[ENTP] Why do ENTPs perceive any form of disagreement as a challenge to an epic duel?

[Thessaly]

I don't get it. We will be casually conversing and then all of a sudden the smallest thing will set him off and I have no idea what is going on. I inadvertently piss him off a million times within 10 minutes of talking.

I am super easy going and have no intentions of starting an argument and when we argue I'm not even aware. To me we are just talking or exploring a topic together. Not only does he perceive 90% of our interactions as arguing, but he thinks I'm insulting his intelligence by not assuming he knows everything in the entire god damn universe. What.The Fudge.

Can someone explain this to me?

 

[Asterion]

I don't get it. We will be casually conversing and then all of a sudden the smallest thing will set him off and I have no idea what is going on. I inadvertently piss him off a million times within 10 minutes of talking.

I am super easy going and have no intentions of starting an argument and when we argue I'm not even aware. To me we are just talking or exploring a topic together. Not only does he perceive 90% of our interactions as arguing, but he thinks I'm insulting his intelligence by not assuming he knows everything in the entire god damn universe. What.The Fudge.

Can someone explain this to me?

Be a jerkbag back, it'd be good practice. He might be doing it for giggles, he might just be dead serious, but either way, if you do it back to him it should fix it right? Probably not... Seems to be a classic case of Fi vs Ti.

 

[Fluffywolf]

they don't see it as a threat like situation or a duel like situation. (At least not at first. They may make a challenge out of it though.)

But I assume you mean their vigor of standing behind their thoughts and ideas.

It's just that their Ne is catching on to things and they're bursting it out like mad, because with Ne, you have to spurt things out, before you've lost it again.

It's like a eurekagasming. (Can we make it into a word, please?)

At least in my discussions with ENTP's, I've always looked at it like that. Never like they are trying to win some duel with me for the sake of winning a duel. It's just that they are coming to thoughts that they had a moment before that not yet reached. And it can be exhilirating.

 

[Thessaly]

It's not actual arguing though. I'll say something that he perceives as me challenging him and he becomes really angry and makes it personal. He basically fights me for not agreeing with everything he says or potentially disagreeing with him. He thinks I argue against everything he says. I usually have no idea that an argument is taking place or what he is talking about and he is downright mean about it.

 

[Fluffywolf]

Well, might just be him. Don't think it's really a typical ENTP thing in particular. Just common indecency from that ENTP, the way you put it.

All ENTP's have a certain dominant like vibe to them though, that's true. But doesn't mean they enjoy abusing that at the cost of others. That's just unhealthy psycholigical behaviour.

Prolly Fe-lacking, immaturity or something.

 

[Little_Sticks]

Does he feel you're being close-minded and is offended by it? There can be two reasons for this

1. You expect him to agree with your conclusions and opinions and this is what frustrates him aside from any arguing.

OR if that's not true then most likely...

2. He thinks what you say is stupid and he needs to respect your desire to talk openly without everything you say needing to be put through an inquisition.

Does this help at all?

 

[Rainne]

I tend not to argue w/ ENTPs. I just nod my head and alternate between "Yeah, you're right.", "Absolutely.", "Yeah.", and "You go girl!"

 

[Fluffywolf]

Granted, I enjoy discussion with ENTP's and can keep up with their general thinking processes. So maybe I experience them in an entirely different light. But the ENTP's I do know, although some can annoy me in other ways, I have no trouble with how they project their ideas and thoughts. And definatly don't see it as some peen contest or whatever.

 

[digesthisickness]

doesn't sound right. i mean debating sounds right, but getting so pissed so fast doesn't.

unless, perhaps, your style of speaking has been grating on him for a long time, and he's been holding it in, and now he just doesn't give a shit anymore.

 

[Thessaly]

Does he feel you're being close-minded and is offended by it? There can be two reasons for this

1. You expect him to agree with your conclusions and opinions and this is what frustrates him aside from any arguing.

OR if that's not true then most likely...

2. He thinks what you say is stupid and he needs to respect your desire to talk openly without everything you say needing to be put through an inquisition.

Does this help at all?

Yes. Thank-you.

 

[Kasper]

What digest said. Debating is never seen as arguing in my eyes, others often perceive it as such though. Doesn't sound right.

 

[YoungGun2112]

Debating does not equal an argument to an ENTP. Perhaps you are perceiving it that way.

