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[INTP] Ask an INTP thread!?

Faine

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I don't know if this question is really suitable for this thread, but what the heck; I'll ask it anyway and you can all burn me at the stake later if you feel like it. So, the question is: if you had romantic feelings towards someone you'd been friends with for years, but lived far away from, and weren't sure if they felt the same way... what would you do about it?
(This question may or may not be related to circumstances in my own life. Shhh.)

:mellow:

On a less personal note: in a world where you didn't have to work for a living and had everything you needed to survive comfortably, what would you want to do with your life? What would make you happy?
 

Fluffywolf

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I don't know if this question is really suitable for this thread, but what the heck; I'll ask it anyway and you can all burn me at the stake later if you feel like it. So, the question is: if you had romantic feelings towards someone you'd been friends with for years, but lived far away from, and weren't sure if they felt the same way... what would you do about it?
(This question may or may not be related to circumstances in my own life. Shhh.)

:mellow:

On a less personal note: in a world where you didn't have to work for a living and had everything you needed to survive comfortably, what would you want to do with your life? What would make you happy?

From any long distance, INTP's have no problem being honest about their feelings. The issues arise when the subject of romance is near the INTP. I would be all over the subject('s digital life).

As per the second question. I would likely waste my time on watching movies, masturbation, tv shows, anime's, masturbation, computer games, fantasy novels, masturbation and after all that, some more masturbation would suffice.
Oh yes, a man can have dreams...
 

Oaky

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Do INTPs enjoy some of their thoughts grounded down to reality and made into a particular things that can be experienced?
 

Fluffywolf

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Do INTPs enjoy some of their thoughts grounded down to reality and made into a particular things that can be experienced?

There will be positive initial shock, definately. But it will be followed by dissappointment. The case is closed, the interest is lost, exit stage right.
 

INTPness

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I don't know if this question is really suitable for this thread, but what the heck; I'll ask it anyway and you can all burn me at the stake later if you feel like it. So, the question is: if you had romantic feelings towards someone you'd been friends with for years, but lived far away from, and weren't sure if they felt the same way... what would you do about it?
(This question may or may not be related to circumstances in my own life. Shhh.)

:mellow:

If I really truly felt like "this could be the one for me" and "I would potentially like to be with/settle down with this person", then it has to come to a conclusion at some point. The love letters and stuff would last for a time (and that's all fun and interesting), but Ti/Si demands some sort of conclusion. Ti/Si asks, "OK, so now what? What's going to come out of this?" I've had a long distance friendship before that lasted many years - but I didn't see it quite like "that". Connection was fabulous and all, but for other reasons I knew it wouldn't work. So, I was content to leave it as a friendship. And it stayed that way. But, if I had felt otherwise, I would have said, "OK, so what's next? How shall we proceed? Cuz I'd like to see where this goes."

Also important here is if you all have met and interacted in person yet. If not, then there's still a lot of information to be acquired. He's not going to commit the rest of his days to you without having met you and interacted with you. He's just not going to make that decision with so little information. If, on the other hand, you've already met and were fond of each other in person, then he's got "full information". If he's content to never act on it (and remain at a distance) then he's probably very content being friends and just leaving it at that. If he can no longer be without you, then he would make it a point to be with you. Nervousness or not being sure of himself could possibly delay him getting together with you, but it wouldn't prevent it forever. In other words, if he goes like 1-year without wanting to get closer, maybe that's him figuring things out. But, if he goes more than that, I wouldn't continue holding out. Go date someone else and put your valuable time and energy into someone who is serious about "being with you".
 

INTPness

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Do INTPs enjoy some of their thoughts grounded down to reality and made into a particular things that can be experienced?

Sometimes yes, sometimes no.

No: Someone may ask me how I would fix a certain problem. So, I'll provide a solution (my thoughts). But, I don't necessarily want to be a part of implementing that solution. Sometimes it's up to that person to go ahead and "do the dirty work". In other words, don't expect me to tell you how to solve your problem and to actually solve your problem, especially if I wasn't involved beforehand. If I'm closely connected/involved with the problem in the first place, then yeah, let's roll up our sleeves and fix it. But, if I'm not involved in it at all, then I'll offer my thoughts but you're going to have to do the implementing.

