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  1. #1
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    Default NTs, how did you distance yourself from emotion?

    Fe has caused me more trouble that its worth and i can rarely access Fi when I need it (i.e. music composition or other creative outlets). instead Fi appears in forms of anger and depression at the least convenient times (as if there is ever a convenient time to be angry or depressed).

    NTs, specifically INTJs, how do you (or did you) distance yourself from your feelings? I've read that INTJs distance themselves from their emotions at a young age. NTs, is there a ritual that one must perform in order to achieve this state of mind?

  2. #2
    Riva
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    My INTJ best friend once said when I told him that I am learning to distance myself from my emotions (negative) by witnessing them without reacting to them he said he used to do it since he was a kid.

  3. #3
    Senior Member milkyway2's Avatar
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    I don't know how I did it. I just always remember feeling like my emotions and my mind were separate.

    It is like.. first I think something... and then that makes me cry or get angry or whatever. So if I can not think that thought, I won't feel the emotion...

  4. #4
    Riva
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    It's not that hard actually.
    The issue is learning how to do it. Once you reach a certain level of self observation you will begin to realize that you can actually see your thoughts at the initial level.

    meaning, you can see your thoughts before you become attached to them. Usually what happens is-

    Some external event stimulates our senses (the 5 senses)
    A thought arises
    We get attached to that thought
    We begin to think it's the reality (we begin to assume the worst)
    An emotion emerges
    We get attached to that emotion

    And if the thought was an angry though
    the emotion is an angry emotion.

  5. #5
    Senior Member JHBowden's Avatar
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    how do you (or did you) distance yourself from your feelings?
    I'm not sure what this even means. In English, it sounds like you want advice on how to deal with anger and unhappiness.

    If you're unhappy, then you probably need to acknowledge your feelings, so you can do what makes you happy. And if someone makes you angry, kill them.


  6. #6
    Riva
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    Quote Originally Posted by milkyway2 View Post
    I don't know how I did it. I just always remember feeling like my emotions and my mind were separate.
    Actually this is what I was trying to say.

    This would be especially easy for any type who are introspective enough. (it is not type related).

    Once you slowly start to witness your emotions without putting more fuel in to the fire, you begin to see your emotions as a separate entity (thing) from your mind.

  7. #7
    Writing... Tamske's Avatar
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    I've never consciously decided to become a T or something.

    About Fe.
    In my teens, I've tried desperately to belong to the group. I've adapted myself more than I wanted and to no effect - people still bullied me. So I've decided (consciously indeed) to not adapt to group norms any more and see who still liked me.
    Probably I've gone too far that way and scared off some people. Now I feel easier and not so self-conscious. I've embraced Fe again.
    Got questions? Ask an ENTP!
    I'm female. I just can't draw women

  8. #8
    Senior Member INTP's Avatar
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    rationalize
    "Where wisdom reigns, there is no conflict between thinking and feeling."
    — C.G. Jung

    Read

  9. #9
    Senior Member the state i am in's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Curzon View Post
    It's not that hard actually.
    The issue is learning how to do it. Once you reach a certain level of self observation you will begin to realize that you can actually see your thoughts at the initial level.

    meaning, you can see your thoughts before you become attached to them. Usually what happens is-

    Some external event stimulates our senses (the 5 senses)
    A thought arises
    We get attached to that thought
    We begin to think it's the reality (we begin to assume the worst)
    An emotion emerges
    We get attached to that emotion

    And if the thought was an angry though
    the emotion is an angry emotion.
    i just had this flashback to this time when i was lying in a pathouli scented sweatpool in corpse pose next to a blubbery whale of a woman with hairy armpits.



    also, the simple and short answer is to use different functions. T types develop different function balances, so they detach easier. if you are not that, some sort of mindfulness practice as mentioned above is the best bet. as an e5 myself, i naturally detach from emotional experiences and rationalize, which accounted for a stunted Fe growth that had to undergo a few reboots before it started up again. instead of trying to be more T, i'd try to use T to logically attack the F problem directly, not to avoid and detach from it, but to learn out how to better use it. emotional intelligence, maybe, if you can stomach being seen in the self-help section.

  10. #10
    desert pelican Owl's Avatar
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    I wouldn't suggest you try to distance yourself from your emotions; I'd counsel you to work to understand your emotions. Ask yourself questions such as, "what are anger and depression, what causes them, and what is their end?"

    There is such a thing as righteous anger, and depression causes the mind to intensely focus on the problem before it. Depression may hurt, but it can compel its victim to new heights of creativity and problem solving.

    Emotions and essential to human existence; if anything, you should be trying to integrate your emotions with your mind.

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