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[NT] Reproduction

xNTx's views about having children?

  • Female - Already have children

    Votes: 2 3.9%
  • Female - Definitely want children

    Votes: 5 9.8%
  • Female - Might want children

    Votes: 5 9.8%
  • Female - Not sure

    Votes: 1 2.0%
  • Female - Probably don’t want children

    Votes: 8 15.7%
  • Female - Definitely don’t want children

    Votes: 4 7.8%
  • Female - Can’t have children

    Votes: 0 0.0%
  • Male - Already have children

    Votes: 2 3.9%
  • Male - Definitely want children

    Votes: 6 11.8%
  • Male - Might want children

    Votes: 7 13.7%
  • Male - Not sure

    Votes: 6 11.8%
  • Male - Probably don’t want children

    Votes: 2 3.9%
  • Male - Definitely don’t want children

    Votes: 2 3.9%
  • Male - Can’t have children

    Votes: 1 2.0%

  • Total voters
    51

tinkerbell

New member
Joined
Aug 31, 2008
Messages
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Hi

I was once told by a doctor friend of mine that actually there is no rational reason to want children...

Just wondred where other NT's stand on this....

Lis
 

Haphazard

Don't Judge Me!
Joined
Apr 14, 2008
Messages
6,704
MBTI Type
ENFJ
Hi

I was once told by a doctor friend of mine that actually there is no rational reason to want children...

Just wondred where other NT's stand on this....

Lis

Rational reason to want children: to want your DNA passed on, to want an heir.

But do you really need these things?

It depends on the person.
 

tinkerbell

New member
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Aug 31, 2008
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ENTP
Just interested to see if NT's didn't want kids...

Is having an heir rational? I'm not so sure....
 

Night

Boring old fossil
Joined
Nov 2, 2007
Messages
4,755
MBTI Type
INTJ
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Can you expand a bit?

"No rational reason" is too vague to comment on.
 

tinkerbell

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not really - I never said I agreed with him, just that that was the line he took, which I would think knowing him means it's like to be an emotional need. I guess he ws use to taling to infertile couples.... perhaps

Lis
 

Totenkindly

@.~*virinaĉo*~.@
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What NT doesn't want to raise their own army of little NT-indoctrinated clones?
Mua ha ha ha!

Seriously, kids are a huge commitment and reduce lifestyle flexibility and individual options. There's a lot you have to do to be stable and consistent for the sake of the kids, and a lot of energy to invest.

But I never regretted my kids, ever. It was also an opportunity to watch people grow from the ground up -- an amazing learning experience (that part can appeal to NTs.... "so this is how it works!") -- and it also changed me to be a better person even if I didn't like the early years. There's also a big difference between child care of a baby or a toddler versus care of older kids. It was amazing to watch my kids "awake," and once they start communicating and investing in the relationship from their end, it's really sort of cool... especially now that they're autonomous individuals in their early teens.

My INTP son and I talk about a lot of stuff, it was amazing watching his brain wake up (both his smarts and his sense of humor) when he was 4 or 5 and watching where it went over the years. It's also a nice feeling to have those deep relationships with other people because of an investment made in their lives; I might flub other relationships, but my kids and I are committed to being as close as we can.

I don't know if parenting could ever be called a "rational" decision but it's not irrational either. It's arational.
 

tinkerbell

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Aug 31, 2008
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Jennifer

I agree with what you say, however the part about changed lifestyle/commitment/constraints might not appeal to NT's...

It'll be interesting to see how the genders fall out
 

Night

Boring old fossil
Joined
Nov 2, 2007
Messages
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INTJ
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Ah, okay. Within the context of an emotional setting, I can better see where he's coming from.

As a method of psychological safety, I can see people wanting to surround themselves with other people. Can make life seem less isolated, which could reduce instances of negative emotion. What's more, working to reproduce one's "positive" traits - both physically and cognitively - can bolster a general sense of personal accomplishment and self-satisfaction.