Yes: I have creative ideas, things I work out in my head for the future, etc. It's fun to brainstorm, etc. And it's very easy for the INTP to spend his whole life dreaming and brainstorming and never seeing anything actually come out of it. The brainstorming is fun. The implementation of it is work. So, it's easy for us to never implement. But, at the end of the day, if nothing comes out of our ideas, what the heck is the point of brainstorming? Just for the sake of brainstorming? Even though we do that quite often, it seems strange to me. If we can't bring our thoughts into some sort of practical reality, then they are wasted thoughts.

So, yeah, sometimes we need that nudge from people - to show us how to start bringing our thoughts into reality. The first step would be for the other person to really understand our thoughts, our vision. Then help us nudge forward, asking questions along the way ("Is this how you envisioned it starting to look?"), etc. I'm sure most INTP's would appreciate that nudge and that help in making things more real and tangible, so that we can "see" our ideas turn into real results. The hard part is we don't want to be directed or told what to do. If someone is on the same page with me, I love to collaborate and work together. If not, it feels like friction and I'd rather be left alone with my own thoughts. Yes, we're a strange bunch.
 

Redbone

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From any long distance, INTP's have no problem being honest about their feelings. The issues arise when the subject of romance is near the INTP. I would be all over the subject('s digital life).

Very true.
 

Faine

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From any long distance, INTP's have no problem being honest about their feelings. The issues arise when the subject of romance is near the INTP. I would be all over the subject('s digital life).

Very true.

If I really truly felt like "this could be the one for me" and "I would potentially like to be with/settle down with this person", then it has to come to a conclusion at some point. The love letters and stuff would last for a time (and that's all fun and interesting), but Ti/Si demands some sort of conclusion. Ti/Si asks, "OK, so now what? What's going to come out of this?" I've had a long distance friendship before that lasted many years - but I didn't see it quite like "that". Connection was fabulous and all, but for other reasons I knew it wouldn't work. So, I was content to leave it as a friendship. And it stayed that way. But, if I had felt otherwise, I would have said, "OK, so what's next? How shall we proceed? Cuz I'd like to see where this goes."

Also important here is if you all have met and interacted in person yet. If not, then there's still a lot of information to be acquired. He's not going to commit the rest of his days to you without having met you and interacted with you. He's just not going to make that decision with so little information. If, on the other hand, you've already met and were fond of each other in person, then he's got "full information". If he's content to never act on it (and remain at a distance) then he's probably very content being friends and just leaving it at that. If he can no longer be without you, then he would make it a point to be with you. Nervousness or not being sure of himself could possibly delay him getting together with you, but it wouldn't prevent it forever. In other words, if he goes like 1-year without wanting to get closer, maybe that's him figuring things out. But, if he goes more than that, I wouldn't continue holding out. Go date someone else and put your valuable time and energy into someone who is serious about "being with you".

Thank you for the replies.

So in this purely hypothetical situation... :mellow: Okay fine, so I may have a tiny bit of interest in an INTP with whom I have been long distance friends with for four/five years now. And by tiny bit I mean a lot. And by a lot I mean I really, really care about him. And by I really, really care about him I mean oh-crap-I'm-being-very-NF-about-this. Anyway, at the moment we have never actually met in person but I've arranged for that to change in a few months time. Would you say that the fact he was enthusiastic about this was a good sign? We speak daily, have done for years. We write together regularly (freeform RP for those who know what it is). We game together. He's supported me through some difficult times and he's effectively described us as soul-mates (in a round-about, totally not soppy way that made me lol). We're always teasing each other and he's always being 'mean' to me. On the rare occasions we fall out things are resolved quickly. We just seem to click.

Obviously, I'm concerned that if he does not feel as I do that I might damage this amazing friendship. He showed interest years ago but backed off when I became involved with an INTJ. That didn't work out for various reasons, one of them being my feelings for this INTP (I am a bad person). It's been a year now since my break up and he and I seem closer than ever. My gut tells me that we might actually be on the same page, that perhaps he has feelings as I do, but is waiting to see how our meet-up goes. That's how I'm playing it for now, that I'll hang on and wait until we've met in person. It seems like the most sensible option. Would you agree with this, or do you think I should make my hopes for something more clearer before I go?

