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Thread: INTJ and ENTJ

  1. #11
    Senior Member Jaguar's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by jenocyde View Post

    It's not that she acted emotionally to what was actually said, but to the fact that she felt betrayed by a disloyal friend (you).
    Betrayal: Swing the axe.

  2. #12
    psicobolche tcda's Avatar
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    wow this sounds a lot like my experience with an ENTJ woman. I'm still ignoring her.

    I'm no expert but I would speculate that "forgiveness" is not so much what you need from an ENTJ who cuts you out, as to regain respect. Maybe what she percieved was weakness on your part more than that you wronged her...
    "Of course we spent our money in the good times. That's what you're supposed to do in good times! You can't save money in the good times. Then they wouldn't be good times, they'd be 'preparation for the bad times' times."

    "Every country in the world owes money. Everyone. So heere's what I dont get: who do they all owe it to, and why don't we just kill the bastard and relax?"

    -Tommy Tiernan, Irish comedian.

  3. #13
    half mystic, half skeksis jenocyde's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Jaguar View Post
    Betrayal: Swing the axe.
    Absolutely!

    Quote Originally Posted by tcda View Post
    Maybe what she percieved was weakness on your part more than that you wronged her...
    I think it's one and the same for an ENTJ. All those things that I mentioned, if she perceives it to be that way, shows a weakness of character that she probably doesn't find appealing.

  4. #14
    psicobolche tcda's Avatar
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    ^^^hah, yeh.

    This thread actually helped a lot at explaining my own experience, it's kind of similair. In my case, some guy kept interrupting us and clowning around, her friend apparently, and anyway I guess he was being rude to her (though I couldn't make it all out as it was a club and I was kind of leaving them too it as they're firends, plus I may have laughed nervously at some point). But then I argued with him saying that he should talk to all 3 of us and not just in her ear and that he was being rude, which was the final straw, and she left.

    To be honest though I'm not going to apologise for that, I think if someone is that unforgiving they have their own problem, which I can't resolve. Best way to stop being the weak guy that chases after an ENTJ woman and only gets her contempt, is I guess to stop putting her on a pedestal in the first place. I've made sure every time she sees me, that she sees how well I'm doing, **** her.

    I don't know if that works on ENTJ women or not though. It started off as a strategy to "change my image" or some shit, but now it's just a case of me ignoring her on principle for being such a bitch, come what may. Though of course if there ever was another chance between us, I wouldn't think twice. :p

    Sorry to derail but I found our experiences similair enough that this may be of relveance here rather than starting my own thread (which'd have been kind fo a crap one).
    "Of course we spent our money in the good times. That's what you're supposed to do in good times! You can't save money in the good times. Then they wouldn't be good times, they'd be 'preparation for the bad times' times."

    "Every country in the world owes money. Everyone. So heere's what I dont get: who do they all owe it to, and why don't we just kill the bastard and relax?"

    -Tommy Tiernan, Irish comedian.

  5. #15
    half mystic, half skeksis jenocyde's Avatar
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    Ahhh, you INTPs...

    If she got that upset with you that she actually left, she must have really liked/respected you. Most people are barely on the radar for an ENTJ. I don't know why you put her on a pedestal, but it seems like she also put you on one, too. Then it seemed as if you were laughing at her while she was being teased by an asshole... how did you expect her to behave?

    Oh well, the drama between men and women has been there since the dawn of time - you think someone would have gotten it right by now. *sigh*

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    Quote Originally Posted by jenocyde View Post
    Just tell her you are sorry that you didn't take a bigger stand against the person who said that stuff about her. Tell her that you really care (or respect or whatever) her. Then just try to get back to normal. Next time she brings it up, just try and change the subject. Eventually she'll forget it and move on, but not if she is allowed to keep talking about it.
    I in fact asked her on how to block the person from FB so he would not even see our posts and that we were friends. For me the fact that I chose to tell her instead of keeping quiet is a reflection of my "loyalty" or rather preference for her. The male friend of mine is someone I knew far longer and the fact that I chose to tell her was because I felt he would probably gossip about me as I have my own family skeletons which I in fact shared with her in my explanation as to why I decided to tell her a few days later.

