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Thread: Ask an ENTP!

  1. #991
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    Quote Originally Posted by redcheerio View Post
    OK, thanks. I don't understand the description and I don't mind whether it's flattering or not (probably not ), but I can understand why @CzeCze might be reluctant to explain it further, haha.
    You're right, it may not be flattering, but that's what made it so funny. From the outside looking in, that's how she sees us [at work]. I had to laugh because my sister agreed with CzeCze. I often see the ENFJ and ENTJ like CzeCze described.

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    Quote Originally Posted by redcheerio View Post
    From the ENFJ thread, moved to here since my question is about ENTPs.
    Quote Originally Posted by redcheerio View Post
    OK, thanks. I don't understand the description and I don't mind whether it's flattering or not (probably not ), but I can understand why @CzeCze might be reluctant to explain it further, haha.
    Dood...I can't believe you just cut and paste my comments and threw me to the wolves!


    Quote Originally Posted by Nerd Girl View Post
    Pretty much her perception I think, but accurate IMO.
    Quote Originally Posted by Nerd Girl View Post
    You're right, it may not be flattering, but that's what made it so funny. From the outside looking in, that's how she sees us [at work]. I had to laugh because my sister agreed with CzeCze. I often see the ENFJ and ENTJ like CzeCze described.
    Ah-a! Validation!

    Is true, right??

    Do you mean that ENTPs always seem like that to you at work, or are you just comparing the diff ways that diff types show their claws?
    That's how folks I've worked with have come off.

    I'm asking cuz I really want to know. I'd like to get a better understanding of how I come across in the workplace to those I clash with. For me it's pretty rare to clash with people, but when I do, it seems like they want to murder me and I can't figure out what I did to enrage them so. Is one insensitivity slip (like arguing logic with someone who wants emotional validation) enough to bring out that kind of ferocity?
    Kekeke.

    Mmm, it sounds like you try to make nice with people at work. However, you might be unaware of how you're perceived, especially when you correct people on the spot (perhaps it seems 'snappish' or dismissive).

    Are you 'unstable' with your energy? Meaning are you jokey one minute and then snappy the next? Having worked with people who are kinda 'unstable' in their energy - fraternizing and jokey one second really terse the next - it can be difficult to vibe with. Especially if it's not always clear why someone's moods seem to be changing it's just jarring.

    Also, when you are joking as someone else pointed out, you might not be so good with the boundaries or whatnot so it still comes off pokey. Pokey + Snappish and you not being aware of their perception/reaction to you can make people seem to explode 'for no reason' at you when actually their irritation has been building.

    In answer to your italicized question, I'm not sure. And again, I'm gonna guess that when you perceive it was just 'one incident' there are other past incidents adding to the tension. Depending on what the issue is, 1 time can be enough.

    Also, when you feel you are being social, do you watch for reactions? I noticed in some ENTPs, and not just the young ones, aren't so good at gauging reactions. Like they'll say something which they think is funny but it comes off really abrasive and surprises the audience.

    Or perhaps you seem too glib about a project or topic that your coworkers think is important. Or maybe your attempts to be social/nice/jokey are backfiring. I remember one ENTP who is a property manager talking to a contractor, and I think she thinks of herself as personable and having "good people skills" (HA) but as I watched I just thought "OMG, you are a such a douche". Like one time I was a temp receptionist and the HR manager (EXFJ) beamed at me and exclaimed, "Good job! That's exactly how to put someone on hold!!" and I was horrified at how obviously patronizing she was, but perhaps she was genuinely trying to be nice and encouraging.

    Stuff like that ^^ if it's happening and/or the snap-snap-snap can build resentment in some people and they will seem to "want to murder you". I would just try to gauge better for reactions.
    “If you want to tell people the truth, make them laugh, otherwise they'll kill you.” ― Oscar Wilde

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  3. #993
    The Black Knight Domino's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Kasper View Post
    You can't.
    The inevitable answer.

    Unrelated: Wanna date my mini sim in Sim Social

    It's so on, it can't be off!


    Oh and eta: the more your avatar fights, the better it is for us. Pinch, slap, play dead, and he'll love it even more!
    Funny you should mention this. Without thinking, I insulted, mocked, derided, disarranged and generally made a huge nuisance of myself, and then realized after the fact that I had just sprayed gasoline on the fire. He came after me with his fingers snapping around his head, and I have no one to blame but myself. Oh the blame. The blame. *avaricious gleam*

    And on a somewhat side note - "pinch, slap, play dead, etc" sounded exactly like me and my ENTP ex. lol I knew it wasn't just him. You're all mutants! Mutants, I say!! <3

    Quote Originally Posted by Trollogo View Post
    So to clarify it wasn’t that he did it, but how he did it.
    Oh no, it was BOTH. HAHAHA! I should have known it would happen, but never expected it! <<<daft>>> The ballsy creep! lol And no I didn't mind.