And with that last question I promise I won't threaten to derail this thread into discussions about an INFJ's hopeless love life any further. I recognise that asking for advice and opinion on this sort of thing when you don't know me or the INTP in question is kind of silly, but there you have it. I suppose I am just a tit.

As per the second question. I would likely waste my time on watching movies, masturbation, tv shows, anime's, masturbation, computer games, fantasy novels, masturbation and after all that, some more masturbation would suffice. Oh yes, a man can have dreams...

:laugh:

I get this feeling masturbation is a big thing for you. Call it a hunch.
My amazing people-reading skills. Right there.


More questions! Random questions!

1. What's your favourite kind of weather and why?
2. Do you have any pet-peeves when dealing with other people?
3. Would you consider yourself a nervous sort of person when it comes to dangers that aren't likely to happen?
4. What do you think of spirituality?
5. If given the chance to rule the world, would you take it?

Five questions for now. Five is a nice number.
 
Last edited:

INTPness

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Thank you for the replies.

So in this purely hypothetical situation... :mellow: Okay fine, so I may have a tiny bit of interest in an INTP with whom I have been long distance friends with for many years now. And by tiny bit I mean a lot. And by a lot I mean I really, really care about him. And by I really, really care about him I mean oh-crap-I'm-being-very-NF-about-this.

Haha. I hope this goes well for you guys. Hope you all have fun together.

Anyway, at the moment we have never actually met in person but I've arranged for that to change in a few months time. Would you say that the fact he was enthusiastic about this was a good sign?

I know we're strange, but yes, if he's enthusiastic - that's a good sign! Enthusiasm is good, right? :D

We speak daily, have done for years. We write together regularly (freeform RP for those who know what it is). We game together. He's supported me through some difficult times and he's effectively described us as soul-mates (in a round-about, totally not soppy way that made me lol). We're always teasing each other and he's always being 'mean' to me. On the rare occasions we fall out things are resolved quickly. We just seem to click.

That's all good news!

Obviously, I'm concerned that if he does not feel as I do that I might damage this amazing friendship. He showed interest years ago but backed off when I became involved with an INTJ. That didn't work out for various reasons, one of them being my feelings for this INTP (I am a bad person). It's been a year now since my break up and he and I seem closer than ever. My gut tells me that we might actually be on the same page, that perhaps he has feelings as I do, but is waiting to see how our meet-up goes. That's how I'm playing it for now, that I'll hang on and wait until we've met in person. It seems like the most sensible option. Would you agree with this, or do you think I should make my hopes for something more clearer before I go?

1. At this point, I'd say you guys have enough of a "background" that you should give him an "honest shot". What I mean is, don't date other people or anything like that until the meetup. Show him that you're excited to meet HIM. You're not interested in some other guy, you're interested in him. Make it known that you aren't applying pressure, but that you simply want to make it known that you would like to take a step forward with him. That you care a great deal about him and you would like to move to Step 2. "I really like you! What are your thoughts?" - type of statement.

2. Yes, wait for the meetup and just be yourself. Just be comfortable in your own skin - it will make him more comfortable as well. He'll be able to intuit if you're "putting on a face" and stuff like that or if you're not yourself. It's OK if you're nervous (he probably will be too), but just try to relax and be you. Authenticity! But, the meetup is important for him cuz it's "the missing piece of the puzzle". Remember, we're largely going to do what we believe is logical. Although the thought of meeting a long-distance friend and falling in love is a nice thought, logic says, "Wait a second here. Think about this for a minute. You haven't even interacted with the person in a real, live situation."

And with that last question I promise I won't threatened to derail this thread into discussions about an INFJ's hopeless love life any further. I recognise that asking for advice and opinion on this sort of thing when you don't know me or the INTP in question is kind of silly, but there you have it. I suppose I am just a tit.

Nah, not silly at all. Good questions. Like I said, hope it goes well for you.

1. What's your favourite kind of weather and why?

Weather that leaves me unencumbered and uninhibited. The more options I have (for activities), the better. So, 75 degrees, slight breeze, sun shining, no rain. If the weather is not ideal, that's OK, we're good at improvising and dealing with whatever comes up.

