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  1. #51
    Freshman Member simulatedworld's Avatar
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    ENTJs aren't lucky in success; they're just incredibly hard workers and they strive tirelessly to get what they want.

    They aren't unlucky in love, either; they're just callous pricks with little to no genuine concern for others.
    If you could be anything you want, I bet you'd be disappointed--am I right?

  2. #52
    Scream down the boulevard LadyJaye's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by justxher View Post
    The only thing I've tried to do is work on my P but I find that no matter how flexible I act and how much I restrict my Judging, I still feel like I'm cheating myself trying to make something work when I know the person will never fit my standards.
    I'm a P, and I still feel that way too. My criteria for a romantic relationship is high, within the realms of human comprehension, but very high just the same, and the possibility that NO ONE will fit this is profoundly deflating. But, dating people I know instantly won't work out is such a giant waste of my time and theirs. I've dated people who were great people - nothing wrong with them really - but I just couldn't extend my entire self to them. Some of my friends couldn't understand why I would cut a perfectly decent guy loose, but I just can't be with someone who isn't right. If that means I may be alone most of the time, then I'm prepared for that. You have to click with someone. It has to be right, or it's wasted effort.

  3. #53
    Senior Member WoodsWoman's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by simulatedworld View Post
    They aren't unlucky in love, either; they're just callous pricks with little to no genuine concern for others.
    Not in my experience. Or perhaps I have just been fortunate enough to know mature adults.

  4. #54
    Pose! Salt n' pepper's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by simulatedworld View Post
    ENTJs aren't lucky in success; they're just incredibly hard workers and they strive tirelessly to get what they want.

    They aren't unlucky in love, either; they're just callous pricks with little to no genuine concern for others.
    I think when I do care about someone, my concern is as genuine as it gets. I might not show it in a traditional way, or in a way you'd perceive as "caring", but I'm as loyal to you as a blind mans dog.

    EDIT: I think making me care about someone, in the first place, is the hard part. It's actually more natural for me to care about causes and peoples goals, needs, dreams ect. than the actual person. If that makes any sense.

  5. #55
    man-made neptunesnet's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by DiscoBiscuit View Post
    Basically my main issue is this, how can I best reconcile my desire for a relationship with my inability to accept anyone who doesn't fit into what purpose they should play in my life without compromising my rigid, and often life saving system of ideals?

    I know its vain to look at others solely based on what they can do for you, and I hate that I do it, but so far I haven't had too much luck with, or incentive to change my ways.

    Any thoughts or perspectives would be welcome! Thanks for listening.
    This may sound a little strange, but those rigid ideals are your compass.
    You can intuit bad relationships before they even happen. Some people would kill for that skill! I'm probably going to get some flack for not scolding you for being too narrow-minded or something, but I think where you are right now is fine. If you go about it the way you are, you're bound to skip all the bad eggs, so to speak, and find the right one more easily. You'll find her if you just keep looking.
    I do the exact same thing as an NF: detect who's right or wrong right off the bat and not wasting my time. Some people who don't understand the way I operate would say that I'm being picky, but I'd say I'm merely preventing a few poorly exchanged words and a heartache. Sometimes, I have to be careful, though, because my ideals are just too restricting; however, being too lenient will end in unhappiness on my part, so I just try to stay true to my intuition while keeping it in check.

    The only advice I know to give is don't limit yourself too much but also don't compromise on your happiness.

  6. #56
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    Simulated World -

    I think that when we are TRULY in love, we actually care, just about that person. And try to be more conscious of it... "try"

  7. #57
    Riva
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    Quote Originally Posted by FDG View Post
    Mmm no, no problems for me in either. Sux 2 be u.
    dude the rest of the ENTJ posters just kicked your ass by agreeing with the OP.
    Maybe you should take another one of those tests again.

  8. #58
    pathwise dependent FDG's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Curzon View Post
    dude the rest of the ENTJ posters just kicked your ass by agreeing with the OP.
    Maybe you should take another one of those tests again.
    Nah, I'm just awesome.
    ENTj 7-3-8 sx/sp

  9. #59
    Riva
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    Quote Originally Posted by FDG View Post
    Nah, I'm just awesome.
    that's the spirit.

  10. #60
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    Quote Originally Posted by Salt n' pepper View Post
    I think when I do care about someone, my concern is as genuine as it gets. I might not show it in a traditional way, or in a way you'd perceive as "caring", but I'm as loyal to you as a blind mans dog.

    EDIT: I think making me care about someone, in the first place, is the hard part. It's actually more natural for me to care about causes and peoples goals, needs, dreams ect. than the actual person. If that makes any sense.
    TOTAL sense...

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