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  1. #41
    Senior Member King sns's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Risen View Post
    Ouch, that's even worse X_X.

    As far as clingyness goes and all the stuff you've mentioned, I've learned to consciously avoid going there as much as possible. Avoiding infatuation is the key. Nowadays I prefer things to be nice and balanced without the extreme high of infatuation that come tumbling down later on and really breed unhealthy relationships. And that's when you start coming across women who actually like that sort of behavior and are put off if you don't express it, so at the end of the day the INTP still loses :P .
    Haha.. Poor INTP..

    Well, I also like that. I like the honesty and the excitement and just the overall sweetness and all the attention, and the loyalty...

    Just not the whineyness so much and the looking too far into things.

    Like: This is a conversation via text message from last night..

    Me: Work is so boring and lame today
    Him: start a code black. At least you have office space to look forward too. (inside joke about calling codes at my job, also we planned on seeing office space last night)Me: Yep. I have a pizza to make too (Well I thought I was making things more fun for us..)
    Him: I like how you're more excited about food than hanging out. (Agh! I can never win! )

    This seems really common for INTP's.


    I don't know.. Spose I gotta take the good with the bad.

  2. #42
    darkened dreams labyrinthine's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by shortnsweet View Post
    I noticed once you start to become more emotionally involved, they are like emotional train wrecks all of a sudden. And i'm always thrown into the position of being the steady, reasonable one.

    Clingy, whiney, untrusting at times. Extremely affectionate. Almost feminine. I don't get it. I usually think at that point maybe I mistyped them.
    Those sound unfamiliar as INTP traits based on my own experiences. Some qualities associated with INTPs are the childlike, pure emotion which has been mentioned which could account for that possibly in your friends? There is also a tendency to get lost in thought and a lesser need for the external world in regards to both senses and emotions. There is also a penchant for problem solving. Any sort of conflict or problem is taken into an analytical place in an attempt to fix it and get it out of the way. If faced with problems that defy solving, I think escapism into the mind of some sort is a likely approach rather than clinging more strongly to anything external.

    There is a tendency to default type guys as Ts and women as Fs. In the end all the categories end up with some striking incoherency when applied to reality. I wouldn't want to guess at a type based on the information.
    Step into my metaphysical room of mirrors.
    Fear of reality creates myopic morality
    So I guess it means there is trouble until the robins come
    (from Blue Velvet)

  3. #43
    Senior Member cafe's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by shortnsweet View Post
    Haha.. Poor INTP..

    Well, I also like that. I like the honesty and the excitement and just the overall sweetness and all the attention, and the loyalty...

    Just not the whineyness so much and the looking too far into things.

    Like: This is a conversation via text message from last night..

    Me: Work is so boring and lame today
    Him: start a code black. At least you have office space to look forward too. (inside joke about calling codes at my job, also we planned on seeing office space last night)Me: Yep. I have a pizza to make too (Well I thought I was making things more fun for us..)
    Him: I like how you're more excited about food than hanging out. (Agh! I can never win! )


    I don't know.. Spose I gotta take the good with the bad.
    Okay, that is making my spidey senses whack out. You didn't say anything wrong at all and he, consciously or unconsciously, went looking for something to feel bad about and to use as a lever to pry reassurance from you via guilt. Very manipulative, which is not a good sign, I suspect it's especially bad in a type that generally values autonomy.

    My gut says - RUN.
    “There are two novels that can change a bookish fourteen-year old’s life: The Lord of the Rings and Atlas Shrugged. One is a childish fantasy that often engenders a lifelong obsession with its unbelievable heroes, leading to an emotionally stunted, socially crippled adulthood, unable to deal with the real world. The other, of course, involves orcs.”
    ~ John Rogers

  4. #44
    Senior Member King sns's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by toonia View Post
    Those sound unfamiliar as INTP traits based on my own experiences. Some qualities associated with INTPs are the childlike, pure emotion which has been mentioned which could account for that possibly in your friends? There is also a tendency to get lost in thought and a lesser need for the external world in regards to both senses and emotions. There is also a penchant for problem solving. Any sort of conflict or problem is taken into an analytical place in an attempt to fix it and get it out of the way. If faced with problems that defy solving, I think escapism into the mind of some sort is a likely approach rather than clinging more strongly to anything external.

    There is a tendency to default type guys as Ts and women as Fs. In the end all the categories end up with some striking incoherency when applied to reality. I wouldn't want to guess at a type based on the information.

