User Tag List

First 7891011 Last

Results 81 to 90 of 131

  1. #81
    Senior Member thescientist's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2009
    MBTI
    INTJ
    Enneagram
    5w4
    Posts
    254

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by tawanda View Post
    I was just curious to see if there are many female NT's out there who either find it difficult to find a relationship, keep a relationship, or just stay interested in relationships in general.
    I find it difficult to meet the right person. I think it has to do with my standards. I can tell right away if I will connect with someone or if someone intrigues me. Most of the time...they DONT...so they just immediately go in the "No" pile.

    I can make friends just fine for an INTJ, but relationship material is so difficult to come by. Someone I'm attracted to, physically, mentally and can simultaneously share similar values and interests...does it even exist?

    Maybe my standards are unrealistic?
    Maybe I'm searching for some transcendental elusive connection?
    Maybe I'm meeting too many S's? Sometimes I wish I could escape to a world full of N's...

    I just can't settle for something that doesn't feel 100% right...


  2. #82
    Senior Member thescientist's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2009
    MBTI
    INTJ
    Enneagram
    5w4
    Posts
    254

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by tawanda View Post
    Do you find your friends getting into relationships a lot quicker than you, or is it easier for them, etc.?
    ?
    I dunno. Maybe my E and S friends have an easier time?

    For me, it's not being an NT female that's the issue, it's the awkward introversion plus the NT. I've managed to be much more social over the years to the point where I don't seem like an INTJ when I'm out and about. The problem with this is that I start attracting types that are not really my cup of tea. If I'm my retracted INTJ self while I'm out, I miss out on meeting others and feel like a social outcast. It's like I can't win either way! Guess I need to find that balance...

    The last time that I attracted someone that I had a connection with was when I was being my INTJ self! AT WORK! In my serious, no-bs INTJ mode, oblivious to everyone and everything around me.

    It's not that I'm NOT being myself when I'm out having fun...it's just easier to put on my social hat and not be the wallflower. Even then it's not like I'm outrageously outgoing when doing so. It gets exhausting after a while, and I naturally retract.

  3. #83
    No moss growing on me Giggly's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2008
    MBTI
    iSFj
    Enneagram
    2 sx/so
    Posts
    9,666

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Emectar View Post
    I dated a female entp and i can tell you, (though this may be only in my case) that the reason that it was so frustrating for me was not that i couldn't handle her and thus didn't want to fight to hold on, (we were a total intellectual match, thats what i found most appealing about her actually), its more that her disatatchment and fear of getting to close was hard to live with. I think saying that its because people cant handle you guys is a very entp way of understanding it and possibly pretty innaccurate.
    As cliche as it sounds, my general observation of people is that they always want what they can't have and then when they get it they don't want it anymore. Not implying that NT's always feel this way but maybe some know this instinctually and are naturally guarded.

  4. #84
    meh Salomé's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2008
    MBTI
    INTP
    Enneagram
    5w4 sx/sp
    Posts
    10,540

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by thescientist View Post

    The last time that I attracted someone that I had a connection with was when I was being my INTJ self! AT WORK! In my serious, no-bs INTJ mode, oblivious to everyone and everything around me.
    What's wrong with meeting someone at work?
    I imagine this is pretty common for introverted NTs.
    Quote Originally Posted by Ivy View Post
    Gosh, the world looks so small from up here on my high horse of menstruation.

  5. #85
    Pose! Salt n' pepper's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2009
    MBTI
    ENTJ
    Enneagram
    8w9
    Posts
    2,008

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Morgan Le Fay View Post
    What's wrong with meeting someone at work?
    I imagine this is pretty common for introverted NTs.
    I met mine at work.

    It's a pretty good environment to meet someone and get to know them, without the romantic pressure.

    And watching someone doing something they are good at and like, is pretty attractive.

  6. #86
    meh Salomé's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2008
    MBTI
    INTP
    Enneagram
    5w4 sx/sp
    Posts
    10,540

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Salt n' pepper View Post
    I met mine at work.

