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[ENTP] ENTP's being condescending

tinkerbell

New member
Joined
Aug 31, 2008
Messages
3,487
MBTI Type
ENTP
I think NT's are prone to it...

I think there is a blend between - people asking question and the NT's answering the question, but unaware of what the other person knows already - or the question wasn't really what they wantedto know

NT's often can be pretty dissmissive, without sufficient exposure to a person (NTJ's). The judge if a person is worthy of them spending time with.

so yes in my experience any NT can be condesending.
 

sculpting

New member
Joined
Jan 28, 2009
Messages
4,148
My newest favorite entp has done this to me several times lately. He does not mean to be rude-he just pops out with these retorts. He cant help it. He is young-28-and has a crazy strong NeTi but when Fe shows it is more him being quiet and watching. Once he knows you he forgets to use Fe.

Me: Have you considered setting up dilutions across the plate?
Him: WHY would I do that?

Which of course made me burst into hysterical giggles as it was sooooooo entp. I didnt take it as rude-more as I could see how my suggestion conflicted with what his Ti was telling him was logical. Most likely he is right, so I didnt take offense, I keep him around and use him mercilessly for his brain, so he'd better be right. (I also told him that-he seemed to like it)

He also told me that I am crazy but that he is crazy as well so it's okay. He has known me for three years so I guess he'd know. He also gave me good entp boy advice the other day. I explained how confusing another entp guy had been to me and he said "oh, yeah, I do that all the time, my emotions confuse me and I don't know what I feel. I really do care a lot, but then they go away and I just move on." He is my new drinking buddy. I am going to find him a nice infj girl.
 

raindancing

actinomycetes
Joined
Feb 28, 2008
Messages
346
MBTI Type
INFP
Enneagram
4w5
Instinctual Variant
sx/sp
I know an ENTP, he's only 18 and still has quite a bit of maturing to do, but a nice guy all the same. He does have a tendency to try to one-up people. In my opinion, he doesn't mean it to be rude, but people often take it that way...

When he does it to me I just ask him to stop, if it is annoying me, and he always repects that. It took me awhile to learn to actually speak up, I used to be afraid of hurting his feelings or something :laugh:, but he's never phased.

Recently we have been talking and he told me that he's working at stopping himself from doing this... then he asked my advice on interacting with people. :huh:
 

onemoretime

Dreaming the life
Joined
Jun 29, 2009
Messages
4,455
MBTI Type
3h50
Two issues:

1. Information is information to us, nothing more or less, so we lose sight of the social connotations when we're dealing with plain info. This usually serves us well, but it's what can come across as condescending (since we're implying that we know more than the other person, when we're really just sharing what we know neutrally).

2. I get in trouble a lot when I slow down and parse my words carefully, seeming as if I'm talking down to the other person, when I'm really just trying to say exactly what I mean and make sure the other person understands completely (as it's hard to translate what goes on in my brain to English sometimes)
 
O

Oberon

Guest
Oh no, we're never condescending, nor are we ever sarcastic...but if you like, I can use smaller words to help you understand.
 

ilovetrannies

New member
Joined
May 13, 2009
Messages
83
MBTI Type
ISFP
Too lazy to use our brains!? How about your advice is irrelevant and an unwarranted assumption? No offense, but I don't give a shit about the obvious, obnoxious drivel that always spews outta your damn mouths. Here how about shut the fuck up, once in awhile.
 

Ezion

New member
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Dec 9, 2008
Messages
45
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INTP
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5w4
I had an ENTP friend that was never condescending. Actually, he was generally quite nice and friendly to those around him.

Perhaps he should give some lessons to the ENTPs 'round here.
 

Lex Talionis

New member
Joined
Sep 21, 2009
Messages
382
MBTI Type
INTJ
I don't find ENTPs condescending so much as I find them irresponsible in performing their duties, and irrational when their opinions clash with my own. They quickly resort to bitter, almost passive-aggressive nit picking and stubborn refusal to accept my reasoning. Apart from that, the few ENTPs that I know are usually very interesting to be with, and I find that they add a complementary sense of adventure to the situation. I am rarely ever bored when I am spending time with them, even when we're just sitting in a room with nothing to do. They can be condescending, but it is usually insincere and they rarely intend to seriously insult you.
 

