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Thread: The Softer Side of ENTJs

  1. #11
    psicobolche Array tcda's Avatar
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    Nov 2009


    They show a softer side when you are in a common struggle with them and have genuinely earned their respect. One of my best friends is ENTJ, and while he isn't someone who will be touch regularly (like myself), those are things, he's never forgotten.

    On the other hand the ones chronically on cocaine who you happen to be on the opposing side to and repeatedly clash with, aren't so friendly! surprising that.

    PS VI Lenin was an ENTJ. He expelled the party member Bogdanov from the Bolshevik Party many years before 1917 and they denounced each other in the harshest terms. But on the night of the insurrection in Ocotober 1917 he expressed that "if (he) had one regret it was that Bogdanov couldn't be there" and that "surely a finer fellow never existed". I found that moving.
    "Of course we spent our money in the good times. That's what you're supposed to do in good times! You can't save money in the good times. Then they wouldn't be good times, they'd be 'preparation for the bad times' times."

    "Every country in the world owes money. Everyone. So heere's what I dont get: who do they all owe it to, and why don't we just kill the bastard and relax?"

    -Tommy Tiernan, Irish comedian.

  2. #12
    Habitual Fi LineStepper Array JocktheMotie's Avatar
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    Nov 2008


    I suspect most ETJs are judged, rather unfairly, on their occupational styles instead of their individual styles. Socially, they can be quite different and are often a tremendous amount of fun.

  3. #13
    Alchemist of life Array Coriolis's Avatar
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    Apr 2010
    5w6 sp/sx


    I will share a few examples from an ENTJ friend:

    1. I can rely on her when I need her. She regularly gives substantial practical support to other friends and relatives facing some very difficult situations.

    2. She is very concerned about and active in her local community. She donates money, volunteers time, and sets an example by how she lives in order to improve the neighborhood for everyone.

    3. She has no apparent prejudices, and takes people as they are.

    4. I witnessed her sharing her personal grief experiences with an acquaintance who had just lost a parent, providing the kind of emotional support we seldom credit to ENTJs, or NTs in general. (I would not have been nearly as effective, or comfortable, doing it. Perhaps E vs. I, plus she is older and wiser than I am.)

  4. #14
    Senior Member Array
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    Mar 2009


    Quote Originally Posted by JocktheMotie View Post
    I suspect most ETJs are judged, rather unfairly, on their occupational styles instead of their individual styles. Socially, they can be quite different and are often a tremendous amount of fun.
    you react to the world how you perceive the world.

  5. #15
    scourge Array miss fortune's Avatar
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    Oct 2007
    827 sp/so
    SLE Ti


    I had an ENTJ friend who always liked to appear to be the coldly all business type... his dog ran away and was hit by a car and the poor guy was devestated... almost everyone was surprised, I wasn't... I'd already learned that he was a nice guy because if I could make him laugh in an argument he'd usually concede that I had a few good points that I'd made of my own
    Human beings make life so interesting. Do you know that in a universe so full of wonders, they have managed to invent boredom? -Terry Pratchett

  6. #16
    Member Array Amphion's Avatar
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    Apr 2010


    Quote Originally Posted by You'reWrongI'mRight View Post
    If someone hurts someone I care about. All hell will break loose!
    I have witnessed this from my brother (ENTJ). He was fiercely protective of me and my sister growing up. We were untouchable and the few unlucky souls who didn't get the memo paid the price.

  7. #17
    Senior Member Array JHBowden's Avatar
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    May 2009


    He's verbally abusive, impatient, cold-hearted, has no empathy and is ALL BUSINESS..
    I like him already!

  8. #18
    Ghost Monkey Soul Array Vizconde's Avatar
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    Sep 2009


    ENTJ women I have always naturally found sexy yet I had often been somewhat intimidated by them and gave them a wide berth. More recently I have been taking baby steps toward them to discover them better without getting my head bit off. Its kinda like approaching a crocodile or pit bull in that you are best not to show any fear or weakness. If they decide to "shit test" you (and they will) have to pass not only without getting very upset or without becoming a doormat but with high marks.

    If we allow it, then we oddly complement each other and make good partners in crime and have some great laughs.

    In bed they are the best! far.

    Softer side? Hmm yeah they have it. Usually its not on the surface (what appears to be anger pops up more often than any other emotion, an expressive lust perhaps second sometimes immediately after the anger ) except in more extreme circumstances or sometime simply out of the blue it pops up. Usually it is best to be calm and a good active listener when they get like this (although again like a shit test simply pandering is unacceptable in the long term). They may take it out on you at these moments but like being a father of a child having a tandrum...its best to take their barbs without over reacting and slowly guide them to where they can cool their head or otherwise need to come to.

    I redact everything I have written or will write on this forum prior to, subsequent with and or after the fact of its writing. For entertainment purposes only and not to be taken seriously nor literally.

    Quote Originally Posted by Edgar View Post
    Spamtar - a strange combination of boorish drunkeness and erudite discussions, or what I call "an Irish academic"

  9. #19


    Quote Originally Posted by You'reWrongI'mRight View Post
    I know I always say " entj's collect peoples souls cause we don't have our own" ... but honestly...

    It feels really weird saying this.... but.. we have souls too!!

    On the serious note.

    I may come off as too objective, cold, emotionless, and strict at times but My real friends know I'm a kind, understanding, and loving person. I will go out of my way to make life easier for someone I care about deeply.. If someone hurts someone I care about . All hell will break loose!

    Secretly, I'm a total softy... ><! shhhhhhhh

    I'd like to quote myself and add...

    I was just having a conversation with one of my best friend, and I couldn't find the word to describe an " emotion " I had.. she sarcastically added

    "you have emotions???"


  10. #20
    Senior Member Array tinker683's Avatar
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    Nov 2009
    9w1 sx/sp


    I've been attracted to the VERY few ENTJ women I've met in my life but they've wanted to do with me. C'est la vie.

    The mature ones are awesome, good leaders and they have an attitude about business and work that I can get behind really easily.
    "There is no such thing as spare time, no such thing as down time, no such thing as free time, there is only life time. Go."
    ― Henry Rollins

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