[NT] What do INTPs and INTJs think about each other?

[ZPowers]

I have an INTP boyfriend. I think, if I had not met him when he was drunk, and if my interest in him . . . we would not have had a chance to intrigue each other enough to get to an actual date.

Drunk INTP = As able to converse freely as most sober people.

 

[MacGuffin]

INTPs can find INTJs to be killjoys, and INTJs can find INTPs to be immature.

 

[INTPness]

I have an INTP boyfriend. I think, if I had not met him when he was drunk, and if my interest in him had not been piqued by a mutual friend (who just thought we would get along well), we would not have had a chance to intrigue each other enough to get to an actual date.

That's exactly it. Great pairing, but in most cases they never allow each other close enough to start a friendship/relationship.

Where we have disconnects are things like planning/organizing. I am an extremely organized list maker. I'm not sure we could take a long vacation together without his laid back, whatever attitude giving me an anxiety attack. Or I might have 4-5 things to do this weekend, and am accused of "loading up his day with tasks."

I can relate to this a lot. I've had this "issue" with many different J's. To this day, I still do not get the concept of someone else deciding my agenda. "Guess what? We're doing these 5 things this weekend!"

INTP: "Really? Says who? How about we drop those 5 arbitrary things from our "list" and you let me come up with 5 things that we will be doing this weekend."

The INTP's I've known have almost ZERO desire to dictate another person's agenda and/or to have our agenda dictated. Love INTJ's, but that's where the INTP's might get prickly and start resembling a hedgehog.

Also, I like to logically talk through and resolve a disagreement, with tasked actionable items as appropriate. He get frustrated and needs to get away from the discussion and hibernate for a period of time, with no need to resolve things right away.

I'm all about talking through a disagreement and coming to a resolution, so long as it's done in an efficient manner. I don't have time to sit down for hours hashing through the same ol' thing. And then again next week. Let's come to an agreement and move on with our day (enjoy life a little bit). And I would think INTJ's would be great at doing that - hashing it out quickly and efficiently (getting to the point), rather than dragging it out all day. Is your INTP conflict avoidant?

 

[Rainne]

INTJ: "Why do you do something w/ all that knowledge!?"
INTP "Jerk."

 

[EffEmDoubleyou]

INTP: "Really? Says who? How about we drop those 5 arbitrary things from our "list" and you let me come up with 5 things that we will be doing this weekend."

That course of action would result in doing nothing this weekend.

 

[INTPness]

That course of action would result in doing nothing this weekend.

Now that's the best suggestion I've heard so far!

But yeah, you're pretty much right. And that's one of the big problems with the pairing.

From the INTP's perspective though, we are never doing "nothing". It's so key for our partners to understand this. We are constantly engaged in something mental. Even if I'm doing something lame like watching TV, the wheels are spinning. Whatever we are doing, we are engaged - to us, we are absolutely doing something. And other people's plans (when imposed on us) sometimes feel like a distraction to that. It makes us difficult, I know. I don't mind disengaging to go spend time with someone, but it won't be simply because someone decided that's what I should do today. I like to decide those things for myself.

When my ESFJ ex used to bug me to "do this" or "do that" with her when I was "busy doing nothing" (as she called it), I would say, "How about for the rest of the day, you do you and I'll do me. Then, at the end of the day, we'll get together and discuss what we did. It'll be real fun because, by that time, we'll miss each other a little bit." Sounds horrible in hindsight.

 

[ZPowers]

That course of action would result in doing nothing this weekend.

But you get to do it FIVE TIMES!

 

[Nizy]

The only INTJ I know very well has been my friend since we were kids. We get along well generally. I do most of the planning, yet somehow he seems to make the decisions most of the time. If that makes any sense. It annoys me sometimes how rash his decision making can be, and how set he can be in those decisions. Usually I just go along with whatever he comes up with regardless of how I feel about it until we reach a point where I feel like I need to reorient him before his decisions lead him to do something really stupid. In fact he has commended me for this ability(to set him straight) in the past.

 

[Unique]

I tend to let them take the lead, they make the decisions and I think about them, often I like their decisions over other types

 

[Craft]

INTJ: yes very great experience with this type. I like it how they bounce their ideas for me to analyze.

INTP: neve' meht one.

 

[freedom geek]

I'm on the boarder, perhaps slightly on the INTJ side but I greatly like both types. Romantically I'm attracted to both INTJs and INTPs provided they meet other, non type based, requirements although the only fictional girl I have every been attracted to, Kimiko Ross from Dresden Codak, is an INTP.

 

[MacGuffin]

I'm on the boarder, perhaps slightly on the INTJ side but I greatly like both types. Romantically I'm attracted to both INTJs and INTPs provided they meet other, non type based, requirements although the only fictional girl I have every been attracted to, Kimiko Ross from Dresden Codak, is an INTP.

The only fictional girl you've been attracted to is a cartoon?

That's pretty fucked up INTJ.

 

[freedom geek]

The only fictional girl you've been attracted to is a cartoon?

That's pretty fucked up INTJ.

She has most of the mental qualities I want (however if she wants (human) children then all that attraction is gone). Qualities which I have not seen collected as such in non-cartoon characters.

While it is an INTJ thing would you say I would be correct to say that it would also be fitting for an INTP or is this evidence that I am a stronger INTJ than I think?

 

[tcda]

She has most of the mental qualities I want (however if she wants (human) children then all that attraction is gone). Qualities which I have not seen collected as such in non-cartoon characters.

While it is an INTJ thing would you say I would be correct to say that it would also be fitting for an INTP or is this evidence that I am a stronger INTJ than I think?

Not for this INTP...I'm attracted to most non-cartoon fictional female characters I see on TV, and not attracted to any cartoon ones, nor could I ever envisage being so...

 

[freedom geek]

Not for this INTP...I'm attracted to most non-cartoon fictional female characters I see on TV, and not attracted to any cartoon ones, nor could I ever envisage being so...

That could easily be explained by your weak N which this sort of thing seems to rest heavily on or do you just have your type listed as istp as an April fools joke?

 

[Craft]

April fools joke?

Why I didn't notice...

I think perhaps I might qualify for INTP. And what I have is that same infatuation to some fictional characters. It's not difficult to believe in the possibility of their existence in another dimension. yet I do prefer beings I can converse with...

 

[freedom geek]

Why I didn't notice...

I think perhaps I might qualify for INTP. And what I have is that same infatuation to some fictional characters. It's not difficult to believe in the possibility of their existence in another dimension. yet I do prefer beings I can converse with...

Oh, I'd definitely prefer someone I could interact with, I'm not like that guy who married that fictional character, but I can see that if I could interact with her I would probably like her and in the absence of someone who meets my requirements that I can interact with I might as well like her.

 

[Craft]

Oh, I'd definitely prefer someone I could interact with, I'm not like that guy who married that fictional character, but I can see that if I could interact with her I would probably like her and in the absence of someone who meets my requirements that I can interact with I might as well like her.

yes yes? relationships are all about formal communication and discussions? no room for feelings?

 

[freedom geek]

yes yes? relationships are all about formal communication and discussions? no room for feelings?

I do not see how I suggested that in my post. I believe I have feelings for Kimiko and I believe a similar thing would occur if I could interact with someone quite like her.

 

[Craft]

I do not see how I suggested that in my post.

They were simply questions. yes.

I believe I have feelings for Kimiko and I believe a similar thing would occur if I could interact with someone quite like her.

Sadly, I don't think it hints anything regarding your P/J.