User Tag List

12 Last

Results 1 to 10 of 16

  1. #1
    psicobolche tcda's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2009
    MBTI
    intp
    Enneagram
    5
    Posts
    1,292

    Default How to deal with anti-rational, opinionated snobs?

    So how do you deal with people who you have to get along with for practical reasons, but who are:
    • irrational (my family first and fuck the rest - somebody think of my children!);
    • ignorant, judgemental and opinionated to the point of absurdity ("I think feeding kids McDonalds is a form of child abuse"; "OMG your dad hasn't taught you how to drive!? That's a vital life skill! I consider that a form of child abuse!"; "You realize those chickens are fed in horriffic conditions, then frozen and flown over from China!"),
    • and horriffically snobbish ("OMG don't live in that area it's full of wierdos and criminals!"; or the fact that her little expensively educated brats rap to each other "you're ugly, you're a loser, your mum works at Macdonalds" )...


    so yeh, we're talking about a new addition to my family via probable future marriage (not to me, haha)....so how do I avoid strangling this enfuriating bitch and her spoilt kids (who I don't blame as they are too young to really know what they're doing - they're just a product of their education)

    EDIT: her MBTI type is ESFJ. This not my attempt to stereotype this type, as I know many who I like - it's just a fact.
    "Of course we spent our money in the good times. That's what you're supposed to do in good times! You can't save money in the good times. Then they wouldn't be good times, they'd be 'preparation for the bad times' times."

    "Every country in the world owes money. Everyone. So heere's what I dont get: who do they all owe it to, and why don't we just kill the bastard and relax?"

    -Tommy Tiernan, Irish comedian.

  2. #2
    Don't Judge Me! Haphazard's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2008
    MBTI
    ENFJ
    Posts
    6,707

    Default

    Actually, those chickens probably weren't flown over from China. China is complaining about cheap and probably unsafe chicken products imported from the United States.
    -Carefully taking sips from the Fire Hose of Knowledge

  3. #3
    psicobolche tcda's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2009
    MBTI
    intp
    Enneagram
    5
    Posts
    1,292

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Haphazard View Post
    Actually, those chickens probably weren't flown over from China. China is complaining about cheap and probably unsafe chicken products imported from the United States.
    I wish I'd known when she said it...*makes a note*

    I did however tell her, very politely, that I think that the mass production and transportation of food is a good thing.
    "Of course we spent our money in the good times. That's what you're supposed to do in good times! You can't save money in the good times. Then they wouldn't be good times, they'd be 'preparation for the bad times' times."

    "Every country in the world owes money. Everyone. So heere's what I dont get: who do they all owe it to, and why don't we just kill the bastard and relax?"

    -Tommy Tiernan, Irish comedian.

  4. #4
    Geolectric teslashock's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2009
    MBTI
    ENTP
    Enneagram
    7w6
    Posts
    1,690

    Default

    Just avoid interaction with them entirely, and when that's not possible, nod along politely.

    I've never really had much success questioning people like that for their views. It'd be nice if you could have them contemplate the root of their own value systems, but most just don't care to do that. That's a huge part of the problem.

  5. #5
    Senior Member Shimmy's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2009
    MBTI
    SEXY
    Posts
    1,868

    Default

    Yeah, there's no point arguing with, or pushing your opinion on, an SJ. If I were you I'd just tell them straight that you're not interested in their opinion every time they say something you disagree with. Don't get annoyed or angry, just explain to them that you don't feel like arguing. If they give you shit for speaking your opinion, then just tell them you don't like talking to them this way and therefore will not do it to preserve the friendship/peace between the two of you.
    (removed)

  6. #6
    Ghost Monkey Soul Vizconde's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2009
    MBTI
    INTP
    Enneagram
    5w4
    Socionics
    ILE
    Posts
    4,474

    Default

    Make them eat cat pooh.
    I redact everything I have written or will write on this forum prior to, subsequent with and or after the fact of its writing. For entertainment purposes only and not to be taken seriously nor literally.

    Quote Originally Posted by Edgar View Post
    Spamtar - a strange combination of boorish drunkeness and erudite discussions, or what I call "an Irish academic"

  7. #7
    darkened dreams labyrinthine's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2007
    MBTI
    isfp
    Enneagram
    4w5 sp/sx
    Posts
    8,595

    Default

    There isn't much point debating, since it would only escalate more of the same. If it is too frustrating to hear her opinions, minimize contact.

