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  1. #71
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    Quote Originally Posted by FDG View Post
    Nope, it would just be easier, holistically, if you were to modify your interaction style towards less abrasivness. Don't be so self-centered, your posts will always result in a lot of controversy with little real discussion as long as you don't modify such "take it or leave it" type of attitude. I can understand that you're stressed by the amount of things you need to handle in your everyday life, but we're on an internet forum, we're not necessarily close friends with each other, thus we cannot always take into account why others might be acting in a certain way.
    There was nothing wrong or out of the ordinary in the style presented by the OP. What made the thread devolve was people's past perceptions of the poster, a generally negative perception. Many of us also do not believe the poster to be the type she says she is, so when she speaks on that issue some will immediately discard what she says for feeling it lacks any credibility or true insight, and thusly, a devolving discussion is born.

    The merits of the OP cease to be important, and the overall perception of the poster, based upon previous experiences, is what becomes prime. Then when the trolling starts as a retort to the poster and the false image they are presenting (in the minds of the trollers), others are swayed by the theatrics and the overall appraisal of the situation is distorted by the mess they see. They see chaos, and immediately make mental shortcuts and attribution errors that tell them the poster must be at fault for the debauchery, when in fact, the words spoken have little inflammatory power in their own right. It is all the other context and background info about the poster, put together in the minds of every individual reader as their own perception.

    Case in point, those who do not know the poster never find anything to yell or scream about, because they don't possess all the built up prejudice that the familiars have. It is little to do with communication style, everything to do with people's perceptions of the poster (less what the poster is saying).

    My objective view.

  2. #72
    Administrator highlander's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by ThatGirl View Post
    Utilizing your strengths and we will prepare for your weakness, by maybe asking you to do two times your weakness vs one of your strength.
    One additional suggestion. IMHO, you get the best out of people by leveraging their strengths, not by focusing on their weaknesses.

    Everyone has weaknesses. What to do about them? You can get a little better. You can work with someone who has strengths in those areas to compliment you. Or, you can stop doing them. You can't make people into something they are not and especially can't expect them to think like you or be more like you. I know one very gifted ENTJ that expects just that and it is his biggest weakness as a leader. He also does not have tolerance for others who have different ideas or opinions than his, which I think is limiting as well.

  3. #73
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    Quote Originally Posted by highlander29 View Post
    One additional suggestion. IMHO, you get the best out of people by leveraging their strengths, not by focusing on their weaknesses.

    Everyone has weaknesses. What to do about them? You can get a little better. You can work with someone who has strengths in those areas to compliment you. Or, you can stop doing them. You can't make people into something they are not and especially can't expect them to think like you or be more like you. I know one very gifted ENTJ that expects just that and it is his biggest weakness as a leader. He also does not have tolerance for others who have different ideas or opinions than his, which I think is limiting as well.
    In my opinion utilizing or focusing too much on someones strengths only, while immediately beneficial, leaves huge holes for the future. This particular statement was made in regards to work type situations, even some friendships where people seek me out for advice.

    My idea of long term practical solution is this. Your strength will always be there, they are inherited strengths. Too many people rely solely on these throughout life. If you really want to improve, do not ignore your strengths, but work twice as hard on your weakness. Once your weakness is no longer an area of liability, work on your strengths uninhibited, and grow like a mother fucker.

  4. #74
    filling some space UnitOfPopulation's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by onemoretime View Post
    Nope. You expressed having taken true offense to the situation, rather than simply frustration or irritation. You also were motivated enough to post a wall of text, rather than dismiss the others outright. Fairly ENFPish reaction to negative stimulus.
    This, sir, is garbage.
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]

  5. #75
    Administrator highlander's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by ThatGirl View Post
    In my opinion utilizing or focusing too much on someones strengths only, while immediately beneficial, leaves huge holes for the future. This particular statement was made in regards to work type situations, even some friendships where people seek me out for advice.