Flipping the coin, the urge for companionship doesn't necessarily have to include reproduction for satiety (if one even feels the urge at all). Companionate behavior is an instinctive desire; possibly an ancestral leftover intended to hedge our bets for survivial against an unfamiliar environment. That said, it varies from person to person.

Is either a rational response? Sure. Why not. "Rational" is kind of an oblique term that could encompass almost any behavior, depending on one's goals and incentives in life.
 
Joined
Apr 23, 2009
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Hi

I was once told by a doctor friend of mine that actually there is no rational reason to want children...

Just wondred where other NT's stand on this....

Lis

I don't think there are any rational reasons for having or wanting kids. The reasons are all either biological/biochemical (pre-programed) or emotional (or accidental). Those reasons could easily be rationalized, but that does not mean that they are logical. Maybe if you were a king or queen you'd be obligated to have at least one kid (I think), but obligations aren't always logical either. Maybe there are special circumstances that could argue in favor of having kids, in a logical fashion - don't know what they are yet but I'd imagine it'd have something to do with death and having someone to take care of whats left, or whatever (but that wouldn't be fair to that kid, I'd rather sell..) On my scale, the cons of having kids outweighs the pros by tons. At least when it comes to rational motivation. Having kids just doesn't make a whole lot of sense to me. I always ask WHY? Why, or what are the reasons for having kids? Anything besides "just cause". The closest thing to having kids, for me, is adoption. That makes way more sense to me, and if I were to adopt, I'd do it way later in my life when I know it'll be worth it. Also, it seems kind of selfish to have kids (would you be doing anybody any good by having kids?). But on the other hand, maybe I'm too selfish (and too young) to have kids. It all boils down to whether you want kids, or not. If you want kids, the reasons for having kids are rational, if you don't want kids, the reasons for not wanting kids are rational.
 

Haphazard

Don't Judge Me!
Joined
Apr 14, 2008
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Just interested to see if NT's didn't want kids...

Is having an heir rational? I'm not so sure....

Where else would your vast wealth go? You want it to go to someone who can take care of it, who you can trust, who you have indoctrinated since birth...

you see what I mean?

Then again I don't think this matters so much to me because I'm neither rich nor fertile.
 

Salomé

meh
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I don't think there are any rational reasons for having or wanting kids. The reasons are all either biological/biochemical (pre-programed) or emotional (or accidental). Those reasons could easily be rationalized, but that does not mean that they are logical.

Rational means based on reason. You'd think Rationals would know this.(!)

The majority of children born today, are born for economic reasons.
 
Joined
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Rational means based on reason. You'd think Rationals would know this.(!)

The majority of children born today, are born for economic reasons.

If you continue reading my post, you'd see that's what I concluded.
 

Matthew_Z

That chalkboard guy
Joined
Jun 15, 2009
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xxxx
-insert statement about how reproduction is irrational when compared to adoption-
 

tinkerbell

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Where else would your vast wealth go? You want it to go to someone who can take care of it, who you can trust, who you have indoctrinated since birth...

you see what I mean?

Then again I don't think this matters so much to me because I'm neither rich nor fertile.

I would think most people see their lives beign etended by children - hence your point makes sence... however if you have no wealth it seem lame....

I do kind off, but children = reduced weath, they are expensive little blighters to keep.
 
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-insert statement about how reproduction is irrational when compared to adoption-

Well, I'd help a kid out, who needs a home and someone to care for them. These kids are already out there, why should I produce new ones? If I don't care about my kids being my own flesh and blood, why should I produce new kids when there are kids out there in better need of "me wanting kids"? I think it'd be a win-win situation. Also, I think we're headed for overpopulation, I don't think I have motivation/reason enough to contribute to that. Although, I might have to have a kid one day when all the oldies die and there are no people left on this earth. I've read that the population of older persons has been on the rise, while the numbers of young persons has fallen.
 

Salomé

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^Lots of children compensate for a Welfare State.
Or are subsidized by one.
 
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