2. Do you have any pet-peeves when dealing with other people?

Closed-mindedness, ignorance, hard-headedness, OK to debate/argue so long as is done with a good spirit, situations in which I have to extrovert for long periods of time. 1-on-1 is much better, especially if I'm meeting you for the first time. The more people in on the conversation, the more I'm going to remain reserved. The more interesting the conversation gets, the more I'm going to open up.

3. Would you consider yourself a nervous sort of person when it comes to dangers that aren't likely to happen?

Nah. Live life as it comes. Every day I let life present itself to me however it sees fit, and then I react to those circumstances accordingly.

4. What do you think of spirituality?

One word: For me personally, yes!

5. If given the chance to rule the world, would you take it?

I'd like to try it for a day. But, in reality, no. It's a struggle to get my underwear on the right way in the morning (stinky side in), so running the world could be problematic. :D
 

Rasofy

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More questions! Random questions!

1. What's your favourite kind of weather and why?
Not hot enough for me to sweat and not cold enough for me to get lazier than normal. About 75°F, with seaside-like humidity is perfect.
2. Do you have any pet-peeves when dealing with other people?
I get annoyed when people come too high energy on me (it is ok to be happy but don't have to act like you've won the lottery everyday!) and when they make questions and don't expect me to say the truth.
3. Would you consider yourself a nervous sort of person when it comes to dangers that aren't likely to happen?
When I enter in planes I'm fully aware that it might crash into another plane, lose its turbines, etc. but I don't get nervous when I know the risk is low.I was curious enough to learn the aproximate probabilities.
4. What do you think of spirituality?
Bullshit! It's similar to the Matrix, in the sense that most people subconsciously decided they are better off not facing reality. Ignorance is happiness.
5. If given the chance to rule the world, would you take it?
That could be fun, I like to think I would make the world a better place to live for those that aren't in my blacklist. :devil:
But if the offer is irreversible, no way I'd take it.
 

Faine

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I know we're strange, but yes, if he's enthusiastic - that's a good sign! Enthusiasm is good, right? :D

Ahahaha! Rereading that, it does seem like a rather silly question. I suppose I was wondering if it was a good sign for romance or if he was just enthusiastic about getting to meet a friend. Obviously I expected you to read my mind. Also to read his. Your lack of psychic ability is most disappointing!

Edit: Due to the personal nature this all took, I've decided to remove my following comments. Thank you to everyone who was offering help though, especially INTPness with whom I will now keep rambling away to via PM. I'll likely pop back to this thread again with less gushy/personal questions later!

I'd like to try it for a day. But, in reality, no. It's a struggle to get my underwear on the right way in the morning (stinky side in), so running the world could be problematic. :D
That could be fun, I like to think I would make the world a better place to live for those that aren't in my blacklist. :devil:
But if the offer is irreversible, no way I'd take it.

:laugh:

A world run by INTPs would definitely be an interesting place.​
 
N

NPcomplete

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Dear INTPs,

How do you deal with situations in which you HAVE to be serious and you can't crack any jokes (constipated colleagues ahoy!) nor do any silly thing?

I feel that the place I'm in currently is sucking the life out of me and I'm super-tired at the end of the day and usually end up doing very impulsive things to spice up my life. I'm not sure this is a good thing (the crazy impulsive things although I enjoy that a lot).

So HOW?
 

INTPness

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Dear INTPs,

How do you deal with situations in which you HAVE to be serious and you can't crack any jokes (constipated colleagues ahoy!) nor do any silly thing?

I feel that the place I'm in currently is sucking the life out of me and I'm super-tired at the end of the day and usually end up doing very impulsive things to spice up my life. I'm not sure this is a good thing (the crazy impulsive things although I enjoy that a lot).

So HOW?

Ha ha, I'm currently in the same situation. It's very serious business, this work stuff, you know? No joking allowed. No, I think what I'm learning is that with the INTJ's I work with, I am seeing their Te side which seems very structured and serious, but from what they tell me (the INTJ's on this board), I should go ahead and unleash Ne a little bit more. Go ahead and crack jokes with them even though they seem super serious. Maybe I'll just get the reputation of being the funny guy.

But, yeah, there are situations where you have to be serious and it can feel suffocating if it's like all day, every day. Sometimes I get off and I just want to go do something crazy and irrational to let off some steam. I feel like I've been caged. But, I just find opportunities to crack a joke wherever I can.

