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  1. #51
    Senior Member Shimmy's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by shortnsweet View Post
    Normally I land on T for other reasons in the end. Though it always throws me for a loop and gives me an F vibe for a while. Sometimes I think its something about me in particular that brings this out in people, like i'm doing something different, but i'm not sure what.
    I think ESFPs spontaneity and warmth brings it up in us.

    Quote Originally Posted by shortnsweet View Post
    yea, that was TOTALLY manipulative. I actually called him on it when I saw him. He got a little embarrassed and then said. "Sorry... fishing for compliments.. " then we laughed about it.
    I'm speaking for myself here. I think INTPs can be very manipulative if we're in emotional conflict. We don't really want to however. I think it's a sign that things are not the way we want them to be and think of ways to achieve something.
    (removed)

  2. #52
    Senior Member King sns's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Unique View Post
    When did I say I only use Ne with "special people" ?

    Also I'm well aware of what Fe in an INTP is capable of but I'm looking at the scenario at hand am not seeing a cunning manipulative INTP but rather more of an INFP with insecurities, I doubt this guy is manipulative on purpose just going off the information at hand
    well, its like I said, I ruled out INFP for the overall personality. Normally he's cool, looks at all angles of things, critical, thoughtful, and objective more than warm and subjective. And the INTP description just fits him better. It was this thing that turned him into a feely mcfeelerpants monster. I think that what Jennifer was saying in the beginning of the thread makes a lot of sense to what's going through his head, based on everything that he's told me. I think changing the T to an F changes the entire personality- INFP's and INTP's are very different people. INFP just doesn't fit in the overall scheme of things.

  3. #53
    Senior Member King sns's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Risen View Post
    I disagree. It sounds like emotional immaturity played out through the use of the inferior Fe. Every INTP has a unique personality and some are better with using Fe than others. Certainly being able to use it on a manipulative level (paired with Ti to determine how it should be done to get a certain result) is not out of reach for an INTP. Manipulative insecurity and immaturity. And I disagree about only showing Ne to special people. I regularly use Ne as a means of being more extroverted with anyone.
    Yea, that seems accurate. Especially since his form of manipulation seems a bit silly to someone who understands more about feelings and people and stuff. Its like, he's using the Fe, using it with insecurity, and not using it very well, and probably not even realize he's doing it.

  4. #54
    man-made neptunesnet's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Jennifer View Post
    For example, you might just make assumptions about your bf because he is your bf, and you think your commitment is obvious -- in relationships people just assume the other person loves them, or thinks they're important to them, etc -- but INTPs by nature avoid assumptions, so sometimes they look for data to prove things to themselves that other people assume naturally. hence, they can seem more paranoid and demanding of unnecessary information in order to trust, if they start to have doubts.
    Maybe it's an INxP thing.
    I'm exactly the way you've described.

    Quote Originally Posted by MonkeyGrass View Post
    This is right on the money. Underdeveloped feeling can be almost embarrassingly sweet, especially when it shows up in a person who usually doesn't self express that way.
    Quote Originally Posted by groovejet02 View Post
    This resonates with how I am when in love. Yes, I tend to analyse and over-analyse the relationship. And sometimes I don't feel so loving. But at the end of the day, I ask myself what do I want out of the relationship, how can I be better, where it's heading. I outline my commitments, my plans and worries of potential pitfall of the relationship and communicate them with my SO. And then I commit and give my all to the relationship. This is where the famous INTP loyalty comes in.

    I suspect that INTPs who are fickle in relationships are the immature types.
    +1

    The only INTP I know is very loyal and responsible (he grew up in a house fun of Js). He appears cold and aloof at first, but once you talk to him and show him that you care he's the sweetest thing. Awkward especially in relationships but very sweet. He's a good friend of mine, and I'm so glad I know him.
    Yeah, the ones you're running into, shortnsweet, are probably immature.

  5. #55
    . Blank's Avatar
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    I don't feel as though I connect with the INTP the OP is talking about.

    Then again, I'm still stuck on the pizza thing.

    As in, I want some.
    Ti = 19 [][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][]
    Te = 16[][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][]
    Ne = 16[][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][]
    Fi = 15 [][][][][][][][][][][][][][][]
    Si = 12 [][][][][][][][][][][][]
    Ni = 12 [][][][][][][][][][][][]
    Se = 11[][][][][][][][][][][]
    Fe = 0

    -----------------
    Tiger got to hunt, bird got to fly;
    Man got to sit and wonder why, why, why;
    Tiger got to sleep, bird got to land;
    Man got to tell himself he understand

  6. #56
    Senior Member King sns's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Blank View Post
    I don't feel as though I connect with the INTP the OP is talking about.

    Then again, I'm still stuck on the pizza thing.

