[NT] At the bar... (more social situations!)

[Tiltyred]

*wail* o ye gods, not only a bar, but a bar full of lawyers?? What did you do wrong in your past lives?

 

[onemoretime]

Discovered alcohol, I think

 

[Mad Hatter]

Discovered alcohol, I think

Which makes no difference if you can't drink anyway

Really I mean, if it's networking, then it's work. And work isn't supposed to be fun, but mindless and boring.
Just change your attitude.

 

[iamathousandapples]

why cant you just do this?

indeed. I'll pass out, thank you very much.

 

[onemoretime]

Really I mean, if it's networking, then it's work. And work isn't supposed to be fun, but mindless and boring.
Just change your attitude.

This statement is incomprehensible to an ENTP. If it's not supposed to be fun, then why bother?

 

[Timeless]

Networking, mostly.

You know how well Ne-fueled speech usually goes over around ESxJs and xSFPs.

Okay, networking for what ultimately?

Help you land a job? Have the "go-to" guy to party with? Spit politics with? Get a girl? Have study buddies with? Computer Hackers Anonymous? Go over Elephant photographs for National Geographic with?



If you're networking, just to network, then that's like buying maps of every state in the U.S. with no intention at all to ever visit them. That's a singularity, not networking.

Once you know what the goal is; small talk doesn't have to be apart of the program. Instead of thinking of small talk as something to shoot down or "deal with" like a wall, just find the door; everybody has one.

And that freaking door will appear once you know what you're looking for.

Rock and roll!

 

[Tamske]

Chances are, when you are networking in a place you don't feel comfortable, you won't find the right people for you.
When I was younger, I didn't frequent the popular bars, because the people there were people who liked small-talk, thus they were not the people I'd want to be friends with. Instead, I went to a particular bar with a stack of board games and playing classical music. Chances are, the people there like classical music and/or board games, just like I do. Sharing an interest makes good friends.

 

[jenocyde]

... no bar games, you can't leave, and there's nothing to do but small talk.

How do you keep from drinking yourself into oblivion to escape the boredom?

I just play little games inside my head. Counting how many times that guy in the red sweater says "duuuuuude". Trying to make mnemonics out of people's names. Predicting who that blond girl is going to try flirting with when she gets all liquored up. Walk around and listen to snippets of different conversations, pretending it's one weird conversation, like mad libs. Try to see what time it is on every person's watch before the end of the night.

I don't know. I'm not good with boredom or being stuck.

 

[onemoretime]

I just play little games inside my head. Counting how many times that guy in the red sweater says "duuuuuude". Trying to make mnemonics out of people's names. Predicting who that blond girl is going to try flirting with when she gets all liquored up. Walk around and listen to snippets of different conversations, pretending it's one weird conversation, like mad libs. Try to see what time it is on every person's watch before the end of the night.

I don't know. I'm not good with boredom or being stuck.

Good ideas - doing stuff like that is when I'm at my best.

 

[Mad Hatter]

This statement is incomprehensible to an ENTP. If it's not supposed to be fun, then why bother?

Why bother indeed. If you're going to a bar where having fun and networking are mutually exclusive, you just have to decide what's more important to you.
Plus what Tamske said (i.e. finding a place where they aren't).

 

[yenom]

Pull out a gun and tell everyone to give you money.

 

[alakazam]

Pull out a gun and tell everyone to give you money.

Hmmmm. Adrenaline-inducing and interesting? Sure, for a short period of time... Logical? Perhaps not...

Now, pulling out a gun and telling everyone to give you their girls, now that's a different story.

 

[tinkerbell]

I don't mind bars, it's clubs I hate. I enjoy chatting about ideas, life and the universe in a reasonably chilled way... not to good with total strangers in that capacity

 

[JustHer]

Leave my table and go sit with another group of neat folks

 

[astroninja]

... no bar games, you can't leave, and there's nothing to do but small talk.

How do you keep from drinking yourself into oblivion to escape the boredom?

I'd rather be flirting at the library. Nothing turns me on more than a girl flipping the pages of a book I love. Certainly better than getting flipped off for being an awkward social mingler.

This is me at the bar.

INTP: "Hey there, I'm an INTP!"
ESFP: "A what? What's that?"
INTP: "Shut up and drink your cocktail, bitch!"

 

[visaisahero]

OP: so have you learnt anything here that you're going to apply the next time around?