socially inept. Like the INFPs, INTPs, maybe INTJs, etc. None of them see the virtue of our "forced" extroversion. ENFJ's do, but they easily sell out and bring in their SF social masks. ENFPs are ok too, but they usually put their NeFi spiritual context into their social lives and it feels like talking with them for a prolonged time is like being compelled to join their "religion". It's ok though. They make good friends. They just sometimes lack our NT edginess.
Sometimes, I feel compelled to "gather" similar intuitive archetypes, and make a social sphere out of it, with me acting as a pseudo leader of the group. It doesn't help that, based on personal experience, intuitives are a very very scattered bunch, and the introverted ones often times don't even want to be gathered to begin with.
Anyone here recognizes these dilemmas?
Over the past few years, I was working hard to develop my Fe. Much of it was driven by my sort of envy with my close ENFJ friend. She's really really good with doing social camouflage. She can really hide her quirks.
Then I realize that putting Fe in full throttle jeopardizes a lot of my other cognitive processes.
I used to be INFP/INTP-ish, eventually turning into an ENTP (probably more Fe driven than Ne). I just eventually realized how Fe is trying to overpower my Ne, Ti, and Fi just for the sake of social political correctness.
I came to an eventual realization that I must treat Fe as a tertiary function if I wanna retain my idiosyncrasies. I just can't be too obsessed with it without sacrificing my other functions.
Has anyone here felt, at some point, a certain feeling of character growth plateau?
Recently, I'm a close friend (non romanticized) to a hardcore mega hedonistic female ESFP who probably slept with dozens of guys already. With a personality like that, hedonism (though not my preferred topic) becomes a common thing to talk about.
ESFP: You're not taking enough risks.
ESFP: You're at the very edge of a cliff. Wanting to overlook the canyon but often times, afraid to jump.
ESFP: Well, at least you're better than our other friend (an INTJ). He doesn't have any sense of fun. At least you wanna learn. You're not that stiff, by comparison. He's a stiff nerd. You're that geek that's...uhmmm...you just know how to explain stuff I couldn't get out of my head.
(For an ESFP with no MBTI knowledge, statements like this is impressive).
Me: I'm not like you
Me: Hedonism is a territory I couldn't really enjoy. My first fling (an ESFP party girl) sure has its sexual perks but I do feel controlled. It's like being that guy in 500 Days of Summer. That kind of controlled. Especially back then, I was more clingy.
ESFP: Your current girlfriend (a non-sexually aware ISFJ. Ok, maybe that's redundant) can't entertain all your wicked sexual fantasies, and now, you have pent-up emotions/energies. You don't wanna cheat on her, so you've morphed into a social mega flirt. That's probably where your pent up emotions are going. Currently, you have better social options, and confidence. BUT YOU STILL DON'T WANNA JUMP THE CLIFF.
Some questions for ENTPs:
1. Can anyone relate with the ESFP conversation?
2. Is your feeling of geekiness (even if you enjoy this trait) prevents you from taking more impulsive risks because you don't have a clear view of how you are perceived?
3. The conversation is obviously a lure for an Se cognitive process development. Recently, I contemplated if that's a kind of character development goal, which, unlike Fe, can probably be developed independently without jeopardizing the other processes. I used hedonism as a simplified analogy. Has anyone of you contemplated about this? Meaning, forced Se growth?
4. What other traits have you taken into "forced" development once you felt that your jack-of-all-trades persona went to a plateau? Is it a crossroad point, compelling you to now take more focus?
5. Have you developed a strong sense of extroversion while keeping Fe a tertiary function? What dine tuning measures did you use?