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  1. #11
    Senior Member tinkerbell's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by bLAze View Post
    Also one more thing that I didn't want to mention but now I feel I must. Objectively speaking I am a good looking guy. People tell me this often and I try to be as humble as I can possibly be (which is hard for an ENTJ). This is the main reason he is drawn to me so deeply, and I know for a fact that he is bisexual. Anyways, it is hard to convey the complexity of the situation through text and without actually experiencing it yourself, but I have thought this through. I just need to know how to end it. It is what is best for ME. But I do not want to hurt this kid.
    Can any of your friends give him a ride home occationally? if so why not get them to share the load.

    I've got the T shirt on alternative sexual preferences hitting on you and I know it can be uncomfortable. But treat it as a compliment unless he makes a move which he wont I wouldn't think.

    Alternatively, you could gt yourself a girlf friend which would solve a number of issues for you you could legitmately have less time to hang out...

    Actually you could join an activity which would have the same impact as a gf - if you are an emo retard.

  2. #12

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    Quote Originally Posted by BlackCat View Post
    Oh wow. I guess I missed that detail where you mentioned other friends.

    Well in that case... Shit.

    I don't know man. If you want to end the friendship or change it you could tell him that you aren't really comfortable with what's been happening.

    But I don't really know. Apart of me wants to tell you just to end it because that's what you want to do, and another part of me wants to tell you to not end it...

    I've had experience with becoming distant with people I was really close to. If he could find some other way of getting home, or if something conveniently happened to your car to where you couldn't, then you would get much more distant. But the fact that you have classes with him poses a problem.
    I can't tell him that I want to end the friendship though. I just could not do it. It would hurt him too much.

    And even if I did tell him, what's the point? I still have to see him for every single class. And the year has only just begun...

    I think my best bet may be to force the counselor to change up my schedule and cite some BS reason as to why? It is my best plan at this point, I think

  3. #13
    Shaman BlackCat's Avatar
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    Yes do that, if the year has just begun then you still have a chance.

    I feel for you though, I hate clingy people. It's like you are nice to them and they take that as a cue that you are now their best friend because you were nice to them. But then they start to treat you way too well and then just get really annoying.
    () 9w8-3w4-7w6 tritype.

    sCueI (primary Inquisition)

  4. #14

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    Quote Originally Posted by tinkerbell View Post
    Can any of your friends give him a ride home occationally? if so why not get them to share the load.

    I've got the T shirt on alternative sexual preferences hitting on you and I know it can be uncomfortable. But treat it as a compliment unless he makes a move which he wont I wouldn't think.

    Alternatively, you could gt yourself a girlf friend which would solve a number of issues for you you could legitmately have less time to hang out...

    Actually you could join an activity which would have the same impact as a gf - if you are an emo retard.
    I trust he wouldn't make a move, although I can't say that it is not in the back of my mind. His sexuality is not my concern though, which is why I didn't include it in the OP. That is his own thing. I'll leave that to him as long as he doesn't push it upon me.

    No on else to give him a ride I'm afraid. At public school very few people can afford to drive. I am his only friend with a car.

  5. #15

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    Quote Originally Posted by BlackCat View Post
    Yes do that, if the year has just begun then you still have a chance.

    I feel for you though, I hate clingy people. It's like you are nice to them and they take that as a cue that you are now their best friend because you were nice to them. But then they start to treat you way too well and then just get really annoying.
    Thank you for not demonizing my stance! I feel awful disliking such a nice guy, but it is just who I am. I cannot trick my brain into liking him, and his presence is ruining the quality of my life.

    For example, when the bell rings I will bolt out of class and try to meet up with some other friends and he will shout my name across campus telling me to wait up for him(him lagging behind ALWAYS, inefficient as HELL). It is just tiresome. It happens everytime. He is always following me everywhere, and as much of an ass as I am, I have soft spots. I feel bad for him so I don't have the heart to tell him to fuck off.

  6. #16
    Senior Member tinkerbell's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by bLAze View Post
    I trust he wouldn't make a move, although I can't say that it is not in the back of my mind. His sexuality is not my concern though, which is why I didn't include it in the OP. That is his own thing. I'll leave that to him as long as he doesn't push it upon me.

    No on else to give him a ride I'm afraid. At public school very few people can afford to drive. I am his only friend with a car.

    Ok I didn't think he would make a move, my experience in simiar situation was similar... just a crush... not much different than any other.

