I used to love it and the attention it brought me. I could get parties started anywhere, make people laugh. I had a ball. I was told when I left the scene it was strange. The party stopped and everyone dispersed and faded away into separate lives. I got admit it was an amazing time, atleast I lived life to the full. Eventually it got the better of me, I realised I had gone as far as I could without loosing total sanity and had to stop.. I had to give up my obsessive behaviour with drugs and alcohol, went cold turkey, hallucinated a bit and enjoyed the mind warp sobriety offered. Today I've been sober 21 years. After working on my own psychology a subject I enjoy I found I can live a drug free life. A lady offered me a drink recently and I said "No thanks I've earned the right to feel good" She got what I meant and cheered me on. (Most people love my optimism and thrive on it, but don't get how to apply it to their own life). They rather wallow in self pity and wait for someone to pick them up rather than enjoy the challenge to grow spiritually. Mind you thsats where I come in so there is always someone to work on. An ENTJ concept: Fast track to the future(end result where you see yourself healled) Bring back the victory and the joy that is there and live it today! Laugh at the pitifal attempt of those who tried to bring you down and when ready...Thank them for the life changing experience! Someone recently talked to me about burn out...My response: I don't burnout I just burn Brighter! From one ENTJ to another...Everyone loves and laughs and cheers me on when I make statements with heroic overtones, but won't speak it out themselves even when they know if they do they can have it.