[INTP] INTP lies

[Spamtar]

It feels less binding and squeamish if you trivialize it by spelling it "luv," don't it?

it does...yet even so...it tough enough to say luv....

luv

Spamtar

 

[Blank]

I'm actually quite a bit surprised at how similar the ideals have been between the people who've posted in this thread.

 

[kafkacat]

I dated an intp liar for six years, he could say the most beautiful things to calm my soal, but i later often questioned the truth in those words, i don't doubt that he loved me in his own way, once i let him in, he truelly played and manipulated what i had given him. It was the worst relationship of my life. I really feel at a loss knowing i wasted so much time with him. Be careful..that's all.

 

[Spamtar]

Karen?

 

[avolkiteshvara]

I dated an intp liar for six years, he could say the most beautiful things to calm my soal, but i later often questioned the truth in those words, i don't doubt that he loved me in his own way, once i let him in, he truelly played and manipulated what i had given him. It was the worst relationship of my life. I really feel at a loss knowing i wasted so much time with him. Be careful..that's all.

That doesn't sound like an INTP. INTP manipulation is short term.

 

[Spamtar]

Uh er...not necessarily always...
Our Pness can drag things out for a long time if the other side is open to it. Usually better to make a clean break at the top of the game strategically and ethically yet sometimes we just don’t wanna let go. Often it is Js (commitment and consistency tendencies) that fall into these "traps". Usually the intent is "innocent" but then there is our tendency towards procrastination. Often we fail to admit incompatible long term goals and the short term benefits seem at times to outweigh making a final decision…

 

[Infidel]

INTP's don't like to lie, but they can and will do it if the situation calls for it. They are generally very good at it too.

 

[Salt n' pepper]

Do INTPs have a tendency to stretch the truth? Or even just create off the wall stories? I am seriously in love with an INTP who says he loves me, too. But sometimes I get these horrible feelings that he is lying to me about things... but when I rationalize it in my head, I can find ways that support what he is saying, but it is so grandiose that it makes me hard to believe it! This is VERY difficult for the ENTJ part of me... please help

Holy shit. You see, I could be you right now. I'm in the same spot and guess what, my head is playing dirty tricks on me. I constantly, almost instinctively think that he is gaming me. Sort of like I'm a part of his big conspiracy (against me). And just like you, I can find reasons to support what he's saying, however, I can't help thinking I'm being plotted against and that the last laugh will be on me. It kinda sucks, cause it makes me super sensitive to any signs of inconsistent behaviour and I brush off most nice things he does/says. I have to find proof for everything.

I've had this problem since I was young, with my first BF. I was sure I was part of a bet between him and his friends. We were together 5 years.

 

[Shimmy]

Holy shit. You see, I could be you right now. I'm in the same spot and guess what, my head is playing dirty tricks on me. I constantly, almost instinctively think that he is gaming me. Sort of like I'm a part of his big conspiracy (against me). And just like you, I can find reasons to support what he's saying, however, I can't help thinking I'm being plotted against and that the last laugh will be on me. It kinda sucks, cause it makes me super sensitive to any signs of inconsistent behaviour and I brush off most nice things he does/says. I have to find proof for everything.

I've had this problem since I was young, with my first BF. I was sure I was part of a bet between him and his friends. We were together 5 years.

Could well be the case... I'm sometimes in some way manipulating people, even those I love. Usually my intentions are good, it's always either a game (see the mind-fuck thread in the mature section) or a method of self-protection. If you really feel that this guy is manipulating you, be careful. If you confront him he could shy away from you whether he is or he isn't manipulating you. But if you don't confront him things might get worse, his behaviour and your perception of it. On the other hand, if you can talk openly with him (which might be kind of hard if you're in the 'dating' face) just tell him how you feel. If he's the open-minded cool type of guy he will understand that you might feel uncomfortable sometimes and the both of you can find a solution.

 

[Fluffywolf]

Do INTPs have a tendency to stretch the truth? Or even just create off the wall stories? I am seriously in love with an INTP who says he loves me, too. But sometimes I get these horrible feelings that he is lying to me about things... but when I rationalize it in my head, I can find ways that support what he is saying, but it is so grandiose that it makes me hard to believe it! This is VERY difficult for the ENTJ part of me... please help

INTP's don't accept truths easily, unless they can constructively support it. Thus it often may seem we 'stretch the truth'. Whilest in reality their just trying to keep an open mind and don't feel they have enough knowledge to support the truth unquestionably.

Pathological liars are amongst all types, INTP's may also fall into those patterns when unhealthy. And there are no doubt INTP's that lie constantly, I have no doubt about that. But I wouldn't relate that to them being INTP.


As for INTP's being manipulative. I think everyone is manipulative to some degree. INTP's just often realize it of themselves. I can be manipulative, but I am always careful with doing so and never for the wrong intentions. And those intentions are always well thought through and not split second descisions, nor based on irrelevant subjective arguements.

 

[INTP]

Holy shit. You see, I could be you right now. I'm in the same spot and guess what, my head is playing dirty tricks on me. I constantly, almost instinctively think that he is gaming me. Sort of like I'm a part of his big conspiracy (against me). And just like you, I can find reasons to support what he's saying, however, I can't help thinking I'm being plotted against and that the last laugh will be on me. It kinda sucks, cause it makes me super sensitive to any signs of inconsistent behaviour and I brush off most nice things he does/says. I have to find proof for everything.

I've had this problem since I was young, with my first BF. I was sure I was part of a bet between him and his friends. We were together 5 years.

you should test him

 

[Salt n' pepper]

you should test him

I think I'll go with Shimmy's advice and ask him head on. I'll look for an opening, avoid bad timing and then just go for it. If he is serious with me, he should want to calm any irrational fear of mine. And if he's lying, I'll find out - cause he sucks at it face-to-face. Also, finding something that does not quite make sense in a lie is not that hard.

I'm hesitant to testing him. I hate playing games. I have better things to do with my time and energy. But on the flip side, I also have better things to do than be paranoid so I think I'll either confront or shut up.

 

[wildcat]

You could only know that for sure if you were ignorant.
If you are ignorant, how can you know for sure?

That is exactly the point.
What gain is there in knowing? No gain. Only pain.

Ignorance makes the world go round.
Caesar loved Brutus.
Caesar did not know Brutus and his cronies were about to kill him.
Had he been happier if he had known?
He would have rounded up the twelve traitors and had them executed?
It would have been too late.

It happened very quickly. They had their knives under the togas..
He saw the knife of Brutus.
He said: Et tu, Brute?
Only then he knew. He was dead a few seconds later.
He did not suffer long of the truth.

 

[Salomé]

That is exactly the point.
What gain is there in knowing? No gain. Only pain.

Ignorance makes the world go round.
Caesar loved Brutus.
Caesar did not know Brutus and his cronies were about to kill him.
Had he been happier if he had known?
He would have rounded up the twelve traitors and had them executed?
It would have been too late.

It happened very quickly. They had their knives under the togas..
He saw the knife of Brutus.
He said: Et tu, Brute?
Only then he knew. He was dead a few seconds later.
He did not suffer long of the truth.

Getting back-stabbed is bliss?

Death is bliss?

Wouldn't he have been happier (and more alive) if he had been smart enough not to trust the traitors?

Thing is, there is so much ignorance in the world, you'd think there would be more happiness...

 

[nocebo]

I tell lies on a regular basis, often just to evaluate reactions.

But... I would never lie to people that I care about. Never. Because... I'm emotionally attached to them, and hurting them would hurt me, also. It is very important for me to connect with people, and I tend to place that trust in a very selected few.