    I feel for the whole ENTJ -which can be a bit exploitative at the best of time, so it's good that you are trying to put some distance into the relationship.

    I really think finding activities he likes more than you or you are better at than he is that creates some division in time will serve you well.

    I fully agree you have all year to put up with him if he really is that annoying... that said you could use it as a development opportunity for tollerance.

    sorry I'm bottoming out of solutions

  7. #17

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    Quote Originally Posted by tinkerbell View Post
    Ok I didn't think he would make a move, my experience in simiar situation was similar... just a crush... not much different than any other.

    I feel for the whole ENTJ -which can be a bit exploitative at the best of time, so it's good that you are trying to put some distance into the relationship.

    I really think finding activities he likes more than you or you are better at than he is that creates some division in time will serve you well.

    I fully agree you have all year to put up with him if he really is that annoying... that said you could use it as a development opportunity for tollerance.

    sorry I'm bottoming out of solutions
    All that this kid wants to do is smoke weed. I tell him no because I have better shit to do or because I simply don't want to, and he starts giving me that " am I not good enough for you?" look, and I succumb because I feel bad for him. Here is the difference

    My good friends I have zero problem saying no to. I love them because they take what I say directly. I can be straightforward with them and they will not be offended.

    This guy I need to hold everything back because he is a feeler and gets all emotional. I can't be direct with him. He is jealous of me so much so that he clings, and honestly, I am far from perfect myself. I have shit of my own to deal with, not his BS as well. Am I being unfair?

    I am trying to look at this as objectively as I can...

  8. #18
    Senior Member tinkerbell's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by bLAze View Post
    All that this kid wants to do is smoke weed. I tell him no because I have better shit to do or because I simply don't want to, and he starts giving me that " am I not good enough for you?" look, and I succumb because I feel bad for him. Here is the difference

    My good friends I have zero problem saying no to. I love them because they take what I say directly. I can be straightforward with them and they will not be offended.

    This guy I need to hold everything back because he is a feeler and gets all emotional. I can't be direct with him. He is jealous of me so much so that he clings, and honestly, I am far from perfect myself. I have shit of my own to deal with, not his BS as well. Am I being unfair?

    I am trying to look at this as objectively as I can...
    No I don't think you are beign unfair (and I'm a tough audience) .....

    You need to stop the weed, you know you are developing issues with it, and it can have long term effect that can cause huge issues in the future...

    walking on egg shells with people can be exhausting... I don't really have much more to suggest other than trying to find more productive ways of distancing while at school.

    Find him a love interest might be another, but if he has a crush that might be tough...

    Sorry I'm not being very useful to you

  9. #19

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    Quote Originally Posted by tinkerbell View Post
    No I don't think you are beign unfair (and I'm a tough audience) .....

    You need to stop the weed, you know you are developing issues with it, and it can have long term effect that can cause huge issues in the future...

    walking on egg shells with people can be exhausting... I don't really have much more to suggest other than trying to find more productive ways of distancing while at school.

    Find him a love interest might be another, but if he has a crush that might be tough...

    Sorry I'm not being very useful to you
    Yes, the weed is not good. It is my vice. I am confident that if I needed to I would be able to excercise the self-control to quit.

    No worriesthough , I know it is very complex. It is even more complex in real life. Thanks for listening though, I think I have a clearer understanding of the situation now.

    Worst case scenario, I go to college in a year and he disappears from my life. I'll just try my best to turn it into a positive and make it a tolerance experience, all the while trying to minimize contact...

  10. #20
    Senior Member tinkerbell's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by bLAze View Post
    Yes, the weed is not good. It is my vice. I am confident that if I needed to I would be able to excercise the self-control to quit.

    No worriesthough , I know it is very complex. It is even more complex in real life. Thanks for listening though, I think I have a clearer understand of the situation now.

    Worst case scenario, I go to college in a year and he disappears from my life. I'll just try my best to turn it into a positive and make it a tolerance experience, all the while trying to minimize contact...
    My flag on the weed isn't about addiction (it's not THAT addictive just habitual which you know).

    Weed can cause very pronouced paranoya and trigger mental health issues in people. It doens't take that long a tennure to create problems.....

    Yes actually a year is too long, you have holidays and breaks and school terms are only about 8 months so when do you finish - June?

    It's a tricky call because school life is pretty all consuming....

    How about getting yourself a part time job or something....

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