    Normally I land on T for other reasons in the end. Though it always throws me for a loop and gives me an F vibe for a while. Sometimes I think its something about me in particular that brings this out in people, like i'm doing something different, but i'm not sure what.

  5. #45
    Senior Member King sns's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by cafe View Post
    Okay, that is making my spidey senses whack out. You didn't say anything wrong at all and he, consciously or unconsciously, went looking for something to feel bad about and to use as a lever to pry reassurance from you via guilt. Very manipulative, which is not a good sign, I suspect it's especially bad in a type that generally values autonomy.

    My gut says - RUN.
    yea, that was TOTALLY manipulative. I actually called him on it when I saw him. He got a little embarrassed and then said. "Sorry... fishing for compliments.. " then we laughed about it.

  6. #46
    Widdles in your cream.
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    It seems like he's been taught that using guilt trips is the only/main way to achieve affirmation. Can't say I never used manipulation; in another relationship, if I felt unloved I would incite jealousy in the partner by feigning interest in other people, in a casual manner. I wasn't above sulking, either. Sheesh. I could be petty.

    I say break the cycle by ending it, or "just don't look, just don't look!"; ignoring it. Once he learns that it no longer gives him his reward, he should calm down. Or dump you. Alternatively, find out what "love language" he speaks (Quality time, words of affirmation, etc). If he genuinely feels insecure and unloved, miscommunication could be the cause. I'd imagine it would be a fairly common problem with SFP/NTP relationships.
    Um, yeah.

  7. #47
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    Ouch I am a INT but borderline J/P so the description of INTP is dangerously close to home. Sounds very familiar. To be honest admired myself for being very straight and to the point ito my feelings. But insecurity issue, although I I didn't register it does sound familiar. Ouch need to watch it

    Thanks for insight.

  8. #48
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    Quote Originally Posted by shortnsweet View Post
    Haha.. Poor INTP..

    Well, I also like that. I like the honesty and the excitement and just the overall sweetness and all the attention, and the loyalty...

    Just not the whineyness so much and the looking too far into things.

    Like: This is a conversation via text message from last night..

    Me: Work is so boring and lame today
    Him: start a code black. At least you have office space to look forward too. (inside joke about calling codes at my job, also we planned on seeing office space last night)Me: Yep. I have a pizza to make too (Well I thought I was making things more fun for us..)
    Him: I like how you're more excited about food than hanging out. (Agh! I can never win! )

    This seems really common for INTP's.


    I don't know.. Spose I gotta take the good with the bad.
    Wow, really? From an INTP.... and common?

    Interesting, I mean he is definitely reading something into it that isn't there but IDK something smells of NF here

    Once an INTP lets you in they do show their cute emotions but they are still few and far between

    Oh and because some douche might say it, yes I have been an love and yes my emotions and Fe were still rarely shown, I obviously show Ne to those I love the most

    ESFPs tend to like this cause to them its like "wow how did you come up with that? " and sometimes "okay! lets do it" which is funny to the INTP because they never expected their idea to come into action in a fun way

    But yeah I just can't picture any NT exposing themselves in that way and being that manipulative with emotions especially in INTPs with their inferior Fe it wouldn't be developed enough to achieve such emotionally clever manipulation

  9. #49
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    Quote Originally Posted by Unique View Post
    But yeah I just can't picture any NT exposing themselves in that way and being that manipulative with emotions especially in INTPs with their inferior Fe it wouldn't be developed enough to achieve such emotionally clever manipulation
    I disagree. It sounds like emotional immaturity played out through the use of the inferior Fe. Every INTP has a unique personality and some are better with using Fe than others. Certainly being able to use it on a manipulative level (paired with Ti to determine how it should be done to get a certain result) is not out of reach for an INTP. Manipulative insecurity and immaturity. And I disagree about only showing Ne to special people. I regularly use Ne as a means of being more extroverted with anyone.

  10. #50
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    Quote Originally Posted by Risen View Post
    I disagree. It sounds like emotional immaturity played out through the use of the inferior Fe. Every INTP has a unique personality and some are better with using Fe than others. Certainly being able to use it on a manipulative level (paired with Ti to determine how it should be done to get a certain result) is not out of reach for an INTP. Manipulative insecurity and immaturity. And I disagree about only showing Ne to special people. I regularly use Ne as a means of being more extroverted with anyone.
    When did I say I only use Ne with "special people" ?

    Also I'm well aware of what Fe in an INTP is capable of but I'm looking at the scenario at hand am not seeing a cunning manipulative INTP but rather more of an INFP with insecurities, I doubt this guy is manipulative on purpose just going off the information at hand

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