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  1. #1
    Dreaming the life onemoretime's Avatar
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    Default Older NTs - question

    When you're in a social situation where it seems like it's going to be nothing but boredom, you can't come up with a decent means of conversation to save your life, and sticking around will leave a bad impression - how do you bail out gracefully?

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    Gotta catch you all! Blackmail!'s Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by onemoretime View Post
    When you're in a social situation where it seems like it's going to be nothing but boredom, you can't come up with a decent means of conversation to save your life, and sticking around will leave a bad impression - how do you bail out gracefully?
    If you mean, spending an evening with the family of my brother's wife... ?

    Well... Either:

    1/ I forget myself with a good book, or a good theoretical puzzle to solve. This way I'll ignore the rest of world around me. Works especially well for introverts or if you have a very exciting competition to plan ahead.

    2/ I find a lame excuse to quit the scene. Most sophisticated excuses are the ones where the audience seem only partly responsible for your sudden departure. Don't hesitate to be dramatic, to invent a situation that looks really out of the ordinary, because -> ordinary excuses never work, and always attract suspicion ->it will be easier to remember, if you have to play this comedy once again.

    3/ Pretend you were busy and that you have completely forgotten you had a dinner with them. Even if you're not the kind of person that forgets schedules, sometimes it's useful to forget them on purpose, and get the reputation generally associated with that light behaviour. This way, people do not feel offended because you despise them (true reason), but rather because they can blame your "legendary forgetfulness" (imaginary reason). It's less worst, if you understand what I mean. They won't feel threatened, and hence, may behave less aggressively.

    4/ Mix the three previous solutions. But always remember to never hesitate to cheat, lie, and be amoral if necessary. After all, if what they can offer you is only boredom THEY deserve it, not you.
    "A man who only drinks water has a secret to hide from his fellow-men" -Baudelaire

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    @.~*virinaĉo*~.@ Totenkindly's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by onemoretime View Post
    When you're in a social situation where it seems like it's going to be nothing but boredom, you can't come up with a decent means of conversation to save your life, and sticking around will leave a bad impression - how do you bail out gracefully?
    Usually I just make up an excuse -- something believable.

    - Tired and have a busy day tomorrow.
    - Need to make some phone calls and/or do some more errands before the day runs out.
    - Getting a headache.

    Usually it's the first two, and I *do* actually do the errands and/or make the calls etc. There are lots of reasonable excuses to cut something shorter, as long as you've already put in a little time.

    Let's face it, the party doesn't revolve around us. It's okay if we leave. People will survive. Typically the response is, "Aw, bum, wish you could stay longer, hope you get everything done," and life moves on.

    If you want drama, it can be the "OMG I JUST GOT A TEXT, MY FRIEND'S WIFE / MY FRIEND IS HAVING A BABY AND I HAVE TO GO THEY NEED HELP!!!"
    "Hey Capa -- We're only stardust." ~ "Sunshine"

    “Pleasure to me is wonder—the unexplored, the unexpected, the thing that is hidden and the changeless thing that lurks behind superficial mutability. To trace the remote in the immediate; the eternal in the ephemeral; the past in the present; the infinite in the finite; these are to me the springs of delight and beauty.” ~ H.P. Lovecraft

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    Senior Member tinkerbell's Avatar
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    If I can I avoid the situation all together, make and excuse not to be there (and I can be damned unsocial at times).

    If I absolutely have to be there, I tend to be a bit withdrawn and chat in the kitchen or out the way.

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    @.~*virinaĉo*~.@ Totenkindly's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by tinkerbell View Post
    If I absolutely have to be there, I tend to be a bit withdrawn and chat in the kitchen or out the way.
    That's another option.

    Sometimes I'll just say I'm tired and I sit in a corner and listen to other people talk... or watch TV with people if they are doing that, or watch the kids play, etc.

    You can also go hide out in the bathroom, or say you need a breath of air and go outside and not come back for awhile.
    "Hey Capa -- We're only stardust." ~ "Sunshine"

    “Pleasure to me is wonder—the unexplored, the unexpected, the thing that is hidden and the changeless thing that lurks behind superficial mutability. To trace the remote in the immediate; the eternal in the ephemeral; the past in the present; the infinite in the finite; these are to me the springs of delight and beauty.” ~ H.P. Lovecraft

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    Gotta catch you all! Blackmail!'s Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Jennifer View Post
    Let's face it, the party doesn't revolve around us. It's okay if we leave. People will survive. Typically the response is, "Aw, bum, wish you could stay longer, hope you get everything done," and life moves on.
    And what if you're not a lonely, discreet introvert, and that the party precisely revolves around us? Hmm?
    "A man who only drinks water has a secret to hide from his fellow-men" -Baudelaire

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  7. #7
    I'm a star. Kangirl's Avatar
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    Just make up a lie. That's what I do.
    "Only an irrational dumbass, would burn Jews." - Jaguar

    "please give concise answers in plain English" - request from Provoker

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    Senior Member tinkerbell's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Jennifer View Post

    You can also go hide out in the bathroom, or say you need a breath of air and go outside and not come back for awhile.
    In the UK thats a big choice cost you know it's gonna be freezing outside, even in mid sumer

    Actually I don't always avoid parties, sometimes I possitively enjoy them....

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    @.~*virinaĉo*~.@ Totenkindly's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Blackmail! View Post
    And what if you're not a lonely, discreet introvert, and that the party precisely revolves around us? Hmm?
    Sorry, Blackmail... I wasn't thinking of you, of course, when I said all of that!
    "Hey Capa -- We're only stardust." ~ "Sunshine"

    “Pleasure to me is wonder—the unexplored, the unexpected, the thing that is hidden and the changeless thing that lurks behind superficial mutability. To trace the remote in the immediate; the eternal in the ephemeral; the past in the present; the infinite in the finite; these are to me the springs of delight and beauty.” ~ H.P. Lovecraft

  10. #10
    Senior Member Qre:us's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Kangirl View Post
    Just make up a lie. That's what I do.
    Sounds legit.

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