    When there are tensions in family interactions, non-aggression based humor can help refocus everyone if it is possible to find a shared sense of humor. If you have any say over it, suggest watching a comedy movie together or something that discourages conversation when there are family get-togethers.
    Step into my metaphysical room of mirrors.
    Fear of reality creates myopic morality
    So I guess it means there is trouble until the robins come
    (from Blue Velvet)

  8. #8
    Senior Member Valuable_Money's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2009
    MBTI
    ENTP
    Enneagram
    5w6
    Posts
    681

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by tcda View Post
    So how do you deal with people who you have to get along with for practical reasons, but who are:
    • irrational (my family first and fuck the rest - somebody think of my children!);
    • ignorant, judgemental and opinionated to the point of absurdity ("I think feeding kids McDonalds is a form of child abuse"; "OMG your dad hasn't taught you how to drive!? That's a vital life skill! I consider that a form of child abuse!"; "You realize those chickens are fed in horriffic conditions, then frozen and flown over from China!"),
    • and horriffically snobbish ("OMG don't live in that area it's full of wierdos and criminals!"; or the fact that her little expensively educated brats rap to each other "you're ugly, you're a loser, your mum works at Macdonalds" )...


    so yeh, we're talking about a new addition to my family via probable future marriage (not to me, haha)....so how do I avoid strangling this enfuriating bitch and her spoilt kids (who I don't blame as they are too young to really know what they're doing - they're just a product of their education)

    EDIT: her MBTI type is ESFJ. This not my attempt to stereotype this type, as I know many who I like - it's just a fact.
    The heavey use of the nonword OMG infuriates me.
    Ph'nglui mglw'nafh Cthulhu R'lyeh? wgah'nagl fhtagn

  9. #9
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Mar 2009
    MBTI
    INFP
    Posts
    669

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by teslashock View Post
    Just avoid interaction with them entirely, and when that's not possible, nod along politely.

    I've never really had much success questioning people like that for their views. It'd be nice if you could have them contemplate the root of their own value systems, but most just don't care to do that. That's a huge part of the problem.
    +1.

    I used to try to rationalize or argue with people like the one you mentioned, but it only made me frustrated. If they're not interested in listening, but only shoving opinions onto everyone else, it's useless to debate, and the best thing you can do is shut up and try to tune them out. They'll probably just assume you agree, anyway.
    I-71%, N-80%, F-74%, P-96%

  10. #10
    Head Pigeon Mad Hatter's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2009
    MBTI
    INTP
    Enneagram
    -1w sp/sx
    Socionics
    IOU Ni
    Posts
    1,028

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by teslashock View Post
    Just avoid interaction with them entirely, and when that's not possible, nod along politely.

    I've never really had much success questioning people like that for their views. It'd be nice if you could have them contemplate the root of their own value systems, but most just don't care to do that. That's a huge part of the problem.
    That's what I would do, too. I've known such people for quite a long time (I don't know their type though), and avoiding each other is probably the best you can do, for each of you.

    The underlined part is really a problem because I can almost always bring myself to at least some degree of understanding when I know the reasoning behind a certain opinion, even if I don't agree with it.

    If you consider them irrational, don't expect a rational explanation, and don't try to tackle it that way :/ Maybe this book can help (looks really interesting) - provided they even give you a chance to argue your own points, which could be a problem.

    Btw, having such parents/relatives is child abuse.
    IN SERIO FATVITAS.

    -τὸ γὰρ γράμμα ἀποκτέννει, τὸ δὲ πνεῦμα ζῳοποιεῖ-

Similar Threads

  1. [MBTItm] How to deal with ESFJs
    By elizamay in forum The NT Rationale (ENTP, INTP, ENTJ, INTJ)
    Replies: 13
    Last Post: 11-19-2009, 10:43 AM
  2. [MBTItm] How to deal with thinkers emotional blocked-ness?
    By JuneBugGemini in forum The NF Idyllic (ENFP, INFP, ENFJ, INFJ)
    Replies: 121
    Last Post: 05-05-2009, 08:16 PM

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
Single Sign On provided by vBSSO