Katsuni

Priestess Of Syrinx
Joined
Aug 22, 2009
Messages
1,238
MBTI Type
ENTP
Enneagram
3w4?
I don't find ENTPs condescending so much as I find them irresponsible in performing their duties, and irrational when their opinions clash with my own. They quickly resort to bitter, almost passive-aggressive nit picking and stubborn refusal to accept my reasoning. Apart from that, the few ENTPs that I know are usually very interesting to be with, and I find that they add a complementary sense of adventure to the situation. I am rarely ever bored when I am spending time with them, even when we're just sitting in a room with nothing to do. They can be condescending, but it is usually insincere and they rarely intend to seriously insult you.

Psst yeur J is showing =3

"I find them irresponsible in performing their duties, and irrational when their opinions clash with my own."

This's because the ENTP generally views things from many perspectives at once, then narrows them down systematically. It's not a matter of stubborn refusal, as it is that yeu are stubbornly refusing to accept that ANY perspective OTHER than yeur own is possible, as yeu've already done a good job of showing in the few posts yeu've made so far.

Those who can see things from many points of view will invariably notice that yeur lack of capacity to think beyond yeur own already decided upon answer, will be trying to show yeu alternative ways of looking at things. Yeu, however, are insistant that the first answer yeu came to is already correct, and anything else must be wrong by default. All evidence presented is ignored, or twisted to ensure that it further supports yeur position.

That being said, look at yeur arguments with ENTP's as such:

Yeu have internally decided upon something without considering external information, nor considering even discussing it with anyone; yeu do so logically with the NT, but are so bound to it by yeur excessive J that yeu are incapable of going beyond that decision yeu've reasoned out.

The ENTP's, on the other hand, will be bouncing their ideas off of yeu, and one of the major things they do, is try to understand all the possible perspectives, and compare the alternative options, and specifically whot's wrong and flawed with the point yeu have. To understand yeur concept, they will chip away at it endlessly and pry it apart; if yeu can hold it up with logic, and proof, they'll believe yeu. If yeu refuse new information or don't take to their nitpicking/prying all that well, they'll consider yeu a closed minded bigot who refuses to see the truth.

Yeur best way to deal with us, is to be open to explaining yeurself, and especially explaining yeur line of reasoning. If there's a supposed flaw provided, provide evidence to support why it's either not a flaw, or why it doesn't matter. If yeu refuse to do that though, yeu'll generally just make yeurself look really bad, and a strong debating ENTP will parade yeu around showcasing yeu to the world as little more than a dancing monkey.

Of course, with yeur pride and inability to see it from anyone else's perspective, yeu probably won't even realize yeu're being tossed around verbally like a frissbee. Because yeu will assume that because yeu are right, and have provided yeur 'obvious' explaination, that 'obviously' everyone must recognize how right yeu are. When chances are, it's anything but the case.

Be wary the debating style of ENTP's, because INTJ's are virtually defenseless against such unless they're conciously aware of the dispairity of debating style. And worst yet, yeu probably won't know when they've considered yeu beaten and are just toying with yeu after that point. So be very, very cautious and think yeur arguments out well, and don't underestimate an ENTP in verbal battle ^.~
 

EcK

The Memes Justify the End
Joined
Nov 21, 2008
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7,707
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They quickly resort to bitter, almost passive-aggressive nit picking and stubborn refusal to accept my reasoning.
sure you aren't confusing another type for entp?
disclaimer: I will use type clichés because it's 7 am and i'm tired and find it vaguely amuzing

I mean, bitter, ? I don't think that's even in my emotional range and haven't really noticed it in other entps either.

NIT PICKING ??? SERIOUSLY ?

I'll give you my hum very general view on intj reasoning: The range is usually small and it doesn't include enough elements, hence it's full of huge logical deadzones. Only works for well defined mathematical problems or in fields were quoting sources of authority can be considered as a remotly correct way to construct a logical argumentation.
 

EcK

The Memes Justify the End
Joined
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Too lazy to use our brains!? How about your advice is irrelevant and an unwarranted assumption? No offense, but I don't give a shit about the obvious, obnoxious drivel that always spews outta your damn mouths. Here how about shut the fuck up, once in awhile.

*shakes head*
"See, you wouldn't say that if your lonely brain cell had some company. " <- yes that was for the thread, you can drop the knife.