    It's a pretty good environment to meet someone and get to know them, without the romantic pressure.

    And watching someone doing something they are good at and like, is pretty attractive.
    True. I much prefer it to perfunctorary socialising.
    I've met a couple of people this way.
    I mostly work with other NTs though so..
    Quote Originally Posted by Ivy View Post
    Gosh, the world looks so small from up here on my high horse of menstruation.

  7. #87
    Permabanned
    Join Date
    Apr 2007
    MBTI
    xkcd
    Enneagram
    9w1 sx/sp
    Socionics
    INT_
    Posts
    10,733

    Default

    So what makes it hard?

    As in, harder than for non-NT women. Expectations of the men? Higher standards?




    Masculinity?

  8. #88
    meh Salomé's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2008
    MBTI
    INTP
    Enneagram
    5w4 sx/sp
    Posts
    10,540

    Default

    Too late! That troll has already been tried. Read the thread, doofus. :p

    Also, assuming an automatic interest in men is a mistake a lot of your sex seem to make.
    Quote Originally Posted by Ivy View Post
    Gosh, the world looks so small from up here on my high horse of menstruation.

  9. #89
    ¡MI TORTA! Amethyst's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2010
    MBTI
    ESTP
    Enneagram
    7w8 so/sx
    Socionics
    SLE Ti
    Posts
    2,182

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by thescientist View Post
    I find it difficult to meet the right person. I think it has to do with my standards. I can tell right away if I will connect with someone or if someone intrigues me. Most of the time...they DONT...so they just immediately go in the "No" pile.

    I can make friends just fine for an INTJ, but relationship material is so difficult to come by. Someone I'm attracted to, physically, mentally and can simultaneously share similar values and interests...does it even exist?

    Maybe my standards are unrealistic?
    Maybe I'm searching for some transcendental elusive connection?
    Maybe I'm meeting too many S's? Sometimes I wish I could escape to a world full of N's...

    I just can't settle for something that doesn't feel 100% right...

    I feel the same way, if something seems 'off', it's off, which has lead to me never having a relationship before and going on many failed first dates. I'd say I'm not entirely picky (aw hell I so am), but there are certain flaws in a guy that I can stand, and those I cannot stand. But then you also have to in the qualities that you like over others...and as you can see I'm really over-thinking this lol.

  10. #90
    Permabanned
    Join Date
    Apr 2007
    MBTI
    xkcd
    Enneagram
    9w1 sx/sp
    Socionics
    INT_
    Posts
    10,733

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Morgan Le Fay View Post
    Too late! That troll has already been tried. Read the thread, doofus. :p

    Also, assuming an automatic interest in men is a mistake a lot of your sex seem to make.
    I would assume, maybe I'm wrong, that the expectations men have of women would be a lot more difficult to handle than the expectations women have of women in relationships.

Similar Threads

  1. [NT] Female NTs and Men: What do you need in a relationship?
    By ListNinja in forum The NT Rationale (ENTP, INTP, ENTJ, INTJ)
    Replies: 156
    Last Post: 08-05-2015, 01:22 PM
  2. [NT] NTs . . . Why are You Messy?
    By Haight in forum The NT Rationale (ENTP, INTP, ENTJ, INTJ)
    Replies: 112
    Last Post: 06-23-2009, 12:24 PM
  3. [NT] Question for NT Women - Are you a feminist?
    By Lauren Ashley in forum The NT Rationale (ENTP, INTP, ENTJ, INTJ)
    Replies: 77
    Last Post: 03-06-2009, 04:48 PM
  4. [NT] NT, How Are You NOT Like Your Type Description?
    By SquirrelTao in forum The NT Rationale (ENTP, INTP, ENTJ, INTJ)
    Replies: 78
    Last Post: 09-27-2008, 05:05 PM
  5. INTJ female (sigh, where are all the others?)
    By creativeRhino in forum Welcomes and Introductions
    Replies: 19
    Last Post: 06-26-2008, 11:44 PM

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
Single Sign On provided by vBSSO