    That is awesome, have you considered turning the tables on him? I say this basing it on an assumption that you picked a dainty attractive female avatar? You could make a new character that was bigger and have your way with him or level your character up? But how does it work, is it a level roll or strength roll (probably not as that would be slightly strange and creepy).
    If only I could do that! Curses! I would *love* to dude it up! haha! I can't change it though - I checked just to be sure because that sort of opportunity must not pass unchecked - and instead, I put my head together with my ENFP twin who has been enlisted into the scheming. She came up with some brilliant counter moves. Ne vs Ne, fighting fire with fire, because whenever *I* do something to him, it just makes him stronger/giddier/ballsier. *laughs*


    Oh I’m guessing he is the kind of guy that picks you up and swings you around whenever you meet up right?
    Ah, he refrains. *smiles* He's very self-contained in person. But this was the day-in, day-out with my ex. He'd find any excuse to grab me up or put his hands on me. We tussled a lot, verbally at first, then a lot verbally, then one day he broke the 4th wall of our comedy show and the next thing I know, we're wrestling around in the garage and I'm slapping his legs while he's holding me upside down. With one arm. *little tiger growling and grumbling* He had a lot of good-natured swagger, and anything I did to him as a well-placed counterstrike just seemed to turn him on. It was pretty hopeless. haha!

    Quote Originally Posted by Antimony View Post
    How is an ENTP supposed to pick one thing to do with their lives? How many ENTPs, or people for that matter, are successful juggling several indepth jobs, while managing free time? Must we compromise?
    May I ask - does the juggling result from taking on too much? If so, is the taking on based in the fear that no such opportunity may present itself again? Also, what do you define as compromise, and is it compromise a dirty word for you?
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  4. #994
    Senior Member redcheerio's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by CzeCze View Post
    Dood...I can't believe you just cut and paste my comments and threw me to the wolves!
    Haha, sorry, didn't mean to! <*hides fangs and claws*>




    Quote Originally Posted by CzeCze View Post
    Ah-a! Validation!

    That's how folks I've worked with have come off.
    OK, good to know. I didn't understand the first time, but it makes more sense after reading what you wrote below, thanks for clarifying!


    Quote Originally Posted by CzeCze View Post
    Kekeke.

    Mmm, it sounds like you try to make nice with people at work. However, you might be unaware of how you're perceived, especially when you correct people on the spot (perhaps it seems 'snappish' or dismissive).

    Are you 'unstable' with your energy? Meaning are you jokey one minute and then snappy the next? Having worked with people who are kinda 'unstable' in their energy - fraternizing and jokey one second really terse the next - it can be difficult to vibe with. Especially if it's not always clear why someone's moods seem to be changing it's just jarring.
    Hm, I'm not sure. It's true, I could be. I didn't think so, but I'll pay attention and watch for that.


    Quote Originally Posted by CzeCze View Post
    Also, when you are joking as someone else pointed out, you might not be so good with the boundaries or whatnot so it still comes off pokey. Pokey + Snappish and you not being aware of their perception/reaction to you can make people seem to explode 'for no reason' at you when actually their irritation has been building.
    Hmmm, that's true.


    Quote Originally Posted by CzeCze View Post
    In answer to your italicized question, I'm not sure. And again, I'm gonna guess that when you perceive it was just 'one incident' there are other past incidents adding to the tension. Depending on what the issue is, 1 time can be enough.

    Also, when you feel you are being social, do you watch for reactions? I noticed in some ENTPs, and not just the young ones, aren't so good at gauging reactions. Like they'll say something which they think is funny but it comes off really abrasive and surprises the audience.

    Or perhaps you seem too glib about a project or topic that your coworkers think is important. Or maybe your attempts to be social/nice/jokey are backfiring. I remember one ENTP who is a property manager talking to a contractor, and I think she thinks of herself as personable and having "good people skills" (HA) but as I watched I just thought "OMG, you are a such a douche". Like one time I was a temp receptionist and the HR manager (EXFJ) beamed at me and exclaimed, "Good job! That's exactly how to put someone on hold!!" and I was horrified at how obviously patronizing she was, but perhaps she was genuinely trying to be nice and encouraging.

    Stuff like that ^^ if it's happening and/or the snap-snap-snap can build resentment in some people and they will seem to "want to murder you". I would just try to gauge better for reactions.
    Hm, great points. Something to think about.

    Thanks!

  5. #995
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    Alright guys, which one of you pissed off the INFP?...

    Quote Originally Posted by CzeCze View Post
    Ah-a! Validation!

    Is true, right??

  6. #996
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    Quote Originally Posted by Domino View Post
    May I ask - does the juggling result from taking on too much? If so, is the taking on based in the fear that no such opportunity may present itself again? Also, what do you define as compromise, and is it compromise a dirty word for you?
    I think the juggling might be independent of taking on too much, but it could end up that it may be too much. Certainly, part of it is the fear that no such opportunity may come again.

    Compromise is giving up my total reality for something more realistic. All this is hypothetical- I still don't even really have that much of a plan worked out...because I want to do too much and it all sounds so appealing.

    And yes, generally compromise is a very dirty word to me.
    Excuse me, but does this smell like chloroform to you?