Have a cookie dear as there's just no denying such obvious facts. I'll help people if they just lack knowledge in a field as it's absolutly alright and I'm the first to admit it when I don't know something and'll be glad to learn something new, but i'd like to assume that I'm surrounded by capable human beings.
The only other solution would be to aknowledge these people as stupid, and I really prefer to assume they're lazy in order to keep some faith in humanity and everything.
 

jenocyde

half mystic, half skeksis
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Jan 2, 2009
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Thank you, EcK. You are a lot kinder than me.
 

onemoretime

Dreaming the life
Joined
Jun 29, 2009
Messages
4,455
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3h50
I don't find ENTPs condescending so much as I find them irresponsible in performing their duties, and irrational when their opinions clash with my own. They quickly resort to bitter, almost passive-aggressive nit picking and stubborn refusal to accept my reasoning.

Yeah... that's the "you don't know that" game. It's usually when you're talking out of your ass that I start playing that. Irresponsible in our duties? Since when was "duty" so sacrosanct as to be unquestioningly followed? If it's seemingly unnecessary but you want it done so damn much, why don't you do it yourself, or explain why it's necessary?

Too lazy to use our brains!? How about your advice is irrelevant and an unwarranted assumption? No offense, but I don't give a shit about the obvious, obnoxious drivel that always spews outta your damn mouths. Here how about shut the fuck up, once in awhile.

Whoa, slow your roll there, buddy. If you're coming to us for emotional support - look elsewhere, because you should have figured out by now that this isn't our strong suit. When dealing with pure information, an ENTP's emotional affect is very limited - usually limited to either elation (over discovery of new connections) or agitation (over being frustrated by something). Even these reactions are relatively rare; the most common situation is no emotion whatsoever.

So why not just use Google and quit wasting our time? We do have a tendency to get off track very easily, you know.
 

Koocoomoo

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Mar 27, 2009
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4w3?
HELL YEAH

:hi:I've ALWAYS complained about ENTPs being... less than sensitive.
 

entropie

Permabanned
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Apr 24, 2008
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entp
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Me, condescending ? No way
Me, forgetting someone in the woods I dont like ? Way

exploitableiamdisappoinsv10.jpg
 

stellar renegade

PEST that STEPs on PETS
Joined
Jul 13, 2009
Messages
1,446
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ESTP
Two issues:

1. Information is information to us, nothing more or less, so we lose sight of the social connotations when we're dealing with plain info. This usually serves us well, but it's what can come across as condescending (since we're implying that we know more than the other person, when we're really just sharing what we know neutrally).

2. I get in trouble a lot when I slow down and parse my words carefully, seeming as if I'm talking down to the other person, when I'm really just trying to say exactly what I mean and make sure the other person understands completely (as it's hard to translate what goes on in my brain to English sometimes)

My friend seems to be constantly aware of social connotations, but that second point makes a whole lot of sense to me.

Actually, he's said that he thinks in words, but I think it's just that he has to slow down and sort it all out in a more simplistic, understandable fashion.

Alot of stuff that was said in this thread sounds so familiar. He's also said before that he used to get a pretty big ego because teachers and his mom told him early on that he was extremely smart for his age.

There are just all kinds of habits that he has that come off as condescending and make me think he still has somewhat of an ego.

Anyways, I think Jeffster said it best. :yim_rolling_on_the_
 

Lex Talionis

New member
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Sep 21, 2009
Messages
382
MBTI Type
INTJ
Psst yeur J is showing =3

"I find them irresponsible in performing their duties, and irrational when their opinions clash with my own."

This's because the ENTP generally views things from many perspectives at once, then narrows them down systematically. It's not a matter of stubborn refusal, as it is that yeu are stubbornly refusing to accept that ANY perspective OTHER than yeur own is possible, as yeu've already done a good job of showing in the few posts yeu've made so far.

So because somebody looks from many perspectives at once, it is impossible to keep a clear view on the goal? What exactly are you getting at? What so called "perspective" am I failing to consider? Simply because I dismiss erroneous claims that have nothing to do with the topic does not make me ignorant of somebody else's opinion.

You are proving my point right now, by your invective commentary and irrational clinging to your volatile opinions.

Those who can see things from many points of view will invariably notice that yeur lack of capacity to think beyond yeur own already decided upon answer, will be trying to show yeu alternative ways of looking at things.