    As in, I want some.
    At least someone does

  7. #57
    Senior Member Misty_Mountain_Rose's Avatar
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    Ugh God. Ok, I read the first three pages and I can feel my ire creeping up, so before I read all of it and type a really horrid response about INTPs in general, let me say that if you read threads on this forum about INTPs and their behaviour in relationships, you'll find that you aren't the first who has had this problem. The problem seems nearly the same for everyone trying to handle a relationship with them:

    - Other person senses that the INTP cares for them, but the INTP won't admit it or commit to it

    - Other person tries to place boundaries, extract themselves from the relationship, only to have the INTP pull them back in by 'subtle nuances that they care'

    - Other person gets caught in an endless loop with the INTP, often lasting for years, where the phsychological 'games' that the INTP plays are making them borderline insane. No clarity is found, only a deadlock of Other Person declaring that they will wait because they just know that the INTP loves them but can't show it. They give X Million number of reasons WHY they know this, without ever having heard it from the INTP.

    - When pressed for closure, the INTP has a meltdown, Other Person feels that they were 'too pushy' and the process starts all over again.

    THIS is what it means for most people who fall for an INTP.

    Do yourself a favor and make up your own mind. There are only two options:

    1. YOU decide that the two of you will NEVER be anything more than friends, no matter what, and proceed accordingly. Stop reading into the 'subtle nuances' things that the INTP never vocalizes or you will torture yourself forever.

    2. Cut him from your life completely. In my own experiences, that is often difficult after having been 'such close friends' for so long. They have a way of becoming entangled in your every day life without it really being 'significant'. I wasn't strong enough to do it, though I tried a few times.

    So nearly Ten years after I met mine, I know that he is just a friend, and always will be just a friend. I now decide on the boundaries and don't react to his 'kindnesses' as anything more than concern from say, a big brother. Things have been a lot better since I made this move.

    Quote Originally Posted by shortnsweet View Post
    Nah, I've found the opposite to be true. INTP relationships: Long, bitter and helpless hopeless.
    ^^^ Fixed
    Embrace the possibilities.

  8. #58
    Senior Member King sns's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Misty_Mountain_Rose View Post
    Ugh God. Ok, I read the first three pages and I can feel my ire creeping up, so before I read all of it and type a really horrid response about INTPs in general, let me say that if you read threads on this forum about INTPs and their behaviour in relationships, you'll find that you aren't the first who has had this problem. The problem seems nearly the same for everyone trying to handle a relationship with them:

    - Other person senses that the INTP cares for them, but the INTP won't admit it or commit to it

    - Other person tries to place boundaries, extract themselves from the relationship, only to have the INTP pull them back in by 'subtle nuances that they care'

    - Other person gets caught in an endless loop with the INTP, often lasting for years, where the phsychological 'games' that the INTP plays are making them borderline insane. No clarity is found, only a deadlock of Other Person declaring that they will wait because they just know that the INTP loves them but can't show it. They give X Million number of reasons WHY they know this, without ever having heard it from the INTP.

    - When pressed for closure, the INTP has a meltdown, Other Person feels that they were 'too pushy' and the process starts all over again.

    THIS is what it means for most people who fall for an INTP.

    Do yourself a favor and make up your own mind. There are only two options:

    1. YOU decide that the two of you will NEVER be anything more than friends, no matter what, and proceed accordingly. Stop reading into the 'subtle nuances' things that the INTP never vocalizes or you will torture yourself forever.

    2. Cut him from your life completely. In my own experiences, that is often difficult after having been 'such close friends' for so long. They have a way of becoming entangled in your every day life without it really being 'significant'. I wasn't strong enough to do it, though I tried a few times.

    So nearly Ten years after I met mine, I know that he is just a friend, and always will be just a friend. I now decide on the boundaries and don't react to his 'kindnesses' as anything more than concern from say, a big brother. Things have been a lot better since I made this move.



    ^^^ Fixed
    Love it! Thank you.

  9. #59
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    Quote Originally Posted by shortnsweet View Post
    well, its like I said, I ruled out INFP for the overall personality. Normally he's cool, looks at all angles of things, critical, thoughtful, and objective more than warm and subjective. And the INTP description just fits him better. It was this thing that turned him into a feely mcfeelerpants monster. I think that what Jennifer was saying in the beginning of the thread makes a lot of sense to what's going through his head, based on everything that he's told me. I think changing the T to an F changes the entire personality- INFP's and INTP's are very different people. INFP just doesn't fit in the overall scheme of things.
    Fair enough then, just a hunch

    IDK about just ignoring the subtle things INTPs do btw often thats all we can do to show that we like someone cause we too introverted

    When someone asks me blunt about how I feel about them... I like that, thats how me an my last gf got together (though atmosphere is key here, 1 on 1, online etc)

  10. #60
    wholly charmed Spartacuss's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Blank View Post
    I don't feel as though I connect with the INTP the OP is talking about.
    ditto.
    infps can be critical, thoughtful + objective. Look around the board! I know one just like the one described: analytical and cool about other stuff and feeley monster about his relationships.
    intjs are known to crazy with the Fi.
    Ti (43); Ne (41.8); Te (33.7); Fi (30.5); Ni (27.5); Se (24.7); Si (21.5); Fe (17.3)
    The More You Know the Less You Need. - Aboriginal Saying

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