    Always reserve the right to become smarter at a future point in time, for only a fool limits themselves to all they knew in the past. -Alex

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    Quote Originally Posted by Domino View Post
    You're all mutants! Mutants, I say!! <3
    I loves it when you talk filthy!


    Quote Originally Posted by Antimony View Post
    How is an ENTP supposed to pick one thing to do with their lives?
    Why would they? I mean what is the advantage of picking one thing and sticking to it? Never achieving goals is an issue, but achieving them then moving on is success imo. Don't ignore forethought, but go with what you want to do now... if you can't pick that though, then it's a different question.

    Quote Originally Posted by Antimony View Post
    How many ENTPs, or people for that matter, are successful juggling several indepth jobs, while managing free time? Must we compromise?
    At the same time?

    How indepth can something be if you spread yourself thin? Decide if you want breadth or depth cause at a certain point something has to give.

    To work well life requires balance.

  8. #998
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    Quote Originally Posted by Kasper View Post
    Why would they? I mean what is the advantage of picking one thing and sticking to it? Never achieving goals is an issue, but achieving them then moving on is success imo. Don't ignore forethought, but go with what you want to do now... if you can't pick that though, then it's a different question.
    Hm, maybe I should give that a shot. Well, what I really want to do now is dance, combined with music. Or maybe just perform one day. But it seems a bit impractical, do focus hardcore on dance. And now that I am in college, I think I will do reasonably well. But there is the ever present issue of picking a degree...



    At the same time?

    How indepth can something be if you spread yourself thin? Decide if you want breadth or depth cause at a certain point something has to give.

    To work well life requires balance.
    That is very true. The issue is picking what I want to do in depth.
    Excuse me, but does this smell like chloroform to you?

    Always reserve the right to become smarter at a future point in time, for only a fool limits themselves to all they knew in the past. -Alex

  9. #999
    Senior Member Adasta's Avatar
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    Do you find it difficult to read people's intentions/moods/etc.? I find that you guys tend to carry on talking despite others giving (what I think are) clear signs that signal that particular topic of conversation is over.

    Why do you persist? Is it that you genuinely missing the signals and are then surprised when someone is irritated at you for talking too much? Or is it that you are vocalising a continuing train of thought and don't realise it? Or are you excited by the thought and therefore can't really help yourself?

    Also,

    Do you find Introverts a bit irritating? Are they frustratingly inscrutable to you?
    That girls are raped, that two boys knife a third,
    Were axioms to him, who'd never heard
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    Or one could weep because another wept.

  10. #1000
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    Quote Originally Posted by Antimony View Post
    Hm, maybe I should give that a shot. Well, what I really want to do now is dance, combined with music. Or maybe just perform one day. But it seems a bit impractical, do focus hardcore on dance. And now that I am in college, I think I will do reasonably well. But there is the ever present issue of picking a degree...
    College degrees don't matter. Unless you want to be a doctor or scientist and need the degree to get into a grad program. Even then you can still major in anything you want as long as you do that pre-professional chain of classes. Or you can do a post-bac after the fact. What will be more important is your job history which will depend on also on your internships and overall classes and GPA.

    My advice to you as someone who wished they had done what they wanted (Theater/Film/ som obscure language I don't use anymore) instead of what was practical - take classes based on what inspires you during the first 2 years. If you see a pattern showing, go with it for a major. If you want to major in dance then major in dance. You can get a double major or a minor to 'beef' it up if you want.

    I had a friend who double majored in Biochem and US History went straight for her PhD in Pharmacology was making bank as a science advisor then got her JD. While this was a very professional route the point here is that her US History degree didn't necessarily apply to anything. And she knew that. But, she just loved US History and wanted to study it so she double majored in it. I think she said she thought it also made her well-rounded compared to the eggheads she'd be competing against for grad school and fellowships. Also there was a musical theater kid who played 'Annie' as a child who double majored in theater (which she loved) and was pre-med (which she also liked but not as much as theater) and did make it into med school.

    Also with dance and music, honestly speaking this may be the one and only time in your life that you have this opportunity to study these subjects in depth, with academic rigor, in a relatively safe and stable environment.

    When I was your age I would have thought "wow, dance degree, impractical" but now I think "damn, what a great chance, do it!" Having a dance degree will not hurt you in "the real world" to land a job outside of that field unless your GPA sucked and you didn't take any other classes.
    Of course, you don't need a dance degree to be a dancer or choreographer, but we're not really talking practicality here, more what is appropriate for a major.

    I also like to study dance and music, but unless you are in a full time college there is no way to duplicate that 360 learning environment and rigor and accountability. I have taken music, dance, and language classes after undergrad but I sorely regret not taking more language classes. It is painful and expensive and often times kinda shoddy trying to learn these things outside that environment - unless you are really good at being self-taught. Again, that undergrad environment when you are a "traditional language age" is the best way to do it and build that foundation.

    Soooo, yeah, just do it. You don't have to worry about what's practical and sacrifice your interests etc. just yet.
    “If you want to tell people the truth, make them laugh, otherwise they'll kill you.” ― Oscar Wilde

    "I'm outtie 5000" ― Romulux

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