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  1. #41
    Tier 1 Member LunaLuminosity's Avatar
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    I believe the real question is: why can't people be more direct?

  2. #42
    Senior Member copperfish17's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by LunaLuminosity View Post
    I believe the real question is: why can't people be more direct?
    This is much easier said than done.



    And it's a rather idealistic sentiment too, IMO.

    It just ain't gonna happen...
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    "Do not argue with an idiot. He will drag you down to his level and beat you with experience." - Greg King
    The worst mistake people make in political arguments is assuming that the other side is not trying to do the right thing. This simple oversight makes productive conversation nearly impossible.

  3. #43
    Senior Member Ming's Avatar
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    I like INTPs for being secretive..

  4. #44
    Widdles in your cream.
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    I'm far from oblivious. *scratches head* As an English major, it's hardwired into me to analyse literary texts, which involves deciphering the symbolic; why did the author choose this word, rather than its synonym? What effect does this have? What are the implications? Naturally, I pick apart the words and actions (or lack thereof) of people I interact with. I think, "They could have done a number of things, or said anything, so why did they choose to X or Y?" Cue the silent brainstorming of possible interpretations. With people I'm interested in, every word and action is picked apart like this, only more obsessively. Until I have conclusive evidence, any interpretation is equally plausible. Thus, I feign obliviousness until confirmation is provided and I can respond accordingly.

    There was this one guy who was pretty underhanded. He decided to play the "nice guy" role and pretend to pursue a friendship with me, whilst dropping ambigous hints. To be honest, I found his lack of directness disgusting. If he was interested in a relationship, being upfront about his feelings from the beginning would have been the best option. The way he went about it was just repulsive, and the most frustating part was that he was obvious enough to make a blip on my radar, but ambigious enough so that I couldn't reject him without looking like a jerk. Throwing hints = FFFFFFUUUUU.

    INTPs, or perhaps any girl, need the pursuer to be direct and honest. Ambiguity leaves room for multiple interpretations, regardless of whether there is requited interest or not.
    Um, yeah.

  5. #45
    Widdles in your cream.
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    Quote Originally Posted by copperfish17 View Post
    This is much easier said than done.



    And it's a rather idealistic sentiment too, IMO.

    It just ain't gonna happen...
    Perhaps if the individual doesn't have a lot of relational experience. It is incredibly hard, especially for those who value self-preservation, but the way I see it is if you don't do anything, then you obviously don't want it enough. I'm pathologically shy, but in the rare instances I'm crazy about someone I bite the bullet and find my own way of indicating interest, ASAP. None of this "friendship" and "waiting" BS. Which involves going against my natural tendencies to over-analyse. Easier said than done. But hey, I'm in a relationship.
    Um, yeah.

  6. #46
    Senior Member copperfish17's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Grungemouse View Post
    ...but the way I see it is if you don't do anything, then you obviously don't want it enough.
    Not too sure if the bolded part is always true. I'm more inclined to say: "if you don't do anything, then you won't get ANYWHERE" (hear that, OP?). Nevertheless, we are in agreement that one should do something if one wants to take a relationship to the next level, so that's cool.

    Quote Originally Posted by Grungemouse View Post
    I'm pathologically shy, but in the rare instances I'm crazy about someone I bite the bullet and find my own way of indicating interest, ASAP.
    Yes.
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    The worst mistake people make in political arguments is assuming that the other side is not trying to do the right thing. This simple oversight makes productive conversation nearly impossible.

  7. #47
    Senior Member ZPowers's Avatar
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    What're you guys talking about?
    Does he want a pillow for his head?

  8. #48
    Senior Member MiasmaResonance's Avatar
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    ._.
    "A spill at the plant increased the phosphates in the lake and produced a scum of algae so thick that the swamp smell filled the air, infiltrating the genteel mansions. Debutantes cried over the misfortune of coming out in a season everyone would remember for its bad smell."

  9. #49
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    Quote Originally Posted by MiasmaResonance View Post
    ._.
    That sums it up.

  10. #50
    Tier 1 Member LunaLuminosity's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by copperfish17 View Post
    This is much easier said than done.



    And it's a rather idealistic sentiment too, IMO.

    It just ain't gonna happen...
    I would think that hinting takes more effort than just saying what is on one's mind. So, the hinting type of indirectness isn't really easier. But if what is meant by indirectness is just straying from what one means to say because one cannot form the words, that is different. I doubt this unavoidable type of indirectness is the subject of this thread though, due to the OP. I don't get 'hinting.' Is it really too much to ask for someone to say what they mean?And if someone wants to get all cryptic, they should not complain that the receiver is oblivious :P

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