However, if he is getting personal, then he is likely just an immature person instead of only exhibiting ENTP characteristics. ENTPs like to argue, yes, but the mature ones know their limits and how to stay within them. Its his issue, not the issue of ENTPs at large.

I used to personally critique someone during the course of discussion when my Ne caused me to see some flaw in a person's thoughts or personality that did or would affect their lives. Usually I was trying to help that person. Eventually I realized, and most other ENTPs do at some point too, that it doesn't work and the argument is not worth it. He seems to have not developed Fe yet. How old is he?

When I am excited about something I am thinking, I can have a tendency to start talking faster, raising my voice, and trying to get everything out that is running through my mind at once even if it means interrupting others, and it often comes off to people as me being upset. Perhaps that is happening too.

 

[murkrow]

Gotta love how they've provided examples for you.

 

[Craft]

Could be weak Si? The possible pride he feels that is "supposedly" himself consistently correct. The pride of "correct" one.

 

[sculpting]

they don't see it as a threat like situation or a duel like situation. (At least not at first. They may make a challenge out of it though.)

But I assume you mean their vigor of standing behind their thoughts and ideas.

It's just that their Ne is catching on to things and they're bursting it out like mad, because with Ne, you have to spurt things out, before you've lost it again.

It's like a eurekagasming. (Can we make it into a word, please?)

At least in my discussions with ENTP's, I've always looked at it like that. Never like they are trying to win some duel with me for the sake of winning a duel. It's just that they are coming to thoughts that they had a moment before that not yet reached. And it can be exhilirating.

That's an awesome word!

doesn't sound right. i mean debating sounds right, but getting so pissed so fast doesn't.

unless, perhaps, your style of speaking has been grating on him for a long time, and he's been holding it in, and now he just doesn't give a shit anymore.

Debating does not equal an argument to an ENTP. Perhaps you are perceiving it that way.

However, if he is getting personal, then he is likely just an immature person instead of only exhibiting ENTP characteristics. ENTPs like to argue, yes, but the mature ones know their limits and how to stay within them. Its his issue, not the issue of ENTPs at large.

I used to personally critique someone during the course of discussion when my Ne caused me to see some flaw in a person's thoughts or personality that did or would affect their lives. Usually I was trying to help that person. Eventually I realized, and most other ENTPs do at some point too, that it doesn't work and the argument is not worth it. He seems to have not developed Fe yet. How old is he?

When I am excited about something I am thinking, I can have a tendency to start talking faster, raising my voice, and trying to get everything out that is running through my mind at once even if it means interrupting others, and it often comes off to people as me being upset. Perhaps that is happening too.

yes to all this-debating for entps is always fun, a bit pointed, quick, and highly entertaining for them (and me but I am a little odd). But not mean or nasty-at least not on purpose. Is it about specific topics or just topics you happen to stumble across?-Id say if it was repeated on a specific topic, that sounds personal, not fun.

 

[1487610420]

Either misperception on your part, immaturity on his, or something subliminal.

 

[Shimmy]

I don't get it. We will be casually conversing and then all of a sudden the smallest thing will set him off and I have no idea what is going on. I inadvertently piss him off a million times within 10 minutes of talking.

I am super easy going and have no intentions of starting an argument and when we argue I'm not even aware. To me we are just talking or exploring a topic together. Not only does he perceive 90% of our interactions as arguing, but he thinks I'm insulting his intelligence by not assuming he knows everything in the entire god damn universe. What.The Fudge.

Can someone explain this to me?

ENTPs are not generally people who are pissed of easily. I like to debate though, and recently I found out it's very funny to throw people of by making personal comments (but never insults or attacks).

 

[Virtual ghost]

Because they are interesting and cool people

 

[Gamine]

DUEL!!

Are you being condescending? That's the only way I think you can insult him when you are both apparently exploring a topic together. Have you ever asked him what is going on?

People who are condescending to me who I do not need to have harmony with for work are treated in kind.

 

[Thessaly]

DUEL!!

Are you being condescending? That's the only way I think you can insult him when you are both apparently exploring a topic together. Have you ever asked him what is going on?

People who are condescending to me who I do not need to have harmony with for work are treated in kind.

He perceives me to be condescending merely by not assuming he knows everything in the entire world. He genuinely feels talked down to the moment I explain anything, including my feelings.