I went to the dentist today and I had him and his assistant cracking up pretty good. He gave me a shot to numb me and said, "I'll be back in about 10 minutes to get started." I said something like, "OK, sounds good. I should still be here when you get back." Then the nurse said, "I like your shoes - those are neat looking." I said, "They're my new running shoes. Try not to get any blood on them." Just little off-handed comments like this throughout the day to people keeps things light and fresh for me. It breaks up the monotony and the uber-seriousness. And 50% of people are pretty responsive to it. If I would have just said to him, "OK, thanks, see you in 10 minutes." Then, that just gets boring and uneventful all day. I try to use Ne to play off people's comments. When they say something, I come back with something funny and hope that I can get a laugh or that they'll joke back. Sometimes you hit, sometimes you miss, but at least it keeps it fun.

Also: seek out other Ne-users (NP's) in your workplace. They are there. You just have to locate them.
 
N

NPcomplete

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Ha ha, I'm currently in the same situation. It's very serious business, this work stuff, you know? No joking allowed. No, I think what I'm learning is that with the INTJ's I work with, I am seeing their Te side which seems very structured and serious, but from what they tell me (the INTJ's on this board), I should go ahead and unleash Ne a little bit more. Go ahead and crack jokes with them even though they seem super serious. Maybe I'll just get the reputation of being the funny guy.

But, yeah, there are situations where you have to be serious and it can feel suffocating if it's like all day, every day. Sometimes I get off and I just want to go do something crazy and irrational to let off some steam. I feel like I've been caged. But, I just find opportunities to crack a joke wherever I can.

I went to the dentist today and I had him and his assistant cracking up pretty good. He gave me a shot to numb me and said, "I'll be back in about 10 minutes to get started." I said something like, "OK, sounds good. I should still be here when you get back." Then the nurse said, "I like your shoes - those are neat looking." I said, "They're my new running shoes. Try not to get any blood on them." Just little off-handed comments like this throughout the day to people keeps things light and fresh for me. It breaks up the monotony and the uber-seriousness. And 50% of people are pretty responsive to it. If I would have just said to him, "OK, thanks, see you in 10 minutes." Then, that just gets boring and uneventful all day. I try to use Ne to play off people's comments. When they say something, I come back with something funny and hope that I can get a laugh or that they'll joke back. Sometimes you hit, sometimes you miss, but at least it keeps it fun.

Also: seek out other Ne-users (NP's) in your workplace. They are there. You just have to locate them.

Hahaha I can see myself cracking those jokes too.

I tried to subtly feed them some fibre (probing them first) but those people merely look at me blankly when I Ne on them. Eg: on Friday I had so many rapture jokes but nooooooooo, couldn't use any of them on them. I don't know. This makes me feel ... oppressed?

I know some Ne-users in other labs (I'm still in school) but they are as busy as I am so I can only very occasionally meet them for lunch/dinner. So far I've been surviving on conversations via gchat but this is driving me mad.
 

Octarine

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How would an INTP go about designing an ideal city? What would be considered and how?
 

INTPness

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Hahaha I can see myself cracking those jokes too.

I tried to subtly feed them some fibre (probing them first) but those people merely look at me blankly when I Ne on them. Eg: on Friday I had so many rapture jokes but nooooooooo, couldn't use any of them on them. I don't know. This makes me feel ... oppressed?

I know some Ne-users in other labs (I'm still in school) but they are as busy as I am so I can only very occasionally meet them for lunch/dinner. So far I've been surviving on conversations via gchat but this is driving me mad.

I hear ya. Keep coming back to TypoC. They accept many forms of payment here, one of which is Ne.
 

INTPness

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How would an INTP go about designing an ideal city? What would be considered and how?

Oh gosh. Good question. So many things to consider. I'm giving you the very "quick" version. If it were reality, I'd take years to map it out and consider/analyze everything.

For me, I actually like when something is "presented to me" and then I can react according to what has been handed to me. So, if someone said, you have to build a city in northeast Arkansas. Then, I can go and research the topography, the weather, the wind, is it tornado country, earthquake country (how strong do we have to build the structures), what is everything we need to take into consideration, airports, location relative to other major transportation hubs, etc.