I've seen you make this bizarre claim several time now, and I am still unsure as to its intended purpose. What is my "already decided" answer? You make it seem as if views spontaneously appear in my mind without any prior research and observation. Does this make any sense whatsoever? Are you serious when you type this drivel?

Looking at something from many perspectives is completely useless when one doesn't know how to draw logical conclusions. No wonder ENTPs like you become so indecisive and make blunders that you later take back (which you yourself have claimed), you are incapable of staying objective and on point!

Yeu, however, are insistant that the first answer yeu came to is already correct, and anything else must be wrong by default. All evidence presented is ignored, or twisted to ensure that it further supports yeur position.

That being said, look at yeur arguments with ENTP's as such:

Yeu have internally decided upon something without considering external information, nor considering even discussing it with anyone; yeu do so logically with the NT, but are so bound to it by yeur excessive J that yeu are incapable of going beyond that decision yeu've reasoned out.

Again, my decisions must be magically implanted into my head. :rolleyes:

The ENTP's, on the other hand, will be bouncing their ideas off of yeu, and one of the major things they do, is try to understand all the possible perspectives, and compare the alternative options, and specifically whot's wrong and flawed with the point yeu have.

So this is why ENTPs are frequently flighty and incoherent! You mindlessly strive for different options without any set goal in mind, failing to look at your own analysis properly.

Thank you for clarifying that.

To understand yeur concept, they will chip away at it endlessly and pry it apart; if yeu can hold it up with logic, and proof, they'll believe yeu. If yeu refuse new information or don't take to their nitpicking/prying all that well, they'll consider yeu a closed minded bigot who refuses to see the truth.

No, ENTPs don't just "believe" you when you present them logic and proof, they become passive aggressive and begin accusing you of refusing to listen to them. Typical Ad hominem attacks, which you yourself seem to be very familiar with.

Yeur best way to deal with us, is to be open to explaining yeurself, and especially explaining yeur line of reasoning.

Eh, doesn't this apply to everyone? Clear and logical reasoning is fundamental to proving your assertions.

If there's a supposed flaw provided, provide evidence to support why it's either not a flaw, or why it doesn't matter.

It's funny that you would mention providing evidence, since I've seen many ENTPs accept and present anecdotal evidence without second thought.

If yeu refuse to do that though, yeu'll generally just make yeurself look really bad, and a strong debating ENTP will parade yeu around showcasing yeu to the world as little more than a dancing monkey.

If one doesn't have a clear and rational point, they will invariably "look bad," regardless of who is "parading you around as little more than a dancing monkey."

Of course, with yeur pride and inability to see it from anyone else's perspective, yeu probably won't even realize yeu're being tossed around verbally like a frissbee. Because yeu will assume that because yeu are right, and have provided yeur 'obvious' explaination, that 'obviously' everyone must recognize how right yeu are. When chances are, it's anything but the case.

This is an outright personal attack, and I have no idea where to go from here. It is entirely besides the point, and if you feel like delving into a dull and tasteless battle of pointing out each others' speculated character flaws, I would rather just avoid it.

I ask you once more, what perspective am I unable to consider?

Be wary the debating style of ENTP's, because INTJ's are virtually defenseless against such unless they're conciously aware of the dispairity of debating style. And worst yet, yeu probably won't know when they've considered yeu beaten and are just toying with yeu after that point. So be very, very cautious and think yeur arguments out well, and don't underestimate an ENTP in verbal battle ^.~

INTJs are far from defenseless against the "debating style" of ENTPs, who make a rapid series of non-related deductions in an effort to "blitzkrieg" somebody out of the debate, which after the eventual realization that all of the ENTP's points are irrelevant, slowly turns in favor of the INTJ. ENTPs hold almost no water in longer debates.

I'll give you my hum very general view on intj reasoning: The range is usually small and it doesn't include enough elements, hence it's full of huge logical deadzones. Only works for well defined mathematical problems or in fields were quoting sources of authority can be considered as a remotly correct way to construct a logical argumentation.

Ad hominem, bare assertion, and a straw man!

Well, it is no surprise that ENTPs are the weakest of the four rational types. Look at you lot...
 

OrangeAppled

Sugar Hiccup
Joined
Mar 20, 2009
Messages
7,626
MBTI Type
INFP
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4w5
Instinctual Variant
sp/sx
All of the ENTPs I know IRL have this permanent condescending tone to their voice. It's like their default mode.
 
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