    My idea of long term practical solution is this. Your strength will always be there, they are inherited strengths. Too many people rely solely on these throughout life. If you really want to improve, do not ignore your strengths, but work twice as hard on your weakness. Once your weakness is no longer an area of liability, work on your strengths uninhibited, and grow like a mother fucker.
    Well, agree that there are weaknesses that can result in your undoing and that working on both is worthwhile. However, there is the question of the return on investment for your efforts. What I have found is that it is very difficult to get really good at things you don't have natural talents in. From a personal standpoint, as much as it annoys me to no end, the things I'm not good at now are the things that I wasn't good at 20 years ago. It is not for lack of trying. You find ways to compensate, get a bit better, etc.

    I think understanding the unique contributions people bring, appreciating them for their uniqueness, and supporting them to develop their natural talents into real strengths is simply a more effective strategy. If you then leverage those talents in combination and facilitate teaming amongst those who have complimentary strengths, that is what leads to the "wow - how did you do that" kind of performance.

  6. #76
    Dreaming the life onemoretime's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Santtu View Post
    This, sir, is garbage.
    Now THAT's an ENTJ response.

  7. #77
    filling some space UnitOfPopulation's Avatar
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    Even ENTJ can't treat everything as something they didn't care about.
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]

  8. #78
    `~~Philosoflying~~` SillySapienne's Avatar
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    This is kind of an irrelevant post but...

    I only think there are, like, three or four real ENTJs who frequent this forum.

    Other trends I have seen.

    Males switching their Is to Es.

    Male Fs "becoming" Ts

    And some wimmens switching their Es to Is.

    Also, many INTPs tend to go xNTP, or IxTP, too... eventually.

    -----------------------------------------------------------------

    What is relevant is this.

    Fuck MBTI if you do not *sincerely* relate to a type.

    I'm tired of seeing people trying to disingenuously portray MBTI roles.

    Know who you are, and keep it fuckin' real, man!!!

    How are you gonna learn and grow at all as a person if a.) you're not true to yourself, b.) you're not honest with others, and c.) you're not willing to listen to, and digest, constructive/productive feedback.

    -SS
    `
    'Cause you can't handle me...

    "A lie is a lie even if everyone believes it. The truth is the truth even if nobody believes it." - David Stevens

    "That that is, is. That that is not, is not. Is that it? It is."

    Veritatem dies aperit

    Ride si sapis

    Intelligentle sparkles

  9. #79
    filling some space UnitOfPopulation's Avatar
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    Gotta agree with that (irrelevant as it is) - who in their right mind would want to play a type for kicks?

    Still, I think just perhaps 30-50% of people look much like any one type (more irrelevancy here).
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]

  10. #80
    Administrator highlander's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by SillySapienne View Post
    This is kind of an irrelevant post but...

    I only think there are, like, three or four real ENTJs who frequent this forum.

    Other trends I have seen.

    Males switching their Is to Es.

    Male Fs "becoming" Ts

    And some wimmens switching their Es to Is.

    Also, many INTPs tend to go xNTP, or IxTP, too... eventually.

    -----------------------------------------------------------------

    What is relevant is this.

    Fuck MBTI if you do not *sincerely* relate to a type.

    I'm tired of seeing people trying to disingenuously portray MBTI roles.

    Know who you are, and keep it fuckin' real, man!!!

    How are you gonna learn and grow at all as a person if a.) you're not true to yourself, b.) you're not honest with others, and c.) you're not willing to listen to, and digest, constructive/productive feedback.

    -SS
    Very interesting observations and good points. Why anyone would masquerade? I have no idea what practical purpose this would serve. Maybe they don't know? Maybe they don't like their type and would rather be something else? It took me six months to figure it out when I first started getting into this stuff, so I empathize with those who aren't sure.

    For those who aren't sure and see this post, consider taking a Step II MBTI at the following site: discoveryourpersonality.com. It may be one useful data point.

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