But, since I don't have a "real" location to think about here - I guess I'm just going to consider...well, everything. I'm analyzing from all angles. Should we build "up" (highly concentrated with high-rise apartment buildings), or should we build "out" (sprawling suburbs, etc.) Do we even have a choice based on the location? I'm probably starting (at least on paper) with the essentials that every city needs - and that's where my sketch would begin. In the heart of the city, when pencil first hits paper, I'm putting a police station, a fire department, a hospital, a government building (courthouse, etc.), a library, etc. I'm going to have a "downtown" commercial area - where shops and businesses can move in and where people can walk and talk. I'm putting in benches, nice looking landscape, etc. My residential streets will shoot off from this downtown area and they will be a system that "makes sense". I live in a city now where there is, for example, 8th Street and 8th Avenue. So, you can be on the corner of 8th and 8th, or 6th and 6th. That's stupid and I'd like to talk to whoever thought of that. Streets should be very easy to navigate and understand for newcomers, visitors, and tourists. Like, I think in San Diego, the downtown area has lettered streets running one way (A, B, C, D Streets) and numbers running the other way. Simple, basic, and maybe uncreative, but it works. It's very easy to understand.

I'm putting an airport on the outskirts of the city. I'm putting a K-12 school somewhere - I'd have to research why it's better to put it on one edge of the city (keep traffic out of the center of the city?), or if it's better to put it downtown, etc. I'm putting a nice park here and there. I want it to look nice and pleasant. But, more than that, I want it to work well for the people that go there. I want it to function properly. I don't want even one single thing where people can go, "What in the world were they thinking when they constructed this city?" Nothing will be thrown in at the last minute, or done haphazardly. It will all be well thought-out on paper first, consulting with experts in various fields and in city planning to make sure that everything has either (a) worked well in another city in the past, or (b) will work well this time, in this city.

And I want something about the city to stand out. There has to be at least one thing that is unique or different about this city. Maybe a really good zoo in a small city (which is rare) - which would cause incoming traffic, but would also spur tourism and growth. A great water park/amusement park. A world renown rehabilitation center for women recovering from too many corns on their feet, or - something like that. Something that establishes the city as "the very best" in this particular area.

There's so many other things to consider too: location will largely dictate industry and types of jobs, etc, etc, etc. It goes on and on and on. A Ti dream, really. So much to analyze and map out. It has to come together spacially as well, on paper.

1. Function (easy to get around, things "make sense" to the newcomer and to the residents, people have everything they need, including peace, stability, safety, infrastructure, etc.)
2. Aesthetics (looks fresh and appealing - a place you'd want to come back to or even stay)
3. Everything else will fall into place once those things are established
 

Octarine

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Shouldn't the first thing to consider, be the people who are likely to live there in the first place and their lifestyles? You can't necessarily assume that current western lifestyles are 'ideal' either..
 

INTPness

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Shouldn't the first thing to consider, would be the people who are likely to live there in the first place and their lifestyles? You can't necessarily assume that current western lifestyles are 'ideal' either..

Well, sure, the people should definitely be considered as a foundational piece of the puzzle. That's why I mentioned that I want it to work and function for the people. That proper function will vary depending on who those people are. If you're saying it might be a city for "only old people" - well, I don't know many cities like that. I suppose I assumed a population that was reflective of the overall population. And, I don't make any assumptions that cities here in the U.S. are "better" or "worse" than other parts of the world. That's not for me to decide or to pass judgment on. I can have an opinion on things like that, but that doesn't mean my opinion is correct. I guess that's why I said I like something to be "presented to me" (an actual location and the specifics involved - who will live there, what is the weather like, etc, etc, etc.). Once those parameters and variables are "given", only then can I begin to speculate on what would be best for that specific city, in that specific location, with that specific population. If I'm given all that information up front, then absolutely, I'm going to design the city with all of those things in mind.

But, if those variables are not given and I'm only asked "how would you design an ideal city", then that's very broad, and I have to then begin with very basic things - every city needs a, b, c, etc. If you have something specific in mind (e.g., an Eastern city with a population of 8 million in a relatively small area, large elderly population, etc), then I can begin working off of that information.
 
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