    If something like this happened to me I would have just told the person to F off. Instead she is not doing this and feels she would have preferred not to know about it. What's worse is she keeps badmouthing the person's sexuality etc. which is in my opinion irrelevant. For me I am not defending his behaviour but I cannot agree with her badmouthing of him as its illogical and emotional and irrelevant for me? Maybe she sees this as me defending him but that would be irrational?

  7. #17
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    Quote Originally Posted by jenocyde View Post
    Ahhh, you INTPs...

    If she got that upset with you that she actually left, she must have really liked/respected you. Most people are barely on the radar for an ENTJ. I don't know why you put her on a pedestal, but it seems like she also put you on one, too. Then it seemed as if you were laughing at her while she was being teased by an asshole... how did you expect her to behave?

    Oh well, the drama between men and women has been there since the dawn of time - you think someone would have gotten it right by now. *sigh*
    That's the crazy part for me. She clearly liked me and enjoyed chatting to me, always commenting on FB posts and calling me back if I called, even though I always say if I don't leave a message she needn't call back. So I guess I was on her radar. She had a great need to check whether I approved, now I think although she doesn't say it that I am to blame somehow. True in the sense that I picked up something fishy and specifically asked the guy about it.

    I honestly would prefer to know if someone was gossiping about me and yes she was concerned that mutual friends of his and hers would know.

    The issue is that her father had another wife and two kids who happen to be my "male friend's" cousins. This issue seems to embarrass her - as if its her issue. Now she says she doesn't care but fact she reacts to him the way she does is emotional.

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    Quote Originally Posted by tcda View Post
    ^^^hah, yeh.


    To be honest though I'm not going to apologise for that, I think if someone is that unforgiving they have their own problem, which I can't resolve. Best way to stop being the weak guy that chases after an ENTJ woman and only gets her contempt, is I guess to stop putting her on a pedestal in the first place. I've made sure every time she sees me, that she sees how well I'm doing, **** her.

    I don't know if that works on ENTJ women or not though. It started off as a strategy to "change my image" or some shit, but now it's just a case of me ignoring her on principle for being such a bitch, come what may. Though of course if there ever was another chance between us, I wouldn't think twice. :p

    .
    Know what u mean. I feel she owes me an apology for being such an emotional #%%. Ah well at least she sounded nice when I called after a whole (3 weeks) but could be the ENTJ "be nice" behaviour. Its just her emotional issues are irritating and actually left me totally bemused. I am an INTJ/P and I am not that emotional.

  9. #19
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    Quote Originally Posted by AdielK View Post
    He then proceeded to mention some personal issues about her life at which stage I stopped him and said I am tempted to ask more but felt as she was a good friend it was not appropriate for me to know such things. Reason being is that as he we was talking I thought shit what if u knew some of my issues - what would he say about me?
    Hello INTJ . Definitely a J.

    As for the girl, ENTJs do seem to have a strong emotional side. All the traits of Fi that seem to pop up with their Te to make judgments with.

  10. #20
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    Quote Originally Posted by Risen View Post
    Hello INTJ . Definitely a J.

    As for the girl, ENTJs do seem to have a strong emotional side. All the traits of Fi that seem to pop up with their Te to make judgments with.
    Funny because yes she acts very emotionally although she believes that she doesn't have a temper. In fact when I told her and she went all emo I told her she is being emotional.

    Oh well - one would think ENTJs are like INTJ's = able to be objective and avoid unnecessary emotion.

    Thought I was doing good when in fact it seems she either thinks
    a) I was selfish (true in sense I wanted to know more just not what he had to say) OR
    b) is embarrassed that I know this personal stuff which is embarrassing to her as suddenly she is not all powerful perfect person :-).

    I mean really she's not active on FB anymore and when I asked her she said oh she's busy. Please I am busy as well as I report directly on a lot of issues to the CEO and he's a tough guy.

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