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  1. #11
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    Quote Originally Posted by runvardh View Post
    A line from Cowboy Bebop comes to mind: "The only cure for stupidity is death!"
    Probably true...

  2. #12
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    Quote Originally Posted by Thessaly View Post
    My mom is a financial moron too. I'm quite mean to her about it. She needs to grow up and I feel verbal lashings are the only way to deal with a child. Sitting down with her to have a proper conversation is really beyond her capabilities.
    Verbal lashings are the only way to deal with a child?
    What child psychology book did you read that says that?

    I don't have the guts to lash out at her like before because I know she REALLY doesn't have any self esteem in this regard. My verbal lashing will not be the last drop that makes her grow balls. It will be just another confirmation that she's hopeless.

    A child with self esteem problems needs to be nurtured and guided with discipline but lots of compassion. She's really like a child in this respect but, well, she's old and no one's got the time or motivation to spend time on her beyond a few hours or days like her friends have done.

    At some level I believe it would be better for her situation to be worse, critical even, because then she would have to do whatever to stay alive and that would make her break free. But the worst situation is a safe local minimum of weakness. That's really easy to break free from.

  3. #13
    Senior Member Moonstone3's Avatar
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    You're goning to have to let her hit bottom and fall, or at least get very close to be scared. I have dealt with many people like this through my life, and that's the only way. It's close to impossible to make another see your perspective...unfortunate, but true.
    What is normal to one, is incomprehensible to another.

    ALL anger in this world stems from a lack of control.


    All of reality bows to the illusion of life and death.

  4. #14
    I drink your milkshake. Thessaly's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by ocean View Post
    Verbal lashings are the only way to deal with a child?
    What child psychology book did you read that says that?

    I don't have the guts to lash out at her like before because I know she REALLY doesn't have any self esteem in this regard. My verbal lashing will not be the last drop that makes her grow balls. It will be just another confirmation that she's hopeless.

    A child with self esteem problems needs to be nurtured and guided with discipline but lots of compassion. She's really like a child in this respect but, well, she's old and no one's got the time or motivation to spend time on her beyond a few hours or days like her friends have done.

    At some level I believe it would be better for her situation to be worse, critical even, because then she would have to do whatever to stay alive and that would make her break free. But the worst situation is a safe local minimum of weakness. That's really easy to break free from.
    A very abrasive and dogmatic child

    I just believe honesty trumps sensitivity when it comes to deteriorating circumstances. If someone has the emotional maturity of a 15 year old and won't take responsibility for their financial well being I lose sympathy quickly.

    Self destructive behaviors shouldn't be tolerated and sometimes you have break people to build them up again.
    With dreamers, pure and simple, the imagination remains a vaguely sketched inner affair. It is not embodied in any aesthetic or practical invention. Reverie is the equivalent of weak desires. Dreamers are the aboulics of the creative imagination.

  5. #15
    I drink your milkshake. Thessaly's Avatar
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    I should add that after I cut my mother to the core I do give her enormous amounts of support.


    [YOUTUBE="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_QjT3u_m3a0"]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_QjT3u_m3a0[/YOUTUBE]
    With dreamers, pure and simple, the imagination remains a vaguely sketched inner affair. It is not embodied in any aesthetic or practical invention. Reverie is the equivalent of weak desires. Dreamers are the aboulics of the creative imagination.

  6. #16
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    Quote Originally Posted by ocean View Post
    She just tested right in between ISFP (vaguely artistic and useless with money) and ISFJ (easy to get stepped on and have no self esteem).
    I love your conclusion, hahahahaaha

  7. #17
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    Quote Originally Posted by slowriot View Post
    I love your conclusion, hahahahaaha
    Are you being sarcastic or are you kissing his ass now?

  8. #18
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    Quote Originally Posted by onceuponatime View Post
    Are you being sarcastic or are you kissing his ass now?
    Im being so sarcastic you wouldnt believe it.

    My ISFJ mother is the strongest woman I know.

  9. #19
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    Quote Originally Posted by ocean View Post
    Verbal lashings are the only way to deal with a child?
    What child psychology book did you read that says that?

    I don't have the guts to lash out at her like before because I know she REALLY doesn't have any self esteem in this regard. My verbal lashing will not be the last drop that makes her grow balls. It will be just another confirmation that she's hopeless.

    A child with self esteem problems needs to be nurtured and guided with discipline but lots of compassion. She's really like a child in this respect but, well, she's old and no one's got the time or motivation to spend time on her beyond a few hours or days like her friends have done.

    At some level I believe it would be better for her situation to be worse, critical even, because then she would have to do whatever to stay alive and that would make her break free. But the worst situation is a safe local minimum of weakness. That's really easy to break free from.
    Your mom is old and has been abused her entire life. I've got an idea - you be a good son and take care of her and quit your bitching.

  10. #20
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    "help my mom she is stupied?" sounds like you are helping with an abrasive manner, no message is going to get across if you are belittling. iif you care about her and what you are communicating actually is being recieved, then it might help the both of you, if you practice not blowing up or being condescending. IS YOUR HELP BECOMING ABUSIVE AND CRUEL?

    Who in here wants to hear someone tell them they are stupied or insulted every thirty seconds in conversation? no "ooo ooo I do`s"?

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