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Thread: NTs and love

  1. #41
    A passer by yvonne's Avatar
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    ^ lol, exactly. it's amazing how much i relate to things people have said on this thread.

  2. #42
    pathwise dependent FDG's Avatar
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    How can people say that love is a choice? It's something that has always baffled me :S
    ENTj 7-3-8 sx/sp

  3. #43
    Black Magic Buzzard Kra's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by FDG View Post
    How can people say that love is a choice? It's something that has always baffled me :S
    Depends on your definition of love I guess.

    For me, love is always a choice. Attraction is not. But, just because hormones are raging doesn't mean I'm in love.

    It's probably different for everyone though.
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  4. #44
    @.~*virinaĉo*~.@ Totenkindly's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by FDG View Post
    How can people say that love is a choice? It's something that has always baffled me :S
    Define love.
    "Hey Capa -- We're only stardust." ~ "Sunshine"

    “Pleasure to me is wonder—the unexplored, the unexpected, the thing that is hidden and the changeless thing that lurks behind superficial mutability. To trace the remote in the immediate; the eternal in the ephemeral; the past in the present; the infinite in the finite; these are to me the springs of delight and beauty.” ~ H.P. Lovecraft

  5. #45
    pathwise dependent FDG's Avatar
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    Nah I won't, let's not get into pendantic discussions. Everybody knows what love means, except when everybody goes on internet forums.
    ENTj 7-3-8 sx/sp

  6. #46
    man-made neptunesnet's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Kra View Post
    For me, love is always a choice. Attraction is not.
    Wait. You believe you can't become attracted to someone over time? So, do you think attraction is unyielding, a constant, and has nothing to do with the influence of external factors like culture or upbringing?

    I assumed you meant physical attraction here.

  7. #47
    @.~*virinaĉo*~.@ Totenkindly's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by FDG View Post
    Nah I won't, let's not get into pendantic discussions. Everybody knows what love means, except when everybody goes on internet forums.
    *eyeroll*

    It's not pedantic.

    The most OBVIOUS reason we're not in agreement is because you're probably defining love differently.
    Don't bother asking a question that you're not willing to pursue.

    * * * *

    EDIT: Ha, just got this junk e-mail a second ago, and here's the opening lines:

    Has a man ever said to you,

    "I love you, but I'm just not IN LOVE with
    you anymore. I'm sorry but it's over"...

    And then told you it's over because he just
    doesn't "feel it" for you anymore?
    "Hey Capa -- We're only stardust." ~ "Sunshine"

    “Pleasure to me is wonder—the unexplored, the unexpected, the thing that is hidden and the changeless thing that lurks behind superficial mutability. To trace the remote in the immediate; the eternal in the ephemeral; the past in the present; the infinite in the finite; these are to me the springs of delight and beauty.” ~ H.P. Lovecraft

  8. #48
    Ghost Monkey Soul Vizconde's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Jennifer View Post
    EDIT: Ha, just got this junk e-mail a second ago, and here's the opening lines:
    Where was that email when I was writing my Valentines.

    But I agree the question on what is love is not pedantic. There might be something in this thread to assist http://www.typologycentral.com/forum...at-love-4.html

    How were you defining love Jen?
    I redact everything I have written or will write on this forum prior to, subsequent with and or after the fact of its writing. For entertainment purposes only and not to be taken seriously nor literally.

    Quote Originally Posted by Edgar View Post
    Spamtar - a strange combination of boorish drunkeness and erudite discussions, or what I call "an Irish academic"

  9. #49
    Black Magic Buzzard Kra's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by neptunesnet View Post
    Wait. You believe you can't become attracted to someone over time? So, do you think attraction is unyielding, a constant, and has nothing to do with the influence of external factors like culture or upbringing?

    I assumed you meant physical attraction here.
    Yes, the physical, first-impression kind of attraction. Though really, even non-physical attraction applies, since attraction and love are not the same thing to me.

    I may become attracted to someone over time, but I have to decide to trust them before I can love them. That's all I meant.

    Well, outside of that vague, altruistic kind of love anyway.
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  10. #50
    Senior Member INTPness's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by bcvcdc View Post
    I hope I'm not misinterpreting your post here, but imo, this sort of behavior, quoting your own words: ("Because I love you, I will not enable you. If you want to hang out and talk, give me a ring. But, if you're calling to borrow money, don't bother. It's not going to happen. You need to grow up and learn to take care of yourself and your own finances and I absolutely will not be one to enable you.) is ok if the person is only a lazy bum or just really taking advantage of somebody who deeply cares about them, but it's NOT ok if the person is very sick, and by this i mean unable to care properly for themselves without some sort of assistance from others (mostly family). Do you disagree?
    I agree with you. In this case, the person is totally healthy and able and continues to take advantage of people while not holding down one of those things called a "j-o-b". Basically it's like, "there is no career that I like or am satisfied in, therefore, I need your help to pay my rent and ensure that I have food to eat."

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