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  1. #1
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    Default NT women and femininity *thread split*

    Quote Originally Posted by tawanda View Post
    I was just curious to see if there are many female NT's out there who either find it difficult to find a relationship, keep a relationship, or just stay interested in relationships in general. Relationships are, in general, challenging, but is it more challenging for you compared to other people you're with? Do you find your friends getting into relationships a lot quicker than you, or is it easier for them, etc.?

    So, do you find it difficult to find a date or keep a relationship in your interest, why or why not?
    I think part of the problem is that the Rationals are generally a more masculine group (well, not INTPs...).

    Just check the statistics -- we're dominantly male.

    The disproportion is ridiculous.

    Anyway, sexual polarity is such that masculinity is attracted to feminity, and feminity to masculinity.

    As such, equipping a female with a masculine personality is like putting a feminine personality in a male (like NF men, for the most part).

    While masculine NT females may feel some kind of sexual attraction for feminine males (due to their sexual polarity), not only are feminine men a smaller percentage of the population (metrosexuals shouldn't be considered feminine, but just neutered, really ) than masculine men, but, perhaps at a deeper, more biological level, even though an NT woman's masculinity may be attracted to femininity (in men, or in women), she may still have instinctual urges to be ravished by a strong, masculine man.

    But this creates a friction, because her masculinity will repel masculine men, like two sexual magnets of the same polar charge.

    And the feminine men who her masculinity might be attracted to, probably won't be able to fulfill all of her instinctual female desires.

    I can only imagine all the difficulties this would cause in romantic relationships.

    Feminine men and masculine women seem kinda just unfortunate in love.

    Kinda sad when you think about it.
    Last edited by Zarathustra; 05-30-2010 at 08:39 PM.

  2. #2
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    Quote Originally Posted by Zarathustra View Post
    I think part of the problem is that the Rationals are generally a more masculine group (well, not INTPs...).

    Just check the statistics -- we're dominantly male.

    The disproportion is ridiculous.

    Anyway, sexual polarity is such that masculinity is attracted to feminity, and feminity to masculinity.

    As such, equipping a female with a masculine personality is like putting a feminine personality in a male (like NF men, for the most part).

    While masculine NT females may feel some kind of sexual attraction for feminine males (due to their sexual polarity), not only are feminine men a smaller percentage of the population (metrosexuals shouldn't be considered feminine, but just neutered, really ) than masculine men, but, perhaps at a deeper, more biological level, even though an NT woman's masculinity may be attracted to femininity (in men, or in women), she may still have instinctual urges to be ravished by a strong, masculine man.

    But this creates a friction, because her masculinity will repel masculine men, like two sexual magnets of the same polar charge.

    And the feminine men who her masculinity might be attracted to, probably won't be able to fulfill all of her instinctual female desires.

    I can only imagine all the difficulties this would cause in romantic relationships.

    Feminine men and masculine women seem kinda just unfortunate in love.

    Kinda sad when you think about it.
    Not as sad as this desperate trolling.
    Quote Originally Posted by Ivy View Post
    Gosh, the world looks so small from up here on my high horse of menstruation.

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    Not trolling.

    If I'm trolling, then I don't quite understand what it means. This would be the first time I've ever been accused of it. Also, forgive me if I'm wrong, but aren't you, like, the defense attorney for trolls?

    These are genuine thoughts.

    I've been having them for awhile, and was just discussing them with my ENFP girlfriend the same day I made that post.

    See, I am an INTJ, and I have an INTJ sister.

    The INTJ archetype is, for the most part, an extremely masculine archetype.

    If I were to rank archetypes on a scale from femininity to masculinity, it would go something like:

    ESFJ/ESFP/ENFP/INFP/ISFP
    ISFJ/INFJ/ENFJ
    INTP
    ISTP/ESTP/ENTP
    ISTJ/INTJ
    ESTJ/ENTJ

    Now, that's not a hard set list (I just made it off the top of my head), and there is undoubtedly variation within each archetype (some XXXXs will be more/less masculine and some will be more/less feminine), but, on the whole, for the overall masculinity/femininity of each archetype, I think it's a decent start.

    Now, I just made that list freehand, without having any working theory in mind, really (other than having already come to the belief that the NTs are a rather masculine group).

    But do you see the obvious dichotomy?

    The top half of the list is all F-types.

    And, after the fact, I, and probably most any reasonable person, would be willing to say that, on the whole, and for the most part, F-types are more feminine, and T-types are more masculine.

    As such, if you believe in sexual polarity (i.e., that the masculine is attracted to the feminine, and the feminine to the masculine), and that men and women can both be more or less masculine/feminine, then, if you're willing to accept my rankings above (perhaps with some subtle changes), then you would have to conclude that NT women, for the most part, and on the whole, are more masculine than most other females.

    As such, due to the problems I mentioned:

    1. Their masculinity will be attracted to femininity, which -- like their own female masculinity -- will tend to be less present in men.

    2. Deep down, even though they have a masculine exterior, there is some femininity inside her, and that femininity ultimately desires a strong masculine man to unleash it, and to ravish it.

    3. But this creates a conflict, because her exterior masculine face will potentially repel masculine men (once again, due to sexual polarity).

    Now I believe the above is true, and so does my ENFP girlfriend.

    So, how about you deal with the ideas, rather than simply accuse someone of trolling who's never been accused of it, and tell us whether you agree or disagree with the ideas above, and why or why not.

  4. #4
    Emerging Tallulah's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Zarathustra
    As such, due to the problems I mentioned:

    1. Their masculinity will be attracted to femininity, which -- like their own female masculinity -- will tend to be less present in men.

    2. Deep down, even though they have a masculine exterior, there is some femininity inside her, and that femininity ultimately desires a strong masculine man to unleash it, and to ravish it.

    3. But this creates a conflict, because her exterior masculine face will potentially repel masculine men (once again, due to sexual polarity).
    You're saying NT women have masculine faces and exteriors? That is possibly the weirdest thing I've read on this forum, and quite far from the truth. I would think most NT women would be hard to tell from other types until you got to know them and interacted with them, understanding their way of approaching the world.
    Something Witty

  5. #5
    Senior Member Uytuun's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Zarathustra View Post
    2. Deep down, even though they have a masculine exterior, there is some femininity inside her, and that femininity ultimately desires a strong masculine man to unleash it, and to ravish it.

    3. But this creates a conflict, because her exterior masculine face will potentially repel masculine men (once again, due to sexual polarity).
    Ahaaaa!

    But what if there's some masculinity in the mostly feminine men that go for the masculine facade?



    Do you pity your sister?

    Quote Originally Posted by Tallulah View Post
    You're saying NT women have masculine faces and exteriors? That is possibly the weirdest thing I've read on this forum, and quite far from the truth. I would think most NT women would be hard to tell from other types until you got to know them and interacted with them, understanding their way of approaching the world.
    Lol, I never even registered that as face, went directly to "facade" - I assume he means energy.

    Femininity is multi-facetted to me...there's girlish whimsical femininity, more nurturing feminity, dark sophistication, free-spirited creation...

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    Quote Originally Posted by Tallulah View Post
    You're saying NT women have masculine faces and exteriors? That is possibly the weirdest thing I've read on this forum, and quite far from the truth. I would think most NT women would be hard to tell from other types until you got to know them and interacted with them, understanding their way of approaching the world.
    Face = Exterior

    I meant "face" metaphorically. Like "mask".

  7. #7
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    Quote Originally Posted by Uytuun View Post
    Ahaaaa!

    But what if there's some masculinity in the mostly feminine men that go for the masculine facade?

    Actually, I think this is precisely the case.

    Quote Originally Posted by Uytuun View Post
    Do you pity your sister?
    In some sense, yes.

    She's an incredibly strong woman, and she's married to a really cool guy, but sometimes she just needs to let go of the ice queen act, chill the fuck out and go with the flow.

    She is incredibly masculine; barely feminine.

    Her husband is a nice mix of both: he's manly, but he's also boy-like.

    His boy-likeness brings the "feminine" aspect into their relationship.

    But you see her femininity sometimes, and it's nice...

    Quote Originally Posted by Uytuun View Post
    Lol, I never even registered that as face, went directly to "facade" - I assume he means energy.
    You are correct.

    Quote Originally Posted by Uytuun View Post
    Femininity is multi-facetted to me...there's girlish whimsical femininity, more nurturing feminity, dark sophistication, free-spirited creation...
    Completely agreed.

    Femininity is multi-faceted; masculinity is singular.

    Hence, this song.

  8. #8
    Emerging Tallulah's Avatar
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    Ah, okay, I gotcha. I don't know that that's true with most NT women, though, as much as people want to start threads about how to spot them, etc. I think most would say I have a pretty overtly feminine exterior, and I get a lot of attention from men who react only to that.

    My problem has not been men who don't think I'm feminine enough. It's been that a lot of them don't challenge or interest me. They don't share my interests, or they think that looking good or having muscles is enough, or whatever.
    Something Witty

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    Quote Originally Posted by Tallulah View Post
    Ah, okay, I gotcha. I don't know that that's true with most NT women, though, as much as people want to start threads about how to spot them, etc. I think most would say I have a pretty overtly feminine exterior, and I get a lot of attention from men who react only to that.

    My problem has not been men who don't think I'm feminine enough. It's been that a lot of them don't challenge or interest me. They don't share my interests, or they think that looking good or having muscles is enough, or whatever.
    This is the part where I come to your side and admit that most men are pathetic wimps.

    Not in the not-big-enough-muscles kinda way, but in the man-child kinda way.

    Luckily, there's a movement underway to make men more masculine again.

    Hopefully it works...

    Stay soft and strong, intelligent sister.


  10. #10
    Senior Member Uytuun's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Zarathustra View Post
    In some sense, yes.

    She's an incredibly strong woman, and she's married to a really cool guy, but sometimes she just needs to let go of the ice queen act, chill the fuck out and go with the flow.

    She is incredibly masculine; barely feminine.

    Her husband is a nice mix of both: he's manly, but he's also boy-like.

    His boy-likeness brings the "feminine" aspect into their relationship.

    But you see her femininity sometimes, and it's nice...
    Why does it bother you if they're happy, though?

    You are correct.
    *points at type*

    Femininity is multi-faceted; masculinity is singular.
    What's your reason for saying masculinity is singular? For one, it can be both wickedly spontaneous and sensual and sharply